Posted in Behavior, Toddlers

Dealing with the "terrible twos"

My son recently turned 2, though the tantrums started a few months ago. This week, however, the sh*t has hit the fan! Colossal meltdowns over everything, not listening (more than usual), refusing to ride in the shopping cart and crying "walk" then trying to grab everything on the shelf or wander off when I attempt to give him freedom. The real crux has been during nap/bedtime. We've been successfully potty training for a month and he is using that as a control method over us by screaming and crying "pee pee" as soon as he's laid down evrn though he went potty right before he is put in his crib. I don't want to invalidate him telling me he has to potty, so he gets one timed attempt to go then it's back to bed. Tonight that led to him screaming an additional 20 minutes until he cried himself to sleep. I really don't know how to handle this. Up until now, he's been pretty easy going, especially in public. Today, however, we had multiple meltdowns in public. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

  • Mimi
    Apr 12

    We’ve been dealing with almost exactly everything you described for almost a year now. In our case, year two has been full of changes for my boy, which does not help. New sister, potty training, starting daycare, me going back to work after 5 months of maternity leave… I would say that he’s generally pleasant and well behaved even though he never sits still, but anything that affects his well-being even slightly can causes huge tantrums and meltdowns. I don’t know your situation but for me, I try to make sure not to leave the house unless he’s been really well fed, and well rested. Also pick your battles. If you say “no” to him all day, there’s a point where the slightest thing that goes against his wishes will cause a meltdown. So I try to save it for the bigger things. For example, if he really is pushing my buttons by getting in my way and opening drawers in the kitchen while I’m busy, instead of just saying “don’t do that!” I try to divert his attention to another drawer farther from me where there are less things. That way he still gets to open drawers and he doesn’t feel rejected and it’s less annoying for me lol. Hang in there!

  • Anonymous
    Apr 12

    Can you try giving him more options? Like make it clear that it's time for bed or nap, so do you want red blanket or the blue blanket? Or when you are shopping, do you want to ride or hold on to the side of the Cart? But tell him if he can't hold on to the Cart then he will have to ride. When my son would melt down, run away from me, or wouldn't sit still at a restaurant I would take him out to the car and strap him in and tell him we weren't going back in until he calmed down/listened. Now when he starts to have a melt down I ask him if he needs to go sit in the car, it usually stops him from continuing.

  • Elena
    Apr 15

    I'm on the same boat its horrible especially in public and cars grabbing things meltdowns to the point we avoid taking him and we switch shopping trips so someone stays home with toddler. I have recently started watching jo frost on YouTube and TV so I can refresh my take on calming tantrums and learning about the timeout fase