Self Care

Take care of your child by taking care of yourself. Every parent needs a reminder to put their own needs first sometimes.

Share tips and get advice on taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health and looking and feeling your best as a parent.

Anxiety

Does anyone have kids with anxiety- how do you handle/deal with it? Help them deal with it?

  • Lanna
    Thursday

    Yes, i definitely do. My family has a history of anxiety. I was deathly afraid that my son would get it, and i believe he has!! I deal with it, (when need be) just like yourself would! Right now, actually- i have been trying a new way lately, and just staying more like; cool, calm & collected about the situation, I’ve also been trying to be more patient... and explain things to him a lot be... More

How often do you check your blood pressure?

Moms who have had issues with blood pressure or have a blood pressure cuff of their own how often do you check? I had issues at the end of my first pregnancy with my blood pressure and I’m currently having issues with swelling.

  • PK
    Wednesday

    During my pregnancy, I only got it checked when I went to the dr. Postpartum, my bp was really high so we bought a cuff and I think I checked it once a week. I was so swollen that I had trouble breathing. Ended up going to the ER. For some reason my body wasn’t getting rid of all the fluid I retained during my pregnancy/labor/delivery fast enough so it was starting to go into my lungs. My bp ha... More

Anonymous posted in Parent's Health Apr 16

Is there a way to figure out where you are in your cycle after having a hysterectomy?

I don’t get a period anymore, but would like to know where I’m at in my cycle so that I can figure out my moods and see them coming better

  • Anonymous
    Yesterday

    I don’t know if this helps, but the Kindara app is free (for tracking periods/ovulation). It also has different symbols for protected, unprotected, and withdrawal sex aside from a standard marker for your period. You could use that (or the different discharge options that also populate your fertile window) to track your moods...ex mark a period day anytime you have a particularly bad day and ... More

Alone time

This my 1st time posting. I’m a father to a 4 year and a 1 year old, ever since our kids were born they have been attached. I know kids want to spend time with their parents, but sometimes my wife and I just want quality time . Even if it’s just for a night. Any ideas on getting the kids to be more independent? I hope this doesn’t sound selfish of us

  • PK
    Apr 15

    Not selfish at all. How are they with a babysitter?

  • Anonymous
    Tuesday

    Well if they get along, have them watch a movie they like & tell the 4 yo to spend some time with his little sibling. We do that with ours but mine is 11, 7 & 2 so they help out a lot in the “entertaining” the smallest sense🤣 Sometimes it gets so stressful, I need a break.

Anonymous posted in Behavior Apr 14

My child only wants me to hold him for naps

At bedtime we cuddle but he will let me put him down. I just want my own mommy time while he’s napping. Anybody else?

  • Kristen
    Thursday

    I had a snuggle buddy for naps too. Sometimes he will let me use a carrier while he naps which helps. In the last few weeks, we’ve been able to use a swing instead after he gets really sleepy. We also started swaddling for naps as well as at night, which definitely helped.

Any women who had a C section have sex before the 6weeks?

  • Michaela
    Apr 14

    I wish I had felt that way! I would be careful or gentle because it can get infected, or even try “other ways” lol. You could always call your nurse line.

  • Karen
    Apr 14

    I did after almost 4 weeks and didn't have any problems at all. We were just very careful.

Anonymous posted in Mental Health Apr 13

Am I the only mom who is still tired and exhausted all the time 3 years later after giving birth!

I have a 3 year old and I have been exhausted since the moment I gave birth. I'm always tired and sleepy. When time permits it on my days off from work I will sleep 9-10 hours through the night but even then I feel exhausted. Does this feeling of exhaustion ever go away and when?

  • Teddy
    Saturday

    Two things I wanted to note: First: everybody is right about motherhood just being F-big exhausting no matter how much sleep you’re getting. Second : Get that blood work done ASAP. It is super common for you to have some vitamin deficiencies or maybe anemia. Sleep can’t cure any of that. Somebody else mentioned it, but you need to request that they check your ferritin levels when they do your ... More

  • Sarah
    Saturday

    I have had many struggles with my exhaustion since 2008 when I had my firstborn. After 4 children, I still found that nothing was getting any better, and I started to feel lost as a person, like I would never even get close to who I once was, or aspired to be. I decided to become a stay at home mom in Sept of 2017 and it almost seemed worse. I am posting this, because it truly, sincerely helped... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Apr 12

Differences in sexual desire?

My husband and I have always been a little switched from the stereotypical couple. I’m the one who constantly wants sex, and my husband doesn’t feel that it’s as important as other things in a marriage. In my personal opinion, a sexless marriage isn’t a marriage. For me, sex is a way to gauge how we are as a couple. If things are good, and we are communicating well and relatively content, we ar... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 12

    We are the same way.. I have a higher sex drive than my husband’s. I used to get frustrated with my husband if we didn’t have sex at least twice a week. I don’t expect him to have the energy for it during his work week since he has a strenuous job. But let’s back up a bit and look back at what you said.. a “sexless marriage isn’t a marriage at all.” Are you guys not having sex at all? Sex is ... More

  • jxn8tors
    Apr 12

    Have his testosterone checked.

Birth Control.

So i got my IUD in September of 2016 and I just took it out on the 5th of this month because my husband and I are going to start trying again..my question is how long should I be bleeding? I’m going on day 5 and I am starting to get super irritated. It’s heavy and nasty, I know that the IUD regulates my period to every other month and it was only 3 days long and now it is gone so should I expec... More

Anonymous posted in Parent's Health Apr 07

Tummy Troubles from Iron

My doctor recommended an iron supplement, so I took the first one with dinner yesterday. Today, around 3pm, I started having bad lower stomach/abdoninal pains. The doctor warned me that it may cause constipation, so I thought it was that. Then I began having diarrehea. I feel like I have the flu. The pains come and go but I'm still experiencing this at 10pm. Has this happened to anyone? Upo... More

  • Christa
    Apr 07

    Totally normal actually. My prenatal pills my Midwife put me on are the same way, and it takes about a week to adjust to the iron levels being switched. Mine when I first started them, went from zero to Bridesmaid moment- where she shits her pants in the wedding dress in the street- like it came out of now where. Granted I made it- but barely. So I get you! Lol, it SUCKS! But it does get better... More

Anonymous posted in Parent's Health Apr 05

Deep regrets after breast surgery

Two months after breastfeeding my second for nearly two years, I rushed for breast enlargement surgery. My husband didn’t want it, the two friends I spoke with also disagreed, but I went and did it and now am full of shame and regret. I was trying to claw back a little of the body confidence I had before my body and breasts stretched and sagged. 3 days post-op, I look like I have one of those... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 06

    Anon, I’ve been thinking about you today. It’s so heartbreaking to hear you talk about yourself this way. As mothers we put ourselves through hell to have children. You breastfed for TWO YEARS. That is a huge, huge personal and physical sacrifice to make for your family. Your desire to regain some of your former shape and confidence after that is SO SO understandable. I hear that you regret t... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 08

    Thank you Anon. For your comforting and encouraging words. I am slowly stepping away from the extreme self-hate and blame. Have channelled some of my anger at the medical professionals who thought nothing of operating on someone in a somewhat vulnerable position; I calculated having only stopped breastfeeding 5 weeks before operation, plus two emergency c-sections in two years. I’d actually me... More

Depression?

My son is nine and doesn’t want to leave the house. Not only that but he doesn’t want to play with toys, hang out with friends and is a lot more withdrawn than usual. This is a very new thing going on with him but he also suffers from anxiety. I feel like he’s depressed, what do you think? Should I bring him to a doctor? Therapist?

  • Rebecca
    Apr 07

    Hi. I am a LCSW. Definitely would check with your pediatrician first. When these are signs of depression, it usually presents a bit different in children with more behavior and irritability. Lots of possibilities could be considered. I would try just talking with him seeing what he may say about the difference in his behavior and also would definitely check with dr and maybe also set up a th... More

  • Rachel
    Apr 11

    I’m a clinical psychologist and an expert in child and adolescent depression. These are certainly signs of depression, and I would recommend making an appointment with a child psychologist to have him evaluated. I do not recommend play therapy as there is no empirical evidence of its effectiveness. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a better option for a 9-year-old. There are a ton of great resour... More

Anxiety about death

Recently, my own Dad has been facing some health issues. Very serious. I’ve been reflecting on loss, grief, “what-ifs,” and most importantly my own death. It fills me with such heartache at the thought of losing my own parents, but also should something happen to me or my husband. Is this normal? Does anyone else think about the loss of themselves and how it would impact their family? Every c... More

  • Bee
    Tuesday

    I found that becoming a parent instantly jettisoned me into all types of fears, mostly surrounding my children's wellbeing, but it seems your fear of death is directly tied to that. Honestly, I think it's pretty normal, but I'd still be on the lookout for anything that's keeping you from functioning "normally" (whatever that means for you).

  • Ana-Maria
    Tuesday

    I agree that it‘s a common theme after becoming a parent (or maybe mother). Its good to share your concerns, your fears with other mothers who are going through a similar experience. The fact that there are others out there feeling what you feel might hopefully make the hardship more bearable. and can we all please practice honesty about our experiences as mothers and once and for all demystify... More

Krystal posted in Parties Apr 04

Wedding guest colors

So, I'm attending a wedding soon. I know the traditional rules are to not wear white so I selected a pink sheath. However, I recently found out from the brides mother that the wedding dress is actually a blush pink... the same shade as my sheath. Would it still be appropriate to wear? Or should I return it?

  • Mama
    Apr 10

    I wouldn’t wear it. The bride picked that color to be unique 🤷🏽‍♀️ sorry 😖

  • Erin
    Apr 11

    I feel like it’s not expected of you to know that info. There will likely be a lot of blush pink dresses there...

Sara posted in Fitness Apr 03

Beware of the Britax BOB jogging stroller

Crazy read about how this stroller should have been recalled long ago after the front wheel kept falling off. I actually have this stroller but never got around to using it. Now I feel lucky I was lazy! https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/after-hundreds-of-crashes-this-britax-jogging-stroller-faced-recall-then-trump-appointees-stepped-in/2019/04/02/faf23c20-4c06-11e9-b79a-961983b7e0... More

  • Elle
    Apr 03

    Only pertains to models made up until 2015. A search of government databases conducted by CR did not find any reported incidents or injuries related to wheels detaching on the models post-2015 redesign.

  • emily groendyke
    Apr 04

    I have a BOB and I recommended this stroller to a friend the day before I saw this article. I can’t in good conscious continue to do so. The fact that the company fought the potential recall is so disturbing; I vote with my dollars and I can’t endorse this kind of corporate behavior.

Radon

Looking for some information/insight on radon in homes? We’ve been living in our home in Hamden for 2 years now and the radon levels were very high when we did the inspection before moving in. We took the necessary steps to “fix” the problem at the time but it’s something that still worries us. We know that the couple who lived here for a long time before us both had cancer in recent years, and... More

  • Stacey
    Apr 03

    There are tests you can pick up at Home Depot to test the levels to see if there is still a problem after fixing it or you can do some other mitagation steps to reduce the levels if thru are still too high. You should not have to move.

  • B
    Apr 04

    I would test twice a year to make sure. But basically means making sure your home doesn’t have cracks it can enter. radon is a leading cause of lung cancer. I’d get an expert out to reinsoect and give some advice

Anonymous posted in Parent's Health Apr 02

Silent Migraine?

Has anyone experienced or knows someone who has had silent migraines? Silent migraine has all the symptoms of a migraine without the pain. My doctor believes that’s what I have. For the last two months are so, I have been having 1-3 days of bad nausea and dizziness, which goes away, then comes back. I’m on day four of my 8th episode. During this time I’m extremely irritable and pretty depressed... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 04

    @Sierra, it is a terrible feeling, it cripples you. I wonder if you are referring to the epley maneuver. They so help with vertigo, which was what I started with in these couples of nausea. @Jess, I read that hormonal change can trigger migraines. In my case, it could have been, but I’m not sure. I stopped taking Lexapro and changed birth control brand about two months ago. Both could have ma... More

  • Jess
    Apr 05

    Stopping lexapro plus starting a new birth control can totally throw your body off balance. I had to stop taking a migraine preventive and I was going through withdrawal for about a month, couldn’t figure out why I was so nauseous and dizzy all the time and then realized it was that. Especially if you don’t slowly change it. Drink a ton of water too. And maybe get a different pcp bc they should... More

Marriage question

I don't understand why my husband feels cuz he works 12 hours a day he shouldn't have to do anything for the kids my kids are 18 14 + 8 and when he gets a day off of work while he wants to do is sit around the house and still wants me to do everything and then when I do want to go have me some me time he wants me to take two other kids with me.

Anonymous posted in Parent's Health Apr 01

Probably TMI... postpartum question

Okay so this is probably TMI but I really don’t know what else to do and I’m too embarrassed to call my OB yet. I am 13 months postpartum so I’m obviously cleared for sex, tampons, etc., but I haven’t done any of those things yet (I’m a single mom). I had a vaginal delivery and a 2nd degree tear in both directions and was stitched up. At my six week check up my OB said I was good to resume norm... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 02

    Thank you everyone! I started bleeding today (not my period) so I did put in a call to my OB and have an appointment for tomorrow. I am still breastfeeding; I had no idea that it could effect healing so I will be sure to mention that! Thanks again!

  • DinaCooney
    Friday

    A lot of people don’t know that you can see a physical therapist for pelvic floor issues like vaginal pain, painful intercourse, painful sitting, etc. maybe you should talk to your doctor about that - depending on where you live, your doctor may or may not be aware of it either. I am a pelvic floor PT and these are issues that I treat daily. You may be able to find a pelvic floor PT near you b... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Mar 30

bed sharing and sex?

For parents that share the bed with their LO, how often are you really having sex?

  • Carisa
    Apr 01

    With my first one I still had sex like 3x a week. With my second, like 1x a week.

  • Yami
    Apr 15

    We have sex almost every other day. We just let the little guy fall asleep and move him to his bed while we have some mommy daddy time. He usually wakes up soon after and comes back to bed with us but so far so good. This method definitely has an expiration date so keep that in mind but for now maybe give it a try

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