Anonymous

Words of encouragement from c-section mamas

Can't help but feel a little disappointed (also read scared) about having to have a scheduled c section (next Monday). Husband and I discussed and decided on natural birth long before I was pregnant. Baby is measure at 9 pounds so I understand, but maybe just coming from a place of discomfort/unfamiliar with surgery and being in a hospital. Any support/encouragement/uplifting stories would be appreciated! Happy Mother's Day to everyone 💓

  • MamaNukesYopolo
    May 08, 2018

    Can’t edit above post, but when I say emergency c section I mean,they sprinted me into the OR, my husband couldn’t be in and I couldn’t be awake, lights were flashing and doors auto opening super scary.

  • Anonymous
    May 08, 2018

    I had to have an emergency c section and honestly I was devastated. I wanted so badly to have a natural birth and I'm still really disappointed about it. With that being said, I can say that if I knew and if I was prepared for what was going to happen I certainly wouldn't feel this way. Talk with your doctor and have them explain step by step what you will be experiencing that day. Knowing what will happen can really calm nerves. Remember to ALWAYS speak up if you are uncomfortable, scared, confused. You need to ask anything that comes to mind so you can be at ease. Looking back I know I didn't speak up and I wish I would have. I was treated so poorly. They pulled out my son (didn't show me) and then pulled my husband away to cut the cord all while I was just laying there alone for a good 10 min.... I was so sad and jealous. The recovery wasn't as bad as I thought or expected. Even hearing others stories scared me but I was up and walking that night. Maybe because I'm younger? (24). Or I have a good pain tolerance? Not sure. I kept to my med schedule like clock work so I would never find myself in pain! That's a MUST. If you're nursing definitely talk about comfy positions. Laying down was the only way I could nurse for a couple days. And make sure you have support! Thank god I had my mom and husband. I pretty much just nursed and slept for about 5 days which helped so much with healing, they did the rest. Some of my girlfriends who have torn w vaginal deliveries had it waaaaay worse than I did! So it's for sure different for everyone. Just like with any type of delivery it's always WORTH IT ❤️

  • Jessica
    May 08, 2018

    Best thing I did. My son was an early emergency c section. A few words of advice go into it with a good attitude and you will have a better result. A lot of it can be you stressing your self out. A healthy happy baby is the goal. Second piece of advice.. start walking as soon as you can.. get in that hall and walk a bit about 30 minutes after you had your pain meds. I had one of the best recoveries... as much as I wanted to be in bed I had a reason to walk.. it was slow and painful but I was doing it. Also get high waisted leggings it made me feel more secure and better to be out of a hospital gown. You can do it.. you just grew a human .. a c section is nothing. And don't be disappointed because if any one who had a natural birth makes you feel bad .. well they have a messed up woohah and dont feel bad for reminding them that

  • Katelyn
    May 08, 2018

    I don't want to make this too long. Which ever way you give birth, in the end you'll have a precious baby. I wish those who've had c-section didn't feel so shamed but whatever is best for baby AND mom. Tips for recovery: get to moving as soon as possible, it seems to make recovery go faster. And don't be afraid to tell someone if something doesn't feel right. Surgery is scary but it's just a blip in so many happy memories afterward. Good luck and I hope all goes well. Happy Mother's Day!

  • Breanna
    May 08, 2018

    It's completely normal to feel nervous and disappointed. I'm a petite woman so after 3 hours of pushing they decided I wasn't making enough progress and we decided to do a c-section over the vacuum since the doctor said he wasn't too optimistic of it working anyways. Once we were in the OR my daughter's HR was down in the 60s so it turned into an emergency c-section. Yours will be a lot less scary since it's planned, but you also have more time to think about it and prepare. I had about 20 minutes to digest what was happening. I definitely bawled my eyes out for a good amount of time. When you're in the OR just relax and trust that the doctor know a what's they're doing. You can request that they keep you updated or tell you very little. For recovery just know that you will not be able to use your ab muscles for about a month afterwards. You'll need help getting out of bed the first couple days, you won't even have the core strength to roll onto your side either. When I went home I was worried about how I was going to get out of bed! I had to roll on to my side as far as I could and swing my legs around and then push with my arms to get myself up. It was very impressive when I could finally sit straight up from laying down in bed. lol You'll do great! Just make sure you have plenty of support at the hospital and at home for 2 weeks at least. Overall it was a good experience and I'm considering scheduling a c-section for my next baby instead of trying a vbac since I was too small to push out 7lb baby. lol

  • Heather
    May 08, 2018

    I had to have a scheduled C-section for my son because he was breech. I also have always been terrified of having surgery. Let me tell you, the actual surgery was a breeze. One thing that helped me was the anesthesiologist told me what was happening as my doctor operated. I was amazed to find out that I was already halfway through the major cuts. I hadn't felt anything! I think knowing the progress helped put me at ease. For me, recovery was not as easy because I was afraid to get up and walk, so yes, do that! If I had tried for a vaginal birth, I would have ended up with an emergency C-section anyway because the cord was wrapped around his neck twice, so whatever the reason for you needing the C-section, know you are doing what's best for you and baby!

  • Desiree
    May 08, 2018

    My first was emergency and my second was planned. Make sure you get that abdominal binder. Speak up and ask those nurses for one if they don’t offer it. Take your pain meds on time to stay ahead of the pain. Make sure you have help for a good 2-3 weeks after. Help for everything laundry cooking cleaning other children. Give yourself plenty of time to heal. Trying to rush the healing process can and will backfire so be sure to enjoy that baby and heal. Best of luck!

  • Anonymous
    May 08, 2018

    BEST DECISION I MADE. We weren't scheduled to have a c-section, but when our all-natural home birth wasn't going as planned, I elected to have a c-section bc it was the right/smartest medical decision for me. Although I had *so many* fears and was very against c-section, it turned out to be the one thing that was good my whole entire pregnancy! - NO TEARING (i know lots and lots of ppl who ended up with 3rd degree tears, episiotomies, etc. In my case, once the OB got in there, she said that, had I not elected to have the csection, I would have had a min 3rd degree tear!) - my csection line is pencil thin! - You may have a better recovery than you expect. In my case, I had a fantastic surgeon, and I was up and on the go immediately (as in, 2 hrs after the procedure). I recovered far, far faster than any of my friends who delivered naturally. By day 4 or so, I was on just advil, going to the store w hubby, etc (walking slowly and gingerly, but I was up and out of the house!). By wk 2 or 3, I forgotten about the csection almost entirely. - Less bleeding/lochia than natural birth (the surgeon can remove a lot of the tissue before s/he closes up). - SEX! SEX! SEX! This is a majorly important one. No damage to your reproductive organs is SO important. Lots of ppl who deliver vaginally say sex is unfomfortable or painful until month 7 or even a year post-delivery. And ending up getting a csection after unsuccessfully pushing is the worse case scenario. Skip all that nonesense w a csection and avoid the trauma to the vagina and cervix. I had no idea about this one ahead of time, and boy am I soooo thankful! We were ready to go faaar before the 4-6wk dr approval, and I can say that orgasms *really really helped* kill off those baby blues post-delivery! #lotsoforgasms #thankyouocytocin Two things that I would suggest: ** We elected for a NERVE BLOCK and NOT an EPIDURAL. research and talk through these options through with your anaesthesiologist. The block has lower risk of side effects and the administration is a little different (safer). You can get whichever one you want. ** Pre-emptively take stool softeners. The narcotics in the epi or block can wreak havoc on your bowels. Theyll offer you a stool softener after surgery, but that'll only work on food going forward, not anything left in your body from before the fasting window. ... And if none of that brings a smile to your face, remember: your kiddo will have a less jacked-up-looking pointy head. :) You'll rock this! Keep us posted, and let us know if you need any after-csection tips & tricks.

  • Aida
    May 08, 2018

    Similar story as those already mentioned, I was 2 weeks late with estimates of baby being almost 10 lbs. Was induced, 20 hour labor and only dilated to 5. So ended up with emergency C-section, by that point I was exhausted and just wanted to meet our baby. Didn’t feel anything, but will never forget that sound when I heard him. One thing I will add, having had to do the surgery really gave a chance for my husband to be more hands on and bond with baby, something I think some times is missed because we as moms step in to take care of everything. The nurses were really good about teaching him and kept mentioning “mom needs time to recover and focus on breastfeeding. Dad needs to do the rest.” The extra time in hospital was also great, gave us time to ask all the questions we wanted with experts on hand. Good luck and have a wonderful relaxing Mother’s Day!

  • Kristin
    May 08, 2018

    I too have an unplanned c section as my baby was overdue almost 2 weeks & I won’t go into labor. I was induced & tried almost everything, walking at the hospital hallways, birthing ball, squatting, etc for more than 24hrs. Finally the doctor decided to do c section just to get out my baby before the amniotic fluid gets too low. All my husband & I were thinking & what our family & doctor says is soon our baby will be with us & that made me stronger to do all of it & made me excited & happy knowing I’ll hold my baby soon. At the very moment that you’re about to give birth, you’ll have all the strength you never knew you have because you love your baby.

  • Anonymous
    May 08, 2018

    You ladies are amazing, these responses have made me feel way more at peace and prepared for everything. Thank you so so much ❤️

  • Kelsey
    May 08, 2018

    i had an emergency c section. i never really cared which way my daughter came out as long as she was healthy and ok thats all that mattered to me. i was going to give the natural thing a shot but it didnt work out, her heart rate kept dropping and i was so scared. but here were are 15 months later and shes running around putting on my slippers. lol. its definitely normal to feel the way you are especially with so many people out there negatively judging c sections. but all that matters is that baby coming into this world safely for the both of you. i hope all goes well. try to be as comfortable as possible and get as much rest as you can. the recovery definitely one of the hardest parts. stay strong!

  • Andrea
    May 08, 2018

    Definitely research Gentle C-Section. I had an emergency c section with my first after a failed induction led to a prolapsed cord. 2nd one tried for a VBAC, but I didn’t go into labor so we scheduled. What a world of difference. First off, much much easier recovery with scheduled. Turns out not contracting on pitocin for 20 hours makes recovery way less awful. Also, first was rush job to get him out and safe. I felt similarly to previous poster in that I felt like once he was born, I didn’t get to see him for like 10 minutes and I didn’t get to hold him for almost an hour until I was in recovery. With my 2nd, I talked to my doc about a gentle c section. They were able to lower the screen as he was being taken out so I actually saw him as he was born, my hands weren’t tied down to the table and best of all, they just did quick evaluation and then gave him to me for skin to skin. I held him the entire time that they stitched me up, and boy, let me tell you, that was so wonderful. I felt way more connected the 2nd time, and for many reasons, but being able to plan ahead of time really just made it so much more humane. Whatever happens, take care of yourself, love on that baby, and remember that you got this!

  • Anonymous
    May 09, 2018

    After my baby was a week overdue, I had an induction on a Friday. It failed and I ended up with a c-section on Monday. It would have been far easier to have had a scheduled one than to have not slept for 3 days and having been jacked up on pitocin!

  • Nina
    May 09, 2018

    After 32 hours of labor, we ended up having an emergency c-section due to a combination of baby’s heart rate and cervix. My cervix dilated to 9.5 (so close!) after pitocin and my poor son, every time I had a contraction, his head was getting squeezed, which would cause his heart rate to drop a bit. I knew there was a possibility that I would have a c-section since my mom had a c-section with me. The story with my mom was that her cervix could only dilate to a certain number and if I weighed anymore than 6 pounds, she would be undergoing a c-section (and, of course, I was over 6 pounds). My doctor and I hoped for a vaginal birth but it just didn’t work out. I even tried pushing to see if the last .5 of my cervix would budge but to no luck. As quite a few people have already mentioned, at the end of it all, as long as your baby and you are healthy, that’s all that matters. Even though I knew in the back of my mind a c-section was a possibility for me, I was still scared out of my mind when I was told it was going to happen. The first thing I did was tell the doctor that I needed time (and she looked at me like I was insane). I ultimately needed time to make sure both my husband and I were in the mindset that although things weren’t going as planned, we needed to be mentally strong for this. This was my first surgery ever. The second thing I did was call my mom and ask her to come to the hospital because I was that scared. The surgery itself wasn’t terrible, considering I was already hopped up on an epidural and I was given additional anesthesia. My husband and the anesthesiologist stayed with me the whole time (on the other side of the shield), explaining to me what was going on. My anesthesiologist was great; she answered any questions I had and even distracted me with stories about her kids wanting a dog. A few minutes later, I heard my son cry and it was the most beautiful thing I heard. I knew he was breathing and he was in the world. Whatever the recovery was would be worth it because my precious baby was safe. Thankfully, my recovery has been amazing. We ended up being at the hospital for a total of four days. The first time walking is the hardest part but just take it slow, it isn’t a marathon. My first steps were to go to the bathroom, lol. My nurse and husband watched me like a hawk to make sure I was okay, and thankfully I was. We pushed our son in his little bassinet around the hospital floor to get me up and moving. The nurses were so supportive in seeing me on the move. The nursing staff was also great on making sure I was taking my medication on time. A little over three weeks later and I’m still feeling good. I actually had to visit my doctor yesterday because there was a small superficial tear at the incision, which was causing some fluid to weep. It was an easy enough fix, just a couple of steri-strips to give some additional support to the area. But other than that, the incision is healing beautifully and there was no actual damage to where the stitches are/were. I’m still taking it relatively easy (I was on no driving/no lifting/no dog walking/no stroller pushing for two weeks) but I’ve started to pick up some activity (which oddly enough may have been the cause of the tear). It’s easier said than done, but just focus on having your beautiful baby in your arms in a safe manner. I hope all goes well and you’ve got this!

  • Shruti
    May 09, 2018

    Words of encouragement from a mama who just gave birth 4 days ago. I have a 3 year old and a 4 day old. My first was a "normal" delivery. Forceps and episiotomy pretty much made my life beyond miserable. It hurt to sit, stand, walk, lie down...everything. My stitches took for ever to heal. It took me 5 months to walk a block comfortably. I landed up getting depressed and did not bond with my baby till he was about 9 months. Every time I went back to my OB for a follow-up she kept saying that C-section would have been a much better option and easier recovery. It was a traumatic enough that we decided to put off our next pregnancy for a couple of years. When I got pregnant with my second one, all I worried was about postpartum recovery..my OB had me speak to a mental health professional. I begged my OB for a scheduled c-section..every visit! Although I knew that it was not a possibility cos I had no valid medical reason. She instead offered a scheduled induction saying that we'd have better control of labor. I had no other option. I did not need an episiotomy this time but I do have second degree tears...and im told that tears heal faster than episiotomy. I'm dealing with it a lot better since I know what to expect. Taking it one day at a time. Everybody's story is different...some women have better outcomes with csection and others with normal. All that matters in the end is a happy healthy mama and a happy healthy baby...keep your eyes on the prize!

  • Michelle
    May 09, 2018

    I had three births , two natural one scheduled c section my scheduled c section was amazing ! Pain free healed quick!!

  • Rebecca
    May 10, 2018

    I would not trade my c section for a vaginal birth. The trick is to take your pain meds exactly as prescribed. Don’t give the pain a chance to kick in. The only time I felt discomfort was when I would get up from lying flat or turn over. Take loose comfortable soft clothes and underwear to the hospital. Within two weeks I was up and running as usual. Good luck!

  • Teresa
    May 13, 2018

    I had a great planned schedule c section for medical reasons. I had a date set, but when into labor before my schedule date. Arrived at the hospital in labor, my prenatal had my c section plan, my physician was called and away to the OR we went. I got a spinal and it felt like a pinch and I could feel the cold medicine going in. They OR staffed prepped me for the C section while I talked with my nurse and anesthesiologist. When they were ready my doctor and husband came in to sit by side. I got to have a clear drape, so I could see the baby being born. After the baby was born, the nurse brought the baby around for me to see and have some skin to skin time. Then the baby went to the warmer for care. I was very take charge of my own care without being overbearing on the staff. I had certain expectations and just asked. I was starting to get nauseous when the doctor was closing me up, I asked for Zofran. Because I know Phenergan makes me very sleepy. Also I asked not to be sedated when the doctor are closing me up. So doctors do and others may not. The doctor and anesthesia agreed. From start to finish, everything took less than one hour. By the time I got rolled back to my room, I was ready for visitors and started breastfeeding. Tips: - Ask lots of questions; there is no such thing as a stupid question - Take some Milk of magnesium before your schedule date and have a good BM, because all the drugs will make you constipated. And take stool softeners afterwards. - Don’t let the pain meds wear off or try to tough it out. - Also space out your meds, so you always have something available every 4-6 hours. - Drink lots of fluid and eat something as soon as you feel up to it (I had some chicken broth and Mac & cheese after I got to my room) - I used Depends Silhouette for my postpartum bleeding, instead of the mesh underwear with the large thick pad. - For the next three days at the hospital I lived in my nursing tank top, robe, and my Depends. I did not wear pants unless I walked the halls. - Get up to walk as soon as you feel up to it. The sooner the better. - To get out of bed, roll on to your side on push yourself up using your arms Wish you the best of luck!

  • Kristen
    May 21, 2018

    The important thing is that your baby is alive and well. Vaginal birth versus C-section really makes no difference you are still an amazing woman. Also you get two weeks longer on maternity leave I believe which is awesome