Modern Families

The one thing that defines a parent is their love for a child, whether it be their biological child, a grandchild, or an adopted or fostered child.

This is a judgement-free zone for parents to come together, ask questions, and share resources about the unique challenges and joys of nontraditional parenting and family life.

Anonymous posted in Bathing Thursday

first Haircuts?

When did you get your little man first hair cut? I know his hair is short but it’s more like I want to trim up the hair that don’t stay down and stick up. Especially the top back of his hair. That part always feel rough like there food and not soft. Makes him look like a duck lol. I mean I know I’m going to probably wait till he’s 2 but just curious if anybody cleaned up their kids hair? Put so... More

  • Amanda

    I cut my son's hair when it got long enough to mat in the back. He was just getting really tangled and didn't have the patience for me to brush it out everyday so he got a haircut.

  • Anonymous

    Ok see everybody tells me to wait but I just want it clean up but idk if he will stay still. It gets all tangle in the back and feels matted and I feel like he will look cute with a cute clean boy cut.

Anonymous posted in Blended Families Tuesday

Half siblings

My son is 10 months old and his half sister is exactly 3 years older than him. She is at our house every other weekend on average and he has such a hard time. He wants to do everything she is doing and touch everything she is touching - which isnt always safe or practical. He just whines and whimpers if I keep him from going over to what shes doing and he wont eat or nurse if shes in sight. We ... More

  • RASMerion

    Ten months is an especially stressful time for parenting. This is still the hight of learning about the world by putting it in my mouth.... but also significantly increased mobility and speed .... increased social awareness and desire to participate but before many key social skills have been learned... The frustration of having minimal language to express desires and fears...Intense curiosity... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life Tuesday

First time away?

How old was your baby the first time you left them over night/for the weekend?

  • Sarah

    Mine was 8mo when I left him with my husband for a long weekend and 10mo when we both left him with aunt/uncle/grandparents for a long weekend

  • Brianne

    My son spent his first night away at grandma’s (5 minutes from us) at 5 weeks old and does this about once a month. She loves taking care of him and we are thankful for the restful nights. We left him overnight with a friend at almost 4 months. We are now planning a 4 night trip where he will stay with my sister-in-law at 7 months old. I think it depends on your trust in who will be caring for... More

Separate parenting issues

This would be my first post on here. Really hoping to get some real insight and advice.. my daughter who just turned 10 yrs, recently started seeing her dad again. He hasn't seen her in over a yr. Anyway, my daughter tells me he has been bad mouthing me to her and saying things that aren't true. Things like me using her against him (which isn't true) . I was actually the parent tryi... More

  • Angie

    Hmmm, thats a tough one cuz you need to stop this but dont want to lose her trust. Try explaining to her that secrets are not to be kept between adults and children. Honestly, do you know if your ex is a narcissist? This sounds like behavior of a narc. I just recently permanently stopped communication and visitation with my childs father for many unhealthy reasons due to being a malignant cover... More


    Hey, I think you should have a talk with him and when I say "talk "not about bad mouthing you but Have a conversation, by the looks of it he's hurting inside, that why he's bad mouthing you to his daughter. As a Man and a Father I don't agree with he's action, he's wrong for doing that and using his daughter against her mom. He thinks he's hurting you by bad... More

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Dec 06

Phrases to tell your child to listen and not hit or kick.

Hi Everyone! So at school today my 3 year old told her teachers no when re-directing her. At home and school she sometimes hits and/or kicks when she's feeling angry or frustrated. I've used the phrases like "use your listening ears" "hands are not for hitting".."we dont kick people". "I don't like it when you (name action) please don't do that... More

  • T
    Dec 07

    Hands are for loving is what I say.

  • Rachel
    Dec 07

    Daniel Tiger has a song take a deep breath and ask for help. I try to address the emotion that causes the behavior that way you are being proactive. With that said it doesn’t always work but my 3 year old tells my almost 2 year old to take a deep breath when he starts getting angry

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Dec 05

Toddler Stage

I am at my wits end with the toddler stage and I'm afraid this is just the beginning with a 14 month old. Please offer guidance, tips, and advice. I find myself wanting to curl up in a ball and hide from the world every single day and I can't help but count down to bedtime. Trying not to wish away this phase because it isn't entirely all bad, but this is the hardest age for me so far.

  • Stacy
    Dec 05

    I honestly have nothing to add. The parents above said everything I would have. Just wanted to say, "Hang in there!" As long as you are calm and consistent, this stage will pass! ✊💙

  • Anonymous
    Dec 06

    My son is 15 months old and he still walk supports as he can only take a total of 10 steps before he gives up. So sometimes we get bored we go to Walmart amd we will start at the end of the store and he will “help” push the cart as in a 1 hour trip be a 2 hour trip of how slow we are going but it’s cute and it tires him out. He loves pushing the cart.

Anonymous posted in Holidays Dec 05

Gifts under the Christmas tree

How do you handle that? If Santa only delivers the gifts on Christmas Eve, then do you leave the tree bare until then? I have friends and family buying gifts and wondering if I should let them put the gifts under the tree now. And if so, how do we explain that to kids?

  • Austin
    Dec 07

    growing up, i had three siblings so we put our gifts to each other and our parents under the tree as soon as they were ready to go, which made for a decent amount of gifts. we were one of those families that opened one each on christmas eve. then christmas morning all the gifts from our parents and santa were set out, which made for a big exciting moment. as a father now, i still don't know... More

  • Jessica
    Dec 07

    I make a big emphasis of wrapping gifts we buy for others and setting them under our tree. Then, as I have time, I’ll wrap gifts for my kid and sneak them under the tree. Sometimes she notices and sometimes she doesn’t (she’s 6). By Christmas Eve, all but Santa’s gifts are under the tree. It’s fun to look at a tree full of gifts, but I know my daughter isn’t going too rip them open.

At what age did you put a blanket on your baby at night?

  • Anonymous
    Dec 04

    Around 11 months

  • Makayla
    Dec 04

    I gave my son a blankie at about 9-10 months by then he was able to kick it off him if he didn't want it

Day care drop offs?

I’m just starting to take my son (20 months) to a daycare center twice a week to get him socialized. Any tips on when I drop him off? I’ve been having my husband do it... but my son will cry for 45 minutes before he settles down.

  • Anonymous
    Dec 05

    I find that the faster I leave the better. A hug and kiss and mommy will be back soon and I’m gone. Teachers are ready with a distraction. She usually stops crying as soon as I’m out of sight. And now that she’s used to it the crying has stopped.

  • Lindsay
    Dec 08

    Be quick but don’t just vanish. Give a hug and kiss and tell him you love him and you’ll see him soon. He may get upset but keep your smile so he knows everything is ok. And you may have to turn and leave while he’s sad but it’ll be ok, just stay strong in front of him. Or he may be like my son and forget to give you a kiss when you’re leaving hahaha.

Piercing for toddlers

Disclaimer piercing a toddlers ears . Please no mean comments its just a question. How to boy moms feel about piercing one ear? In the 90's when I was in elementary school ther where boys with one ear pierced. Do boys still pierce ears and if my child askes what should I do?

  • Elena
    Dec 04

    As a tattooed and pierced family I'm ok with him making his own decision as long as he knows that anything he does has its consequences like tattoos it's something that stays on so. But thank you all for your opinions and for the opend mind it's a defecalt somgect when the age is young

  • Anonymous
    Dec 04

    AdamAnt, that’s not really true anymore.

What age did you give your son/daughter their first haircut & what should a 1st time parent expect?

  • Christa
    Dec 03

    We have decided not to cut our sons hair. It will get light trims to keep the ends healthy, but since he is part Native American we are going to keep his hair long and braided.

  • Brittany
    Dec 04

    My daughter is almost 16 months and she has had her bangs cut 4 times and hair trimmed once. I just set her on my lap and she does fine. She was born with lots of hair.

Work through it or get Divorced

How to determine if you should work through it or get divorced. I take my vows seriously so I don’t just want to up and leave when it get rough. My husband and I have been together for almost 13 yrs and married for almost 10yrs. We have 7 children, it is a his,mine, and ours. Which the kids don’t know that and we don’t use the word step. My husband has adopted mine I plan on to adopt his when ... More

  • Amanda
    Dec 04

    Thx for the kind words. It helps a lot just reading what your saying. I think it can be worked on and somewhat resolved. It will be hard and take time to figure it out but I’m hoping we can.

  • Karelis

    I would say it sounds a bit like you may have experienced or are experiencing some post partum depression? So many women suffer with it and most don’t speak on it and seek help. I too was miserable pregnant (although I wanted to be) and felt a little blue after our second child. We got pregnant when my son was around 8mths old! It sounds like your stressors are from dealing with other’s issues... More

Anonymous posted in Blended Families Dec 01

Pictures with Santa

My mother in law told me she wanted to go take a picture with her Santa my daughter and step son. Is that weird? Should I?

  • Anonymous
    Dec 03

    They are included in a lot of stuff. They have sleepovers every week if not twice some weeks. She’s over almost every other morning and we do Sunday dinners quiet often

  • Tyerra
    Dec 04

    Well if y’all do all that then it sounds like y’all are close so why not especially if she is paying lol

Horrible 2 year old

My 2.5 year old does not listen to anything she smiles when you yell at her or put her in time out she thinks she is funny. Iv tried different ways of putting her in time out.

  • Valerie
    Dec 02

    Don’t make the reward for good behavior too far away. Eg: don’t say at 3pm, if you’re good you can have dessert after dinner. That goal is HOURS away. It is incredibly difficult for a 2 year old to grasp that concept. The goal is unrealistic and unreachable. Saying DURING dinner. If you try everything on your plate you can have a treat after, is more realistic. During the day, reward him for go... More

  • Sandy
    Dec 07

    She is probably very uncomfortable and that is her way of dealing with her feelings. Also the yelling is probably hurting her and not helping. It is important for the adult to stay calm otherwise you cannot expect a child to stay calm. They take their cues from you. 2.5 years old is not old enough to be manipulative or intentionally mean as some people may think. She just needs clear boundari... More

Weaning my two year old

My daughter will be two in a few days. She is my fourth baby. My older three were weaned successfully at 16 months each(they're all boys if that matters) . I am still nursing her around the clock, in addition to regular three meals a day, snacks, dairy milk. She will throw the BIGGEST tantrums until I nurse her. I admit , I am very weak with this one. It really has become the only time my l... More

  • Anonymous
    Nov 30

    I feel the same way... idk how to get mine off. He is 16 months old and breastfeeding has just became very unhappy for me so I want to stop for my emotional stage but my son won’t either. Wakeing up 3 or 2 times to nurse don’t want daddy if I’m there. Have a practicals shove apple juice to him Bc I feel so empty so I can refill but that makes him angry. So i feel for you. It’s very angry and th... More

  • Sb
    Dec 01

    Firstly ask yourself why your weaning her, if shes not ready is your efforts worthe the while? And also if you really want her to stop rub soemthing she doesnt like on your nipple before nursing like onion garlic or somehting potent in taste but not at all harmful to the child. I'm also breast feeding my 2 and a half year old and she needs it only at nap time and bed time. I wanted to nurse... More

Anonymous posted in Babies Nov 29

Curious: Soon to be 8 months just started throwing weird crying fits

I know that this could be normal but this soon? Is this something that he possibly picked up from (rare) arguments with dad and I? Or is this just a boy thing learning how to get his way? He looks at me in the eyes and cries almost growls in a pissed off way. Not a hurt cry or a normal cry of his. Any tips or comments? Advice?

  • Anonymous
    Nov 30

    When my son started the whine and fake cry for things he wanted is when we started introducing sign language! It helped SO much cut back on the whine

  • Katie
    Nov 30

    Download the Wonder Weeks app!! Explained so much for me. It's incredibly accurate and will give you strength to get through these times, I promise!!

How to encourage baby signs

Ok so I’m like 95% sure my son has picked up the sign for milk. HOWEVER, should I be feeding him every time he signs it? To encourage his understanding? Because sometimes he does it after a feeding or when I don’t think he’s actually hungry. I don’t want to confuse him though by leaving the sign unassociated

  • Caitlin
    Nov 29


  • Nessa
    Nov 29

    I used to just say yes... you just had milk (and signed it) and we will have milk again in a little while ...

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Nov 27

Bent head/neck in car seat

Any moms (or dads) sit in the back and hold their baby’s head up while they sleep in the car seat? Someone make me feel better about letting his head just dangle 😩

  • Emily
    Nov 27

    I bought one of those too mare my daughter would woke up as if it was more uncomfortable than just dangling

  • Joanna
    Nov 28

    My older son is forward facing. I let him dangle. I don't want him napping in the car anyway. My younger son is rearfacing so he doesn't have that problem. You can check the recline options of your car seat.

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Nov 26

Independence and Hygiene

Hello! First time mom here with some silly questions. I’m wondering at what age do you have your kids independently do things like bathe themselves in the shower and other hygiene things (like trust they can thoroughly wipe after a poop)? Thanks!

  • Emi
    Dec 07

    I don’t know about others, but my oldest will be 4 next week and I still help him with nearly everything. At preschool he toilets himself but comes home sometimes with underwear stains so if he’s home I help him wipe after pooping. He brushes his teeth and flosses on his own but we always check at the end. We’ve also been encouraging him to wash his body and hair in the bath, but have to always... More

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