Posted in In-Laws

MIL living in the 70s/vent


I just need to vent somewhere, and this is the only place to do so because I don’t want to tell my husband because it is indeed his mother. I can’t tell my parents because they will be furious and cause more drama. And I can’t tell my friends because that would be like dissing my own family. Just as a background. My hubby and I were born and raised in Asia and have in laws that are a bit more sexist. Unfortunately, I just found out that they are way more old school than I had thought. So here is the story... My in laws visited from our home country to meet my 10mo baby for the very first time. My husband and I are employed FT and were worried that we won’t have enough time to treat my inlaws and to take them around town. They spent two weeks in my 2 bedroom apartment and we had a queen size mattress in my LO’s room for them to sleep in. My LO slept in a playpen in our master bedroom. Not until they returned to their country do they start venting about how they felt unwelcome at our house. The four main reasons were 1. I did not cook for them (We did bbq at our balcony and had made some simple noodles once) 2. I had mentioned that my husbands career may be limited by the school he had gone to (he is aiming for higher jobs when he didnt graduate from one of the top notch schools) and 3. I made my daughter cry at night when she struggled to sleep in a completely new environment (I literally held her all night and worked like a zombie but I guess they heard the one hour that I did just lay the baby in the playpen so that I can get some kind of sleep). And 4. Her son(my husband) didnt have a study room in our two bedroom apt when my LO had a whole room to herself I understand possibly 2 was my bad.... but I am just wondering... what century are we living in?? You would think my in laws would think differently since they too have a daughter and they had chosen to send all their kids to live in the States for a “better life.” I bet I am not the only one that is still suffering from in laws that think they are still living in the seventies. Please vent here so that I feel a bit better...

  • Ali
    Aug 26

    This sounds like a no win situation. Be glad they cannot visit again for a long time!