Reply to Breastfeeding Vent session

First of all, you're doing great mama! You're doing the best you can and you're trying. Don't beat yourself up over it. I was in a similar situation with my son. If you're on Facebook, PLEASE join this group ASAP! The Cleavage Club: Breastfeeding Support. It's led by an amazing IBCLC named Cass who has extensive training and experience in ties. She's actually based in southern California. All of the moderators are also trained and knowledgeable. If your baby had ties, were they released by a pediatric dentist via laser? That's the best way to ensure they were fully released, otherwise some doctors just clip them with scissors and do not fully release the ties and baby will still have difficulty latching. Either way though, you'll have to work with baby to retrain them to use their tongue properly after release. Take baby to a chiropractor specializing in infant adjustments. Craniosacral therapy was also helpful for us. Your supply can decrease if you are stressed as well, so you need to try and remain calm (I know, easier said than done). But high stress can cause a decrease. I'm sure your consultant told you already to wait 1hr after each feed to pump. That's important. You can and actually should try to pump while baby is on you skin to skin. Set up your pump next to your bed if possible. Wear a nursing bra that doubles as a hands free pumping bra. That way you don't have to do too much at pumping time. When ready to pump, if baby is napping, place her down on the bed next to you quickly and set yourself up to pump on just one side first and then place baby on the other side of your chest to continue napping and skin to skin. The skin to skin will actually help trigger let down and can help increase your supply. Plenty of skin to skin is important too for most of the day. You'll basically be living in a robe lol but it does work and also helps actually reduce stress and anxiety (fun fact). Whenever you feed baby do it skin to skin, her belly against you. Try to not use a nursing pillow because it can actually get in the way of latching. Just place pillows under your arms as needed or nurse reclining back. This will help her want to latch without the shield. With my son, I would start every feed at night with the shield for about 3-5min and then quickly unlatch him and then practice him latching on my nipple. I did it at night so my husband was there to help me. If he couldn't latch properly, I'd put the shield back on and finish the feed. But, continued to practice without the shield. Lansinoh has a tool that helps bring out a flat nipple. Hand expressing a little milk out too before a feed also helps the nipple soften, especially if your breast is too full, which will make it easier for baby to latch. I'm adding links to videos that helped me a lot and I hope they help you too. I'm 13mos in still breastfeeding and after everything I went through starting out I'm still shocked I made it this far. It does get better. Regardless, no matter how far you get, not matter what you choose to do moving forward, just know that you're awesome and you're the perfect mother chosen for your baby. Hang in there, you got this!