Anonymous

Child care at 2 months?

I'm looking for other opinions about putting baby in daycare at 2 months old. I'm torn with the idea of leaving my baby at a daycare all day while I return to work. I have no family/friends close by to babysit as an option so it's either daycare and go back to work or quit and possibly find a new job in a few years. My husband works and can make enough to support and most of my income would go to paying day care and be left with a little extra to contribute to bills. I'm worried about my daughter not getting the attention she needs while there as there is one care provider to every 4 children at the daycare we had chosen..

  • April
    Aug 26, 2018

    Maybe you went to a bad daycare? I’ve seen a lot of them so I’m not saying you’re wrong but there are good ones out there, you just have to really look. Annon, have you thought of putting them in part time? Like 2-3 days a week?

  • Emily
    Aug 26, 2018

    I’m in the same position as you and decided it is better for my family if I am able to stay home so that I will be able to bring our baby to see my side of the family who are located in a different state. I think that it is a personal choice and the main thing is what is best for your family, but you also need to think about the fact that you will be home all day with baby and that is tough for some personality types especially if you are a very outgoing person who needs interaction with other adults.

  • Dani
    Aug 26, 2018

    I do not regret putting my son in daycare with his 3 year old sister. He gets to learn more than just I can teach him. He knows who I am and is happy to see me. I love my daycare.

  • Anonymous
    Aug 26, 2018

    April, Unfortunately part time wouldnt work. It would be the same amount of money I would have to pay the daycare and my job doesn't offer anything but full time and if I didn't work full time making the money I make now then I would not afford the daycare expenses

  • Giannina
    Aug 26, 2018

    If you can quit and be ok for a few more months at least, I’d do that. Spend more time with your newborn! You will regret not doing so. You can put the baby in day care of needed after a year. While doing that you can look for online jobs or a part time...

  • Karen
    Aug 26, 2018

    My son went to daycare when he was 3 month old. You just need to find a daycare where you feel they take care of him. The first month i call more than 3 time at day. I only paid $7020 a year and you have to weeks vacations. They are amazing with the kids and also he can continue until vpk

  • Nat
    Aug 26, 2018

    April maybe you are right I have only worked at one day care and I hated it I wanted to call child service on them I was the only one that was actually a teacher they are people at this day care that spoke very poor English and had no degree or anything on child care the only thing that back them up was that the were parents themselves and not all the “teachers” were females

  • April
    Aug 27, 2018

    Yeah I’d make sure whoever is watching my son speaks English so they can tell me about his day. You should’ve called them! I would’ve if the children weren’t safe or the day care wasn’t up to state law. The male/ female thing, I’m definitely okay with the male teachers. And Nat if you’re certified in CPR and love kids you should look into nannying! I did it for years and it was amazing pay plus one on one with a child or two.

  • Naomi
    Aug 27, 2018

    I work at a daycare and both of my kids started at 6 weeks. The best thing is that they usual don’t get sick much now at 7 and 4.

  • Mallory
    Aug 28, 2018

    I just wanted to include my two cents because there are so many negative comments here about daycare, and I want to be one more voice that reassures you that daycare is fine, if not beneficial. I sent my child to daycare at 3 months, which was actually later than most of the parents I know. Centers take infants starting at 6 weeks. My child goes to a center that is a national chain. There are only 6 infants and they are separated in their own little infant room so that they are not around bigger kids. There are two main infant teachers and several "floaters" that step in for extra help or as substitutes. Let me reassure you that the teachers LOVE going to the infant room to play with the babies. I have surprised them on many occasions (not intentionally, I just have a long commute that can sometimes be shortened or lengthened) and the babies are always receiving lots of attention. While in daycare, my little one has gotten on a schedule, learned to sleep in a crib (no, we didn't do that at home), learns physical milestones quickly (he was able to hold his bottle faster than my stay-at-home friends' babies, among other things), and has actually made a best friend (they stare and laugh at each other for hours. HOURS). On the flip side, I have a friend who sends her daughter to an in-home daycare. While there is less curriculum regarding milestones, the socialization is even better there because there are two infants and three toddlers, and they all comingle. The toddlers interact with the infants to teach them things, and they all play with each other. I just wanted to share this because in my personal day-to-day life, I have only heard one story of a parent not liking their daycare and pulling their child out, whereas most of the parents I know send their kids to daycare as soon as maternity leave ends and have had great experiences.

  • Michael
    Aug 28, 2018

    You get what they staff for. This often turns into “you get what you pay for”, but not always. State law and national standard boards often have lower teacher student ratios than some, slightly more expensive daycare’s will use. If you email the inquiry address at the local daycares, you can get the ratios of teachers to students. On top of that, little babies are loved. You will likely see office staff as well volunteering for a snuggle. Your child will almost certainly get more total physical and emotional affection with you saving up all your nurturing for the evenings and weekends.

  • Melissa
    Aug 28, 2018

    If your salary will only pay for the daycare don’t do it. Wait a bit longer if possible... preferably until the risk of SIDS has passed or at least diminished. This mom’s story convinced me: https://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2015/11/15/a-baby-dies-at-day-care-and-a-mother-asks-why-she-had-to-leave-him-so-soon/ And to be clear, I understand having to go back to work to make ends meet, but in this situation you are saying that your salary will mostly just go to daycare. If the baby were older then my opinion would be very different (daycares are excellent for socializing and learning development) but at 2 months I think it’s too young, unless you really don’t have a choice. Could you look for a different job say when the baby is 6 months?

  • Melissa
    Aug 28, 2018

    When my daughter was born, it was my job to report child fatalities to local officials, including those occurring in a daycare setting. So saying I was nervous to leave my newborn baby in a daycare is an understatement. On the first day I dropped my daughter off, however, it was clear that her teacher really knew what she was doing (more so than we did as new parents), and not only took great care of my daughter, but also became a resource for us. She saved us so many dr. visits with her knowledge and expertise. So, I think the trick is finding someone you're comfortable with and who really loves taking care of children.

  • Gina Hughes
    Aug 29, 2018

    For the alarmists out there posting stories about children dying in Day Care, there is no evidence that infants are more likely to die or otherwise be harmed in Day Care than in their own homes! I agree with all who have posted to be careful to investigate the Day Care for proper staffing and training. Spend more than a few minutes checking out the facility, and ask to talk to some of the other parents. There have been many well-done studies published in peer-reviewed journals validating that infants and young children do very well in quality Day Care programs. I had hoped that by now we moms were well past the working mom shaming!

  • Kritza
    Aug 29, 2018

    Hello Have you looked into home daycares. They are smaller and I have had a great experience with them

  • Jenni
    Aug 30, 2018

    We started our two daughters in a national chain daycare each at three months old. While it wasn’t cheap, our girls each received nurturing care from those who watched them as infants. I don’t think it’s ever easy to put your baby in daycare, but if you find one you trust (we used NAEYC accredited daycares), it can work for you and your family.

  • M
    Sep 29, 2018

    I was in the same position but decided to stay home. It’s tough but I feel well worth it.

  • Heidi
    Sep 29, 2018

    @nat not sure of New Jersey’s legal ratios since I work in a PA child care center but having that number of teachers for children would be illegal in PA. The ratio would be 1:4 so they would need another teacher or two. So either the daycare you were working with was not doing what they were supposed to in which case it’s just that particular center you worked with. Where I work the teachers completely spoil the babies rotten. Every center is different and honestly I recommend tour a lot of centers and find one that you mesh well with. I have an amazing relationship with all of the parents at my center and even babysit for them outside of work. You’d honestly be surprised with the amount of attention the kids get as long as you search for a quality program