I’m with you in the PPD boat. I was diagnosed around six months, and am now at eight months and things are starting to look up a bit. It’s totally brutal, right? I’m sending you so much love. Try to be patient and hang tight with your treatment - as I’m sure you know, it takes a really frustratingly long time for medication to start working enough for you to feel a difference. What really helped me was being told that this isn’t permanent. It’s transition. It will be better one day, and you will be yourself again (a new version of yourself, but you). So much of getting through it is just waiting. Hang tight and trust it will get better. It is a storm that you will weather, not the new norm. Getting out of the house was also hugely helpful. It took a ton of energy that I didn’t have a lot of days, but I’m glad I made myself get out at least once per day. I know you’ve been told that one, but it really is true. Another specific strategy - my therapist gave me little dot stickers to post around the house - changing table, bathroom mirror, kitchen island (places you pass frequently). When you see a dot throughout the day, you take a second to take a deep breath and tell yourself a reassuring mantra. Some of mine were “this is temporary”, “you are strong”, “you are a good mom”, and “all is well”. It could be anything that you need to hear. It sounds silly but it was actually really helpful for disrupting those mental cycles that can build as the day goes on. You are strong and you can get through this, mama!
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