Posted in Child Care, Single Parents, Toddlers

Security blanket/stuffed animal

Anonymous

So my son is almost 15 months old. We have never spent any time apart. I’m a single mom, he sleeps in my bed, and we go everywhere together. There’s literally never a moment we’re not together. A security blanket/stuffed animal hasn’t been necessary and he hasn’t really taken to anything because I have always been there 24/7. He is going to start a Mother’s Day Out program in the fall 2 days a week and I know he is going to have a hard time being apart from me. Is it too late to introduce a security blanket to help ease his anxiety about being away from me? If not, how do I go about introducing one?

  • anonymous mom
    May 23

    I’m not sure...my daughter is a bit more separated from me in that she is in daycare while I work but she and I are inseparable otherwise. She so far hasn’t taken to any specific blanket, animal, or lovey either. People tell me it’s just something that happens organically and it doesn’t matter if a child is very attached or not, some will find a comfort object that they attach to and some will not. My daughter is 20 months. I had a favorite doll that I snuggled with all the time as a child but I wasn’t given her till I was 3 years old. So maybe your son just needs more time. Also, good luck with the MDO program this fall!!

  • Yanis
    May 23

    I’ve been home with my daughter for 2 years now, we cosleep and just like you and your son have never spent any time apart at all. My husband and I tried to get her to pick something up to help her sleep at night like a plush animal or a blanket, but she never did when we tried to get her to do it. Then one day she picked a little stuffed animal and for months wouldn’t put it down. She did it on her own, the thing got pretty dirty and raggedy so I tried getting her to leave it at home and she wouldn’t lol. Idk if you’ll have any luck; maybe pick something and bring it to bed at night and just keep it around he might get used to it, and use it as security.

  • PK
    May 23

    I don’t think it’s too late. We have always had two security blankets and a few small stuffed animals for our son in the crib but I felt like he didn’t actually get attached to one of his security blankets until around 13 or 14 months. Roughly the time when we started cutting down his pacifier use. As far as introducing one... maybe take him shopping with you or let him pick one out online? When he’s feeling upset you can offer it to him and hug him tight while he is holding it.

  • Emily
    May 23

    My daughter is now 23 months old and I am a SAHM. She isn’t really attached to any security object. A couple of months ago, we started getting a sitter for 4 hrs/day for 2 days per week so I can study, I was wary at first because we hadn’t left her with anyone except my parents for date night (twice). She had a rough start for a couple of those days, but has done so much better after the initial separation. Kids can tell when parents are nervous or anxious about something....so I would try to hide those feelings from him. It’s great that you are able to do a program for him that will give him some autonomy 😃 and more exposure to other kids. I missed the sign up dates for doing that for us 😢😢. So, no advice about a comfort object, just more of a hang in there, it will get better (& my girl did so much better than I thought she would 😃).

  • Anonymous
    May 23

    I don’t think he needs an object to make him feel more comfortable! But maybe let him bring his favorite stuffed animal Incase :)

  • B
    May 23

    I wouldn’t start the habit of an object for any time other than sleep. Most programs don’t let kids bring toys, etc. I think the best thing is to start leaving him for short periods with people he knows. The program be really hard at first but stick with it. Once he bonds with someone he will love it

  • Anonymous
    May 23

    I've lived this same situation.. he will adapt to it! Trust me.. my son did great.. it's only 2 days! Just remind him that you will come back for him and when he sees you come back he will be ok.. maybe buy something now like a little bear and let him see that you love it and treat it as a prized posession.. that way when fall comes around you can give it to him and tell him to keep it safe until you pick him up. He will be old enough to understand by then. You might not think so but he will be. Also name the bear or whatever you choose to get...

  • Anonymous
    May 23

    I disagree with the one above "B"... programs that are designed for kids do let them bring lovies because they know how hard it can be for them.

  • anonymous mom
    May 24

    My daughters school allows comfort objects, a blanket, and pillow from home.

  • Jessica
    May 24

    Do you have a specific body spray or perfume that you typically use? Could you spray it on the stuffed animal or blanket so that it smells like you?

  • Anonymous
    May 25

    I think that’s more of a cross that bridge when you get there.... he might be perfectly fine!

  • Kendall
    May 25

    Agree ^^ my son carries his puppy around day care ALL DAY LONG and they don’t mind a bit. So I also disagree the program wouldn’t allow it, I think it would be ok, especially if he’s new.

  • Jamie
    May 25

    I highly recommend role playing. It makes a huge difference when they know what to expect. Get a stuffed animal and pretend that you and your child are the parents. Drop the stuffed animal off and reassure him and kiss him goodbye. You might even have some activities to pretend that the stuffed animal will do while at MDO and some other stuffed animals to represent the kids. Then, switch roles. You be the kiddo and let your child be mommy or daddy dropping you off so that you can model the behavior you hope your child will have. Then it’s their turn. Keep playing until it’s really familiar. This works for the doctor, dentist, play dates, etc. Hope it goes well! ❤️