Posted in Marriage & Partnership, Babies

What do I do if I’ve tried everything and my partner still complains about having to stay with baby!

Partner works full time I work 14-16 hrs a week. The days I work I have a babysitter who stays for a few hours until he gets home. He stays maybe 4 hrs alone with him if not less. He always complains about having to stay with baby because he is tired. Last week was the last time I lost my nerve. I put the baby to sleep and I went to the store for formula (mind you it was to get formula I was maybe gone about 40 mins.) he calls me saying baby is crying doesn’t want to sleep. When I got home baby was asleep and he was on the couch nagging about having to “rock him back to sleep” . I am seriously considering leaving and becoming a single parent because this is absurd !

  • Jackie
    May 23

    Yeah that is not acceptable. He is the parent, not a babysitter. I mean he needs to realize that parenting is a never ending job and you are doing the majority of the parenting work during the days and that is absolutely work!! You pay a babysitter to watch your kids, they’re working, so why isn’t it considered working for you to be watching the kiddo? If you take that into consideration, you’re working way more than 14-16 hours a week! Kids are the PARENTS’ responsibility, NOT the mom’s.

  • First time mommy
    May 23

    Thank you I feel like I am losing my mind

  • First time mommy
    May 23

    We have had tons of discussions yet no improvement at this point my hands are tied I am not gonna teach a grown ass man how to raise / take care of his own child.

  • Anonymous
    May 23

    Then make sure you are financially ready to be a single parent. Also, it’ll be better if you have friends, family etc. to help out and you might possibly need to look for a day care for your child. Think about these possibilities and stuff if you are at your wits ends with your partner.

  • B
    May 23

    Talk to him about it at a time he isn’t upset. Tell him parents take care of their children even when tired and you expect him to do 50% of the work. If he can’t handle that, why did he have a child. Be honest and listen to what he says. Ask about why he doesn’t like watching the baby and what solution he proposes.

  • Jackie
    May 24

    I am in the same boat as you. My husband has a 9 year old as well. We have every other sunday, every mon-thur after school and have sleepovers 2-3 nights a week. My husband and I both work 40 hours with opposite days off so we have child care coverage for our 11 month old. When I come home from working a 10hr shift and picking up my stepson from school I have about 30mins before the baby wakes up from her last nap of the day. Once she wakes I take on all responsibility of her while my husband only spends time with his son. My husband needs to sit in the same room while he does homework or does it with him, they do baseball almost every night of the week and then he has to be upstairs when his son takes a shower. It’s really annoying that he is 9 years old and can’t do anything himself and I have absolutely no free time. Ugh I literally feel like a single parent and that my husband is a glorified babysitter!! We just had a HUGE fight about this.

  • First time mommy
    May 24

    It’s so unfair that all responsibilities suddenly fall on us woman it actually makes me feel as if I have a grown up son. I hope and wish things get better for you. I don’t want to keep nagging about this but I am done bending over backwards for someone who isn’t responsible. Stay strong for your baby one day it will all turn out great! Sending hugs !

  • Charry
    Friday

    I am currently reading/listening to How not to hate you f* husband after kids.