Posted in Behavior, Preschoolers

4-Year old's behavior and daycare's feedback

Anonymous

My 4-year-old daughter doesn't necessarily follow instructions and she doesn't pay attention in one activity for a long time e.g. while eating she moves here and there. When it's time to clean up, she doesn't clean her stuff unless we tell her some interesting or motivating stuff. Many time we end up feeding her food rather when we are in crunch time. So it takes time to finish that specific activity. Her reading, painting, and drawing is great though. My child's daycare told me while picking her up a couple of times that 'She had a great a day! The only thing she can't be the last person every time. Other than that she had a great day'. It really touched my heart and felt sad. What am I doing wrong as a parent? Any suggestions will be helpful.

  • Ally
    May 31

    Try long term incentives. My 4 yo son is the same way. We can wake up at 6am and still be late to school at 8:30. He procrastinates all the time. A reward system is good too. Ex: every time you stay in your seat and finish your food without leaveing the table you get a coin for the jar. If you put your toys away befre the rimes goes off- 2 coins in the jar. When the jar is full ahe gets a prize. I like uaing coins bc my son in all about things that are real and tangible. We then take him and his coins to the dollar store when he can pick out and pay for his own toy. *start small by using larger coins. They have to see the goal is reachable.

  • Anonymous
    May 31

    Thank you for the suggestion!

  • Anne
    May 31

    I dunno, this is pretty age appropriate I think! She may just grow out of it. My 4yo has difficulty with transitions so I just give lots of warnings: "5 more minutes to play, then we are getting our shoes on" or "5 more minutes to eat and then I'm taking the plate away. if you don't finish your food you'll be hungry later." Using simple commands also helps a lot with getting his attention. "Hey sweetie, get your shoes on" just doesn't work as well as "Felix. Shoes." Just emphasize the thing that needs to get done so they don't have to parse a complicated sentence to understand. Silly but it works!

  • Anonymous
    Jun 03

    Thank you Anne and Ally. I will try these suggestions.