Posted in Potty Training, Toddlers

Potty Training- How to start?!

So I read the Oh Crap book after I saw it recommended on here, but in practice I don’t think it’s a good fit for my family. So what are the other ways to potty train? You put them on the pot every hour and give them candy if they go? How long do you wait to see if they go? Pull-ups or underwear? (My mom says use pull-ups at least the first week, but he already wears them because he’s big and they fit better). Anything else I should know? Thank so much for your advice, I am clueless lol. (My son is 29 months old btw and def ready to start)

  • Anonymous
    Jun 09

    Just curious, how is the book not a good fit for your family? I agree that her method doesn’t work for all but just wondering which part(s) you are referring to. We used the oh crap method as a guideline. My son is capable of pushing his own pants down and getting on the potty but refuses to do it on his own (figured this out on Day 4). And he also prefers the big potty but will not climb up on his own. So the book helped us get started to help him make the connection and then we had to figure out how HE wanted to approach this. He finished day training in 4 days. He tells us when he has to go some times. Other times I just tell him it’s time to go use the potty and he will go. And I set certain rules in the house - we go before we leave or we go when we get to the destination. We go after meals, before nap/bed, and before bath. After a month of this it’s become routine for him too. No bribes. He just knows that’s where poop and pee goes and he enjoys flushing toilets and watching his pee and poop swirl away down the hole. I would try it without bribes to see if he enjoys flushing. Maybe start with taking him every hour? I used to do that but because my son doesn’t get on the potty himself, my back was getting sore from all the lifting so I kept testing out his pee/poop habits and noticed that he could hold it for 2-2.5 hrs for the first half of the day and then he tanks up on fluids after his nap and I have to take him every hr to 1.5 hrs. Every kid is different though and you should observe their potty habits. No pull ups or training pants. He never used to care about being in a wet or dirty diaper but now he hates just the slightest feeling of being wet! We still put diapers on his for nap and bedtime and we call them his “sleep diapers.” He’s not a fan but he always asks to take them off when he wakes up. He was 28 months when we started. I just heard from too many other moms about pull ups making their kids regress. That one day they just woke up and realized how convenient pull ups are and why should they stop playing to go potty? And after the 4 days of being home, I am not going through that again until kid #2! Not sure what training pants would have been like though.

  • Gloria
    Jun 09

    So he didn’t like being naked. The one time I managed to get him to go bottomless he pooped a small nugget, I brought him to the bathroom, he cried, when we got back the dog had eaten the poop 🤢. We tried to get him to go every hour today and told him he would get candy if he went in the potty but he threw a tantrum every time. He also throws tantrums every time we need to change his diaper 🤷🏻‍♀️ So we ordered a Thomas Train plastic potty that’s coming tomorrow, hopefully that helps. Don’t know what else to do.

  • Lynn
    Jun 09

    Perhaps you can try very small steps. Give lots of praise every single time he tells you he has to go or went and let you know. Whichever he already does. When he does it pretty much as a behavior on his own. Pick the next step. Like if he has to start off at letting you know he went, then move to letting you know first. Then, just going to the bathroom. Then sitting on potty. Then actually using it. With that being said, I have friends that swear by waiting until they are 3 years old. Just those few months older can make a huge difference. If he’s having tantrums for using the potty, then maybe he’s not as ready as he seems.

  • Gloria
    Jun 09

    He loves sitting on the potty and sat on the potty every night last week while I was drawing his bath. So he just doesn’t like us telling him to do it I guess.

  • Gloria
    Jun 09

    But I can’t even get him to that first step. The author of Oh Crap said being able to tell you comes weeks into the potty training.

  • Anonymous
    Jun 09

    Do you let him watch you use the bathroom, see the contents inside and it getting flushed?

  • Gloria
    Jun 09

    Anon, sometimes we let him see. And sometimes I even let him flush! He likes doing that!

  • Anonymous
    Jun 09

    Don’t let him flush. We tell our son that whoever the pee and poop came out of gets to flush. So if he goes then he gets to flush Maybe go bottomless with him while you are home? So he doesn’t feel alone doing it?

  • Anonymous
    Jun 09

    The first step is for them to learn the feeling of going and what’s happening associated with that feeling and where we want to put those contents. That’s why the book suggests being naked so that they see the pee or poop coming out. If he’s really fighting being naked then maybe put some tight bottoms on him so when he pees he knows that feeling before wetting himself and explain to him that he is peeing and that needs to happen on the potty. I think she suggests being naked so that you at least have a chance to grab him and run him to the potty.

  • Julie
    Jun 09

    My daughter also doesn’t like to be naked, at least not all the time. I think in hindsight it just took the right combination of timing and time itself for her to get it. She definitely knows and she knows to come tell me or my husband if she has to pee. She still has accidents but that’s life. If she were willing to go naked she would have fewer of them but she really prefers pants on for the most part. Today she had only one accident and it was because she went to go by herself without telling me and couldn’t pull her pants down so she just sat on the potty with them on, ha. I think that it takes a few weeks or even months for them to realize the association of having to pee and understanding that that means they’re going to urinate. For us, once she figured that out it just got easier from there. I honestly don’t think there’s any magical formula for teaching them that sensation of having to pee means you’re going to go...I think that part they figure out on their own.

  • Gloria
    Jun 09

    Don’t want to do the naked method, so how does one go from diapers to potty training? For those who didn’t use the naked method, what did you do and how did it start?

  • Anonymous
    Jun 09

    The step after naked is loose fitting shorts, why don't you just try from that stage, it's not the same as the diaper, but he still has coverage. The first time I tried with my son was before I got the book and I had underwear on him. He did not mistake them for diapers, and had no problem keeping them dry. My attempt failed when I put a pull up on him to leave the house. They are DIAPERS. And he used it. Then a few days later when he was at home with underwear he would just pee in them and enjoy watching it drip all over the floor. I gave up, waited a month, read the book, and started over. I don't know how how to help with the tantrums except for it needs to seem like his choice when it really isn't. Don't ever ask him if he needs to go, but tell him it's time to go, and maybe give him a choice about where to go i.e. big potty, or Thomas potty. Bring a toy, or bring a book etc.

  • A
    Jun 09

    I would just keep them naked or in underwear whenever we were home and awake. This also meant we spent more time at home than usual, so they could get practice. But if we had to get out of the house I just put them in a pull up. Honestly, I found that once they were really ready - they figured it out pretty quickly. When we were home I made sure to take them to the potty every 30min or so. We also used some bribery ... a gummy bear for every pee in the potty. Lol

  • Lynn
    Jun 09

    Choices. Don’t be afraid to leave the house. I keep a travel potty, bags, and wipes in my car. Before we get in the car seats, I set them on the potty. When we get out of the car, I set them on the potty. If I know we will be out for a long time hiking or something, I put the potty and supplies in my backpack. Putting on pull ups is sort of a regression because it is a diaper and they are trained from birth to pee and poop in one. You can put puppy pee pads in the car seat. They soak up a lot and keep the seat dry. We don’t use sugar to bribe because for potty, we use a lot of positive reinforcement and a token reward system. It works quite well. I give them tokens and they can purchase special time or extra books with the tokens. Like money. You decide how much something costs. Not material goods like a new time. Extra book at bedtime, a walk to the park. One on one time with mommy. Etc.

  • Geena
    Saturday

    Gloria, i just finished one week of potty training my 28 month old toddler and i’d say Oh Crap book helped me get a kick start. He resisted with being naked at first because he’s been in diapers all his life but i distracted him with something to do. I think they can’t do anything else being naked at this time because he can’t just take back a diaper and put it on back. He was commando style for 4 days. First 3 days i was just looking at those tiny bits and his expressions if there’s a body rxn before he pees or poops. I found out he would dance on his feet before pouring it out. He had a lot of accidents first 2 days but i would instantly rush him to the potty when he does begin to pee and he pees there then and gave him lots of praises without bribes. I also tried getting him to potty every whatever minutes but he hated it so i just waited esp if he just finished drinking water. At the 4th day he just went to the potty to pee. Same day he told me he wanted to go to potty to pee and that gave me a shock because i least expect it in a few days. I think staying for days successively helped me a lot. Common accident now is not being able to get a good timing when he wakes up from his nap and i’m still working on those. 5th day he has his loose pants on. One accident and then successive times he’d either tell me he’d go potty or i’d remind him. Exaggerated praises did helped me a lot 🤣 hope you find something that will work successfully for you.