Reply to My Step-daughter makes me anxious

My 16 year old has so much attitude and anger from issues with her father. We’ve been divorced since she was about 5. I believe so much of her behavior focuses on her self esteem (lack of it) and she’s super sensitive. My suggestion, since you can really only control yourself, is to see where she is vulnerable and try to connect with her in that area. Maybe she loves to draw - so try to go to an art class or show. Something like that. I have learned with my 16 year old, to listen to her - and give her all my attention when I am doing so.