Anonymous

Anybody have a partner that is dramatic when child gets sick?

I get that my husband feels bad and worries for our son when he is sick... but he acts like it’s the end of the world. He mopes around, googles a bunch and constantly asks me if everything is going to be ok or asks if I’ve called the drs office yet. Meanwhile I’m cooking, cleaning up after messes, and taking care of our sick toddler. Doesn’t matter how mild or severe the illness, he acts as if our son is on his deathbed. He’s not necessarily making more work for me since I do everything when he’s at work anyway. But it’s just the fact that he’s home and could be helping out but he’s not, and on top of that his constant questioning of whether or not our son will survive is mentally tiring. I worry too but I know what warrants a call to the dr. Our son is 2.5 yrs old. He’s had his fair share of colds and other viral infections, and visits to the ER for falls and other shenanigans. Luckily nothing bacterial with a prescribed antibiotic. You would think that by now my husband has gotten the hang of having a sick child but nope. Anyway.. anybody else in the same boat? Or was? How did you help your partner?

  • Kieli
    Jun 20

    My husband is the exact same way!! He never was really a “kid person”. So he doesn’t know how to take it. Especially when our first was in her infancy, she had 2 UTIs and we had to take her to the ER. He’s gotten better, I’ve just explained to him what’s happening and if I think it’s cause for concern and to call the dr or not. Usually when I talk to him I’ve already talked to the dr or scheduled an appointment so he doesn’t worry about it. He trusts my judgment now, especially because I’ve taken both of my daughters to the dr when I thought something was wrong but there was nothing. Just try reassuring him, letting him know you wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him, and letting him know the whole story, and what you think. Because you are home with your son all day, you know him pretty well. Try explaining that to your husband as well

  • Anonymous
    Jun 20

    The funny thing was that everyone thought my husband was more of a “kid person” than I was. I do explain to him what’s going on and what we should be looking out for and what I think... but it’s never enough. I even tell him to just call the nurse line and get reassurance himself but he never does and just does what he does - mopes, worry, google, and asks me if our son is going to live. 😪

  • A
    Jun 20

    I was this the first 4-5 months of our baby boys life. It's then that my mom pointed out I might be suffering from postpartum anxiety. Bless her. Its then that I realized that I might have had mild episodes of anxiety all my adult life. Pregnancy and being a new mom brought it out where I couldn't miss it anymore. It's much better now but it happens sometimes. I now try to stop myself and try to see if it's my anxiety or if I actually have a serious issue at hand. I use coping mechanisms that work for me. It's hard sometimes but acknowledging that it's there and having people around who help you see through it helps a lot. There is a fine line between worrying too much and anxiety. I'm not saying he has it but maybe he has it. When you have it, it's hard to be productive. It distracts you too much from focusing. Maybe talk to him about it obviously when you all are not going through something. Just my two cents.

  • anonymous mom
    Jun 20

    😂😂I think we have the same husband!!! Mine acts just like this. Everything is dramatic, including a mosquito bite (it could cause encephalitis!! What if she itches it and it becomes infected and she gets sepsis shock!?! Omg she could have hand foot and mouth and we don’t even know it!!!!!!!). I generally try to stay as mellow as possible. And when it comes to something where he panics I always say to him very calmly, “okay yes, I’ll watch it closely. I will call the dr if it continues to worsen.” I always thought this would pass but I think for him, it won’t. I pray for her future friends and boyfriends. My husband is gonna flip when she starts forming meaningful friendships outside of our family and her teachers. It’s going to worry him sick thinking of all the harm “outside influences” may have on her. Time will tell but hopefully all this worrying doesn’t lead to him having a medical issue himself!!!

  • Vicki
    Jun 20

    Let him take the kid to the doctor and ask all the questions! If he thinks it’s time to call the doctor, hand him the phone! And if he still wants to complain, tell him to call his mother! Kidding about the last part, but like I tell my toddler, whining doesn’t solve anything. So when he starts in give him a task and tell him how helpful it would be.

  • Amy
    Jun 20

    I feel like I have had a few of these moments when we had our son. I could tell my husband was getting annoyed when I truly felt that something was wrong, and it irritated me because I felt like he wasn't listening to my concerns. I've calmed down a bit more especially with my husband being deployed as weird as that is. If I think something might be out of hand, I'll call the nurse line. If I believe it to be worse, I'll call the doctor or head to urgent care. I just try to recall what the doctor said about watching certain symptoms. The only thing now is my MIL is acting in that sort of way. I'll just mention he's got a runny nose and all of a sudden, there's numerous questions asking about the rest of his health. I think she's concerned since we're first time parents but in time, I'm sure it'll pass or I might just need to talk to her. We'll see.

  • Cathy
    Jun 20

    Ummmm. I’m the one who panics when my child gets sick 🤣🤣🤣. I wish my husband was a little more OCD about it but he is so relaxed. Which is good for one of us to be I suppose!

  • Liza M.
    Jun 20

    Admittedly, I am the one who is probably a little dramatic when it comes to my LO being sick-but only when she has the stomach bug. I am always worried that she is going to throw up. I used to worry about this in regards to myself, but since my LO was born the anxiety has transfered to her. I am a very easy going person and don't bat an eyelash over any other minor illness. But I am always on high alert for the stomach bug...my husband is supportive and used to this but I wish I could just chill out about it!

  • Kendall
    Jun 22

    Definitely I am the dramatic one 🤣

  • Anonymous
    Jun 22

    You are not alone !! My husband is so extra in everything... everything!!! But you try to understand a little his position .

  • Anonymous
    Jun 23

    My husband is so overly dramatic, as well. When they are sick and with everything. We have three year old twins and I swear he almost has a heart attack every time we take them to the park. I just shake my head.