Anonymous

Want to breastfeed

My baby is about 4 and a half months and initially, I tried to breastfeed, but I just couldn't lactate. I even tried pumping and it seemed like I pumped for nothing. I feel I lost a bond with my baby because I didn't breastfeed and I was even shamed for it! I really want to know if anyone has tried to relactate and what worked. My baby has a cows milk allergy that is found in normal formula so he is on a special one but it's getting pricey. I really want to breastfeed but I dont know if I will be able to produce.

  • Carly
    Dec 04

    Talk to your doc. There were medications available through pharmacies in Canada or Mexico (not US). My kiddo has cow milk allergy too. It's expensive, but go for the generic when you can. It gets easier once they start transitioning to real food. I wasn't able to produce either, and gave up trying at 3 months (pumped several times a day for about one bottle). The most important thing is you are feeding your baby. There is a bond there. It will continue to grow. Please don't think the only way to bond is through breastfeeding. Being there every day for your baby will build that bond.

  • Carolyn
    Dec 04

    You may also seek out the advice of an IBCLC. Some doctors are not very aware of breastfeeding stuff and may not know how to help you. I have heard of people being able to lactate even with adoptions so I would think it'd be possible.

  • Anonymous
    Dec 04

    Carly- Thanks! I know it's not he only way to bond. It just feels that way specially because I had a csection and wasn't able to hold my baby right away so that also weighs on me that I missed that instant bond. If that makes sense and not being able to breastfeed made it more difficult for myself.

  • Jackie
    Dec 04

    I also had a csection and couldn’t breast feed either. I made sure we did a good amount of skin to skin especially in the first few weeks. I also held her close when feeding and tried to make eye contact, smile and talk to her while feeding. She’s 5 months now and the way she looks at me with so much love absolutely melts my heart! I would get in contact with a lactation specialist and see if they can help. You are doing amazing and don’t ever feel shamed! You’ve got this! :)

  • Valerie
    Dec 04

    You’re doing great. I was in the same boat as you and had many similar emotions and comments from others about not breastfeeding. As someone else said, hold baby close, look into her eyes as you bottle feed her, do skin to skin, and be confident in the knowledge that you did your best. Let go of the guilt. The medication that you can get from Canada is called domperidone. It has some side effects like hunger and weight gain. Some women respond very well, others just gain weight and have a little more milk production. If you’re pumping with minimal output, you could be using the wrong flange size. I didn’t know any different and used the flanges that the hospital gave me. They were far too big for me and caused tissue damage to my breasts as my entire areola was being sucked into the flange. Having never watched anyone pumping before in any detail, I had no clue that what was happening was not what should have happened. An ill fitting flange WILL severely impact your milk supply. Know better, do better.

  • Anonymous
    Dec 05

    Valerie- Thank you! I have seen 3 different lactation specialist so all the pump supplies are correctly sized. I will continue the skin to skin. I stopped pumping because I just wasnt getting anything more than a drop. But I want to start trying again maybe I could relactate

  • Brea
    Dec 05

    First of all. Don’t feel bad if you can’t breastfeed. My doctor said to me that his son is adopted and had been formula fed. He doesn’t have any bonding issue or development issue at all. I didn’t start lactating until 3 months. I just couldn’t bare the pain. And I didn’t know how to properly pump. Eventually after many trials, the milk started to come out. Little by little.