Posted in Money, Stay-at-Home Parents

SAHM feeling unimportant

Anonymous

Before my 10 month old son, I was very financially independent and never relied on anybody for anything. Until I became a stay at home mom. My husband is always very supportive with my decision to stay at home but financially it’s getting difficult. Always having to ask him for money for my and the babies needs makes me feel so worthless. I feel like my decision to be a SAHM has put us in the hole. He works two full time jobs and is so stressed and exhausted trying to bust his butt to support us but I can tell it’s a struggle for him. If I go back to work, I won’t make any income with daycare, taxes and benefits taken out. I feel completely stuck. Has anybody else been in the same situation? Any advice would be much appreciated ❤️❤️

  • Anonymous
    Nov 14

    Is this post more about finances and what to do or is there something else going on about feeling appreciated for what you do at home? Details seem to be about finances but the title of your post suggests otherwise. As far as the finances, I would sit down and budget out what can be spent on needs each month and find out where you can cut costs. My husband and I have our own personal checking accounts but a shared savings account. So when I need to spend money on something, I just take it out of my checking account but take a big amount from the savings account each month to cover those costs. So he doesn’t know what I spend the money on because he trusts me but I also stay within the budget that we had discussed before I became a sahm. As far as getting a job, figure out what pay you need to make in order to be able to bring something in to help out with finances and start searching. I have heard of moms working from home too. So maybe look into that? Just be aware that it is hard to be caring for a baby and working at the same time

  • Anonymous
    Nov 14

    I was in the same boat for a long time. I had never known a time when I was unemployed and not working at least 60 hours a week...until I had a baby. The reality is that since I’m a SAHM, I work 24/7. My husband and I agreed that financially, it was more cost effective for me NOT to have a job. We don’t have a big surplus of cash lying around but we recognize where we can spend money - we love going out to breakfast but generally eat lunches and dinners at home. My husband gave me a separate debit card to use for myself and baby. He says I can just use it on whatever is needed but I still tell him what I’m buying so he is aware and we are communicating about purchases since he is the one putting money into the account. Maybe you could consider a part time remote job depending on your field of interest? Or if you have a great hobby/talent you could create your own Etsy store and sell items?