Anonymous

Gifts with a caveat?

I’m talking with my MIL it sounds like the gift she wants to give my kid For Christmas will stay at her house so he can only play with it when he visits. Is this a normal thing grandparents do? They already have toys for him at their house but this was labeled as a specific Christmas gift, but one that he doesn’t get to keep.

  • Lana
    Nov 10

    That’s okay they want to have something for him to play with and never get bored when he comes to his grandparents house Look at it from a different angle, if he gets to take it with him home then a week max and he will get bored from it This will teach him patience and he would learn that some things are the way it should be as parents wants it to be

  • Anonymous
    Nov 10

    Do you visit often? If not, it’s weird. But whatever, not worth making a big deal out of it

  • AdamAnt
    Nov 11

    My mom did this with large toys that we really don’t have room for in our home. That way the kiddos still get to enjoy the toys, the visit, & the family. Not sure what the dynamic is with your family, but in a smaller degree, it’s also about my mom feeling a bit of control over visits.

  • Heidi
    Nov 13

    I have no problem with this. My parents live 2500 miles away and we only get to go there a few times a year. I like that they buy gifts for my son, and i have no problem with leaving them there if thats what they prefer for a particular gift.

  • Gina
    Nov 13

    I actually suggested this myself to my parents as well as his mom - I told them if they buy her anything big it is staying at their house because we have no room! I actually try to send as much stuff as I can to give us space.

  • Anonymous
    Nov 13

    Details: we live about 20 minutes away and they see him a few times a month. The gift they want to get him isn’t a big gift or even takes up a lot of space. They enjoy having toys at their house that they’ve scouted from various sites. This, though, is an explicit Christmas gift that they want him only to play with at their house. I mean, I guess it’s just a boundary issue so I should let it go. MIL gonna MIL.

  • Arod
    Nov 13

    Not weird at all - I bet they just want to get to enjoy watching him enjoy it. Otherwise maybe they get to enjoy the excitement when he opens it then he's bored of it the next time they see him. There's also something about toys feeling new at someone else's house. My kids will play with the exact same toy they have at home at my mom's or their cousin house. Feels new again just being in a new (not home) place with it. I don't know your in laws but I would think they just want to get to enjoy the gift with him.

  • ACK
    Nov 14

    While I do understand the reasoning for keeping a designated toy at their house, will your little one understand this when it’s time to go home and they have to leave their gift? My MIL has done this too, but not for Christmas. I certainly appreciate having things at their house so we don’t have to travel with toys...but a couple of times it’s felt like just a control thing with her. I wouldn’t make an issue about it, unless my child was hurt and confused over why he or she couldn’t take home a Christmas gift they are excited about?!