Posted in Blended Families, Divorce & Separation, Single Parents

Out of state custody

Anonymous

I am looking into moving to another state in order to get away from my daughter’s father- he is really not a safe person. I know I need to be in a new state for 182 days in order to gain jurisdiction there. Does anyone have experience in this type of situation that could offer me advice or pleasant stories (I’m terrified to do this). Much love! Thank you!

  • Anonymous
    May 19

    If you leave without his consent it might legally be considered kidnapping? Maybe talk to a lawyer before taking action, so that you have some legal footing?

  • Anya levonavna
    May 20

    I was in a very similar situation I’m 2012 when I found myself in a toxic marriage with an abusive man. We lived in PA but I was from New York City and still had a lot of strong ties there. I took my two year old son and left in the middle of the night. My husband came several times to try to take our son back but as soon as he would show up I d call the police. I went to the precinct and I spoke to an officer who had experience w domestic violence victims and families . I filed for a temporary order of protection in both states and they were granted and effective immediately. Later I hired an attorney filed for divorce and custody . My attorney had adjourned our hearing and in the interim 6 months had gone by . We had the right to jurisdiction . But you can file for an order of protection and p of a immediately In whatever state you’re in. That will buy you time and keep you safe away from your daughter’s father . Regardless of how he is with her he is abusive to you and you cant have your child around that. leaving was the hardest thing I ever had to do I thought. But now looking back it was the best decision I could have made . I have full physical and primary custody of the child he has visitation unsupervised (3 years of supervised first . I have a new life my kids are happy I don’t walk around in fear anymore . If you have somewhere to go out of state like your parents or a friends go . Or if you can’t go then go to the local police station and talk to them about your situation and how you’d like to learn more About domestic violence. My precinct gave me a packet about DV and it was a blessing . All will work out in the end. don’t let anyone make you feel unsafe . It is your given right to protect the safety of yourself and your children . Good luck

  • Anonymous
    May 24

    Anya, thank you! How did you get jurisdiction? My biggest question now is what do I need to do right away so that I can prove that I have been there 6 months when the time comes?