Anonymous

Unwanted baby name input...

My husband and I didn’t tell anyone what we were going to name our baby until after he arrived (partially due to the fact that we hadn’t decided yet). Now that I’m pregnant with baby #2, I’ve been more open when his family asks what our name options are... they’re pretty verbal about what they like and don’t like... and I keep finding myself getting offended. How should I respond to their scoffs? Or when they ask? I don’t want to come off mean... but both of us have never wanted their advice or input so idk why they feel the need to give it.

  • CrazyEmmaDaisey
    Mar 21

    You can’t change people yet you can change your reaction. Ask questions like why would they think that was a name they thought y’all would like. Teach them your lesson likes/dislikes each time. Help them get on the same page as you. Might even make for a closer relationship (if desired).

  • Anna
    Mar 21

    It’s hard not to take it personally, but different people like different names and everyone seems to have an opinion on them. I think if they are blatantly rude about it, you are free to say something to the effect of, “I understand everyone likes different names, and you don’t like this one. But we do like it, so it is still going to be on the list.” Being firm, but kind is a good way to deal with it. And honestly, after everything, whenever the child is born and has the name you’ve given it, no one will ever be able to imagine him or her by any other name (“A rose by any other name...” 😜)

  • Cathy
    Mar 21

    I’d just stop sharing. People will give input whether you like it or not or want it or not. It’s honestly not worth you getting offended and it’s none of their business anyways!

  • Anonymous
    Mar 21

    My rule is if you don’t want input on your name, don’t share it. People always will.

  • Olivia
    Mar 21

    The whole giving pregnant women advice/opinions thing baffles me. Why are so many people guilty of it? Ugh. My mother's response to the name we chose for our daughter was "oh, that's interesting" and I tease her about it often now that the name fits our little one perfectly. I found a pregnancy shirt (I think from Cafe Press) that said "my mom doesn't want your unsolicited advice" and I wore it often. I think it's absolutely appropriate to preface your chosen name with "I'll share the name with you as long as you understand that we're not asking for opinions or advice on the topic". Try to stop it before it starts. That way you can avoid unnecessary annoyance. On the bright side, you're pregnant and have a bit more leniency to be snarky - people expect it...at least they did from me 😂

  • MamaNukesYopolo
    Mar 21

    I personally shared the names we were thinking of (we never find out gender, so we always have the “pleasure” of sharing two potentials). With the main intention of warning my in laws and even parents of here’s what we’re thinking. Start getting used to it if you don’t like it. I never say it like that, but when I think of my intent being that, instead of getting their input, I’m doing them a favor instead of worrying about their opinion. Don’t know if that helps at all but it’s helps me not be bothering when I get weird looks or sounds from them.

  • Laura Jane
    Mar 22

    :) Your baby will have a beautiful name! I’ve never been a fan of unsolicited advice either. With saying that, tuning out the noise from family is difficult. Interest is appreciated but the deeply personal choice is yours 💜.

  • Stacey
    Mar 22

    My mom and sister hated our son's name when we chose it (Ronan) but they came around. We told them we liked it and he is our baby. To be honest I don't think they heard it correctly the first time.

  • Mark
    Mar 28

    We made up fake names that were so obnoxious, that it disarmed them. I also told many people they did not have review privileges.