I’m not trying to be judgmental at all, so bear with me here. But I honestly think when people spend a lot of time comparing what they gave vs what they received it ends up creating a lot of undue negativity and the person who offended them by not reciprocating will not change anyway. Yes, stop making effort for your mil. She clearly doesn’t make the effort for you. If your husband wants to acknowledge her for Mother’s Day then he can spend 3 minutes picking out a card and 2 extra minutes signing it, addressing it, stamping it, and sticking it in the mailbox with the flag up. Every year I send my mom and my mil a card. My mil knows it comes from me but she thanks my husband. My mom always acknowledges me in some way but she’s my closest and most treasured friend so our relationship is different. I have just come to accept that in almost every way, my mil is a selfish narcissistic person. Not because of the cards but for so many reasons (do you have a few boxes of wine? Yes I’m classy like that. Because the stories I could tell you...). Anyway, I just realized a long time ago to stop comparing. I give what I want to give and what I need to give in order not to feel bad, but that’s it. A thank you is appreciated, but if it doesn’t come then I let it go. After two or three non thank yous, if it really bothers me I stop giving. Life is too short to compare and get upset. Mother’s Day should make us feel good.
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