Reply to Mother provides child care

I have SO been there. With my MIL. And my ex-husband only made things worse because he refused to address, or even acknowledge, any of these same issues. So at least it sounds like your partner is allied with you!! Jumping forward four years: we’ve had a private nanny, a nanny share, an expensive private preschool, and crappy in-home daycare and let me tell you, they ALL suck in one way or another. Childcare is just so darn hard, no matter how you slice it. So I know it’s easier said than done but I would encourage you to try to focus on the positive and try to avoid the trap I fell into - allowing my MIL’s faults to become all I could focus on and thinking ANYthing had to be better than dealing with her for one minute longer. Truth be told, I’d give absolutely anything to have her loving, attentive, educational care back now that I’ve been to the other side and realized the grass is not that much greener, it’s just different. Sadly though, it’s not an option now that we moved several states away... I am not in any way trying to trivialize what you’re going through. And I know when I was in the thick of it, I would have rolled my eyes at advice like this and assumed no one understood how bad it was. But I hope you will find this somewhat encouraging and take solace in knowing other mamas have been there... and come out the other side :) :)