Posted in Behavior, Toddlers, Working Parents

Need suggestions..

My son turned 1 last week. Looks like he is starting to understand things. Lately he cries whenever I leave for my work. He wants to go with me. Babysitter had to redirect him to let me go. I don't want to leave him like that. I want to give him a proper good bye and leave in front of him rather than hiding and leaving. Is it wrong? I just want him to understand that mom needs to go. What do you all do? How do you do it? Suggestions please. TIA.

  • Katia
    Oct 29, 2018

    We do use distraction otherwise it’s unnecessary crying. I don’t believe they actually understand right now that gone isn’t permanent yet. So once that cognitive understanding is there we will say proper good byes lol but 1 year olds just aren’t there yet.

  • Amber
    Oct 29, 2018

    It’s hard and I am sorry! My 1 year old and I went through this when dad leaves. We had to do distraction. But make sure to say goodbye and don’t hang around long. Make it quick and easy. It gets better I promise. They might cry but remember it doesn’t last all day but we are at the age where a routine is needed. Normal goodbyes, bedtime around the same time. We’re now going in 15 months and it’s a normal thing now. Dad leaves at 6am and comes back at 3.

  • Lauren
    Oct 29, 2018

    We have a 15 month old who started showing separation anxiety around 12 months. Best advice I can give? Make it a short sweet bye! Sometimes it’s better to duck out and them not see you go, than trying to say goodbye and having them watch you leave. Most don’t understand that leaving them isn’t permanently leaving them. It gets easier with time I promise!

  • Lily
    Oct 29, 2018

    I wait until she is having fun playing, than no crying! I don’t think its wrong, because she still doesn’t understand I will be back. Once she can understand I plan on talking to her about, and tell her if she has lots of fun while I am gone I will be back before she knows it.

  • Meriksha
    Oct 29, 2018

    Thanks everyone. Good to hear it all. 😊

  • Grammy
    Nov 13, 2018

    Yes keep your goodbyes short and sweet. Be strong and matter of fact. If you make a big deal out of it, then your child will make a bigger deal out of it in his mind. You are not being dishonest with him by allowing distractions. This is best for him; you are feeling guilty as a Mom. It's natural, but stay strong. Been there, done that.