Posted in Behavior, Grade Schoolers, Siblings

Dealing with a Tattler

Our oldest is a rule follower and lately has started tattling on his little sister to a ridiculous degree. Has anyone else dealt with this? We love that he tries to keep her safe, but it feels like more often than not it’s so she will get in trouble.

  • Megan
    Jun 28, 2018

    Oh I just saw (minutes ago!) a little visual for teaching the kids the difference between telling and tattling. Let me see if I can find it!

  • Megan
    Jun 28, 2018
  • Jennie
    Jun 28, 2018

    Our oldest is that way as well. We usually tell him to talk to her about it and remind him that he's not responsible for others' actions. We also tell our kids that "Big Brothers/Sisters Help, Teach and Protect" so if you see your siblings making a bad choice, help them, teach them or protect them.

  • Sjolliff
    Jun 29, 2018

    This happens alot in my classrooms, and i ask my students what they would like to happen, usually they dont know, because they dont want to admit they want them to get in trouble. So i tell them that i cant help them if they dont know how they want it solved. (Also depending on age i have given choices: would you like them to apologize, or do you want me to give them detention?)

  • Jenni
    Jul 17, 2018

    Yeah, both of my overly sensitive girls constantly tattle on each other like it’s a competitive sport. I remind my first grader to “solve the problem herself” and give an example of what she can say to her sister instead of running to me. With my toddler, I assess whether the tattle is legit. If the tattle is attention-seeking behavior from my toddler, I’ll say that it’s not nice to make up stories, and then work to diffuse the situation because they’re usually fighting over something silly.

  • Vanessa
    Nov 08, 2018

    I’m a pe teacher and we get a lot of tattling from kinder-3rd grade. We finally have to tell them, if someone is hurt then come tell us but if it’s something they can solve on their own then they should do that.

  • David
    Nov 12, 2018

    we use the same simple phrase each time—“you’re telling the wrong person” (as in, if you’re concerned, go talk to your sister about it, not us).