Family Life

Get advice and share ideas on navigating one's own family and extended family, including relationships with in-laws, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, and more.

Anonymous posted in Behavior May 31

I’m so tired of fighting with my 3 year old every time we go out to eat

I used to love going out to restaurants with my family but now I hate it! I never want to go anywhere to sit down and eat because yes miserable for me and my son cause he doesn’t want to eat anything so the whole time we’re out is spent with me trying to get him to try something or trying to keep him entertained so he doesn’t get bored and upset I hate it! I don’t get to eat I get anxiety and g... More

  • Gean
    Jun 06

    From reading these I guess Im the only one that had a mother that said, "If you dont like what I cooked, you can go with out"! I realize that that is harder when you go out, because there might be a scene. But trust me, The more you do it at home, the sooner the point will be made and understood. This is first hand experience here.

  • Nana
    Jun 08

    Make sure meal times at home are scheduled. Same rules go for restaurant behavior as home. Set the timer at home he doesn’t get up till the timer goes off. If you make food a stress he will also have anxiety over food. Relax enjoy the meal and conversation. Offer foods but don’t make it a battle.

Jade posted in Adoption May 31

Karli, a Sesame Street character in foster care

Did anyone hear about this? So great to see some representation of non-traditional home life on TV. Hopefully, this will open up some dialogue and help to remove some of the stigmas associated with kids in the foster care system. Yay Sesame Street! 🙌🏼 https://www-m.cnn.com/2019/05/20/entertainment/sesame-street-karli-foster-care/index.html?r=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.ca%2F

  • Junoii
    Jun 01

    Yes , I thought it was great ! Difinitely choked me up a bit. I wish people had more conversations about foster care and adoption so the stigma would go away

  • Angie
    Jun 03

    AND they named a street in NY Sesame Street the other day! Love SS and Mr Rogers!

All inclusive holiday

Looking for any recommendations for an all inclusive holiday! Looking for a week away where kids can have their own time (1yr old & 4 yr old) and my husband and I can have some time alone.. with wine.

  • Cathy
    May 29

    I was going to suggest a cruise too. There’s a Facebook page called Disney Cruise Line Junkies and there’s like, 80,000 people on it. You can get all sorts of advice. We’ve never been but people LOVE it.

  • T
    May 30

    I’m not sure your 1yo will be allowed at the kids clubs on cruises. I thought most started at 3yo & potty trained to be left at inclusive resorts...

Dads & Moms and Teamwork

There's a mom & dad that are tag teaming their 3 & 1 year-old on our flight, & it's adorable! The dad managed to get seated in a row with the two kids, the mom stayed further back. The kids are super adorbs & the mom's taking each them for walks when she can. Meanwhile, the dad's hanging out with the other kid (kids when the seatbelt sign's on). It's super-fun to see all the teamwork!

Anonymous posted in Family Life May 17

MIL issues. (Long rant, sorry!!!!)

My MIL has never ever liked me. From day 1 she had already made up her mind about me and has refused to get to know me or even try to be nice. She constantly puts me down and makes me feel useless because I am a SAHM. She feels as if I’m ‘not going anywhere in life’ and that I’m just ‘spending all her sons money’. Ever since our daughter was born she constantly has something to say about how I’... More

  • Anonymous
    May 20

    Girl. My mother is Law is the SAME WAY. She tries to tell me to "put socks on him" or "well you need to just let him do this or that " and my son is 10mo old and she CONSTANTLY tries bully me into letting him spend the night at her house, without me. When we are out somewhere she will take my son from me and will refuse to give him back. I loose my shit. I try to tell her s... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life May 16

Commute or move

Currently live in a town that we love with great schools, great walkable downtown, and our family is all within a few mins, but spouse is taking a job that is only 18 miles away, but the commute is about an hour because of awful traffic. He wants to move so we are within 5 mins of his office, and the schools are actually even better there, but it’s not the same feel. I love our town and it’s wh... More

  • Anonymous
    May 20

    K..... traffic really can kill the mood. We moved from Queens, ny to Colorado Springs and now southern Maryland and traffic is terrible. I can’t believe I tell my husband I miss Colorado Springs.

  • Anonymous
    May 20

    Yeah...it’s one thing if it’s back roads or something but we are stuck dealing w only 1 major highway that is always congested. Totally feel your pain! Although Colorado Springs is beautiful!

Anonymous posted in Family Life May 10

2 under 2?

Hey all! Was wondering some tips and tricks you had for having 2 under 2. My daughter is 5.5 months and we just found out we’re having another baby! Which means she’ll be about 14 months when our next one is born. I’ve heard it’s harder to go from 1 baby to 2, and just wanted advice on how to handle it, what to expect and what I can do to make it a little easier on everyone. Any and all answers... More

  • Ashley
    May 10

    Baby wearing was a must for me! It made doing everything with my older son that much easier. Try to go with the flow and just know some days will be harder than others. It is all worth it when you see them interact and play with each other.

  • Kieli
    May 11

    Well I just started ... I have a 1 week old and a 23 month old (so she’s close to 2 already, a little older). But my oldest has really been having a hard time at night. She doesn’t fall asleep until 11 or 12 every night which is horrible on me and makes me want to cry! I’m hoping she will come out of it, and start sleeping by herself again. She loves the baby, and wants to be with her all the t... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life Apr 30

Am I being crazy?

My mother in law was posting a lot of pictures I sent her of my son on her Facebook. She lives across the country, so I try to text her pictures every few days so she doesn’t feel like she’s being left out or missing anything. It has been bothering me though, that she posts almost all of these pictures online. I am the opposite as I try to keep as much private as possible and tend to only post ... More

  • Stacey
    May 09

    I do not allow anyone to post pictures of my daughter. Or it’s something special. But I would definitely talk to your partner and both of you should speak to her at the same time. It’s just being honest with her that you don’t want these private moments online. And if she won’t stop I would stop sending pictures real quick.

  • Anonymous
    Jun 10

    I don’t like it as well, but it’s a fight I won’t win. I post my kids pictures every now and then on social media and I only have people I know. They accept any request, and with crazy people out there I’m don’t like it. But they already think I’m too controlling so I don’t even bother.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Apr 16

Boundaries

I’m struggling with holding my tongue with my mother in law right now. I thought our head count for our child’s first birthday party was done until I get one of our invites “return to sender” with her handwriting on it. SHE SENT OUT OUR INVITES to people and we didn’t even know but I’m curious as to how she got her hands on them. I was already ordering food and cake with the head count I alread... More

  • Julie
    Apr 30

    Why did the mother in law cross the road? Because she thought it was a boundary. I would honestly give my husband exactly one chance to talk to his mother and try to fix the damage she’s done and if he didn’t want to or didn’t do it correctly I’d pick up the phone myself and be the one to set her straight. I’d also tell her that she had two options: 1- uninvite the guests she sent invites t... More

  • Anonymous
    May 26

    Call her out! That’s so rude.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Apr 16

Rant: Easter family issues

My family gets together every Easter for lunch at my mother’s. We basically get together for the main holidays and every few months for birthdays. This year, my sister’s kids were going to be at their dad’s. Their dad is now letting the kids go with my sister on Easter. Rather than going to my mom’s, they are going to her boyfriend’s family get together and skipping my mom’s. My sist... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 16

    It sounds like the issue is her boyfriend? Is it just him that doesn’t want to go to your family stuff or do you think it’s her too? My husband isn’t a fan of my family gatherings... my family knows it and they don’t really bring it up to me anymore because they know it’s a sensitive topic. If anything, they’ll just say “hey, we really miss having you at these events. What can we change so you ... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life Apr 12

Family Gatherings

We’re a family of 4, my husband and I and our two kids. I have a big family compared to my husband. Holidays, and celebrations, etc are a big thing for us. He is always unwilling and states that he doesn’t need to go or be there. But we’re a family and we should be there together. Not just me and the kids. I understand that he doesn’t or we don’t need to go to every family event but if it is im... More

  • Anonymous
    Apr 16

    It’s also nice (and important) to spend time with just your immediate family, rather than focusing on the extended...

  • Angie
    Apr 18

    Compromise. Maybe he only goes to family gatherings on holidays and birthdays. Or take turns....he skips, you skip, he skip, you skip. The ones you skip,,,,,he gets to take the kids alone and you have a break from parenting.

Leaving my 2 year old for nursing school

Guys I'm stuck in a huge dilemma. I live in Dallas texas with my husband and my parent live literally down the street from me. I just got accepted to Nursing school which was always my dream. Problem is, the school is in Houston Texas which is 4 hours away. It's a 2 year program. And I have to leave m 2.5 year old and husband because of his job here to go to Houston. She will spend the ... More

  • Jing
    Apr 19

    One of my husband’s friends gave birth during her residency program while her husband was working in another city four hours away. She hired a nanny and was a single mom during the week for about two years. It was extremely hard at times but they made through it. Since then she graduated from the program, reunited with her husband and had another child. I think a lot of it depends on the unique... More

  • Anonymous
    May 02

    What did you decide?

Chores

Do you make your kids do chores? Why or why not

  • Margaret
    Apr 09

    My son will be 2 next month. We don't have set "chores," but he does help around the house. He has to pick up his toys at the end of the day, he likes to feed our dog, and we even made a swiffer that's his size because he always wants to help clean the floors. My husband and I felt it's important to start having him help around the house early to instill a sense of respons... More

  • Mama
    Apr 10

    Yes we will. My hopes is that it will teach industriousness. Being helpful. Selflessness. Independence.

MIL watching baby, how to handle an awkward request for her to leave at end of day

When we first set up this plan to have both grandmothers watching my baby, I told my husband not to over commit because it will he awkward to scale back on commitments... And here we are, wanting to scale back our WEEKLY family dinners on Thursdays with his bro/his mom who watches my baby that day, to bi-weekly. I know if we wait till bro gets a job, that can be the reason to scale back to b... More

  • Michaela
    Apr 04

    You could be honest about the reason. Probably the hardest option but she might take it better than you expect her to

  • B
    Apr 05

    You also could stop thinking of these as dinner parties. Talk to them and say it’s too much. Hey brother, your week to bring the food. Hey grandma, I’m starting the crockpot you watch it.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Apr 01

Juggling baby and toddler bedtimes

My two month old is ready for her good night sleep around 7pm, but my 2 year old’s bedtime is around 8:30-9. My baby sleeps well but someone needs to be close if she starts to fuss otherwise it will take a long time to calm her back to sleep. My husband gets home with my son around 6:30pm so this means I’m often leaving right after dinner to put the baby to bed. My husband and son feel abandone... More

  • B
    Apr 02

    I’d either try to push babies bedtime back (and adjust naps and wake time to help), or get a monitor so that you can put her to sleep then go back from like 7:30-8:30 with the family.

  • Megan
    Apr 02

    We didn’t put our second in his own room until about 4 months old. So when he was that age we would have him downstairs with us til our bedtime. Either being held or in a swing. Once he was in his own room we started their bedtime routines together. We would have our toddler help put the baby to bed as part of her routine and than finish her routine. That helps keep her up a little later as she... More

Does anyone have any advice on long distance relationships between child and parent?

  • Belladonna
    Apr 14

    Skype everyday so you can have a face to face interaction. Also mailing thing in the mail can be fun and writing letter to each other. Just some ideas.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Mar 29

Most important factors in deciding where to live?

An opportunity came up for us to move back to my home state (Maine). We have lived in Houston, Texas for almost two years. It is where my son was born, where my husbands family lives, but we have seen no progress in setting roots through getting a permanent home or anything, so it wouldn’t be a difficult transition back. We are feeling conflicted because where one place is bad, the other is goo... More

  • PK
    Mar 30

    Where would you be the most financially stable? What is cost of living like? Would the air quality in Texas affect your health enough where it would hinder any of you from being happy? With a long cold winter.. do you feel like you have the tools to engage your son until it warms up enough to go play outside again? If you were to move to Maine, would you still have the same amount of oppo... More

  • Emily
    May 18

    What is your list of must-haves and important resources for a place to live? Do you still have family in Maine? If not, then is it important to have the extended family close? How does his family feel about you moving (if you guys are close). Texas and Maine are very different. What place is more in line with you are as parents/people? Weather is easy to navigate. I grew up on the east coast an... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life Mar 28

Mothers intuition

I dont like my mil, she is rude. But is that a good enough reason to not let my son spend the night at her house? I would like them to have a relationship. But I dont want a relationship with her. I'm not sure if it's my dislike for her or my intuition telling me not to send him to her house anymore. My boyfriend wants his mom to see our son as much as she wants, which is one weekend a ... More

  • Bee
    Apr 16

    I don't know why this ride seems to exist between you and your MIL, but to be honest it really doesn't matter. As a mom and baby's first protector, you need to follow your own intuition at every turn. Personally, overnight visits with ANYONE - relatives included - are completely out of the question for me at this stage. Mine is 13 months old and I have no idea if this will ever chan... More

  • Steph
    Apr 27

    I wouldn’t let my relationship with any in law get in the way, but then again I wouldn’t let my kids stay overnight with them either. I want them to get along and love their family and cousins and such, but I have strong reasons to not let them stay overnight without me around. First, my kids are bilingual and although they know to speak English with my in laws, my in laws still don’t understan... More

Rye posted in Family Life Mar 26

Dogs that are good with active kids? Is getting a dog a good option for kids?

My son is 7 years old. Only child. I’m thinking about getting him a dog but I want to here other peoples opinions about having a dog (pros & cons).

  • Anne
    Apr 16

    We have a Black Russian Terrier. By far one of the greatest breeds. He is huge, plays fetch endlessly, doesn’t shed (unless he really needs a bath), and has the best temperament. Pros of having a dog: teaches your kid responsibility; protection Cons: do you have the time, space, energy?

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