Single Parents

Support and discussions about raising kids solo, including dating as a parent, being a single parent by choice, birth parents, and more.

My 3 yr old takes FOREVER to fall asleep!!!!!

I don’t know if she just has insomnia or if I’m doing something wrong but bed time is a huge battle that lasts for two hours and strips me from having any alone time. I’m a single parent so I don’t have anyone helping me get her to bed. She throws a fit if I leave the room so I’m sitting here until she falls asleep. She’ll roll around in the bed, talk to herself, sing, play with her stuff anima... More

  • Anonymous
    Oct 08

    Have you tried an ok to wake clock? My son used to drag out bedtime too... kept getting out of bed and screamed at the door. We got the clock with the dog and ball that turns red and green (amazon). Red means stay in bed and green means go. We got door knob covers too so he couldn’t come out of his room. With our baby monitor we would just remind him that red means stay in bed and that we would... More

  • MamaNukesYopolo
    Oct 11

    My first two kids dropped their nap around age 3. My oldest would do exactly what your child is doing. Take forever at bed time, rarely falling asleep before 930. I used to bring my computer in the room and just sit in the corner angled away. I told my son I would tell him a story, sing a song 5x, then go do my work. He rolled with it, and I felt like i atleast could do something. Pay bills, sh... More

Anonymous posted in Single Parents Oct 01

How to time manage with little sleep?

I am a mom of two beautiful toddlers. I have a two and three year old. I work overnight so that I am with them in the morning. I am also a single mom. I don’t want to do daycare yet. I do nap in the morning for about two hours before they up. I nap another two to three hours during their nap time. I am always tired and I would like to do more with them. I don’t have much support. Any idea or ti... More

  • Anonymous
    Oct 03

    Thank you so much. I appreciate the feed back. I was thinking that I do need help. Lol it’s so hard to realize sometimes because we try to do it all. It hitting me now .

  • Anonymous
    Oct 03

    yes! When you are at your best, your kids get the best of you too. it's a win win for everyone if you get a few hours of help in the day so you can get proper rest. night shift is already a strain on the body and your sleep is so important. don't feel bad about getting childcare for a couple hours. good luck!

Anonymous posted in Single Parents Sep 28

My life is all about my child

I’m a single mom of one two year old . I’m starting to let myself go and it’s all about my baby. Before I had a child I had my hair done etc... Now, I’m not myself . I feel bad if I spend money on myself and I don’t go out to enjoy myself . I mostly go out for my son only . This isn’t healthy because I’m starting to wish I didn’t have a child . It’s bad to say but true. What is the best way to ... More

  • Raji
    Sep 29

    I think it’s important for you to take care of yourself especially since you are single parent. You should not be feeling guilty. Start small, put some money aside for yourself from every paycheck and use it for yourself. Your child will appreciate a happier mom.

Anonymous posted in Child Care Sep 26

No one to watch 2yo

Im basically a single mom with no family around, I’ve never let anyone watch my toddler. If I go into labor will the hospital allow my toddler to stay in the delivery room or do hospitals have childcare centers? Will the hospital allow her to stay overnight with me?

  • Monica
    Oct 12

    What area do you live in?

  • Marie
    Thursday

    Yes what area do you live? I would love to help out if I can. And we have a beautiful group of SAHMs where I'm at that always pitch in to help. Please reach out to me

How to organize myself ??

Good day all, I am a single mom of two boys 7/11 and I find myself all over the place with my hands into a lot of things but not really getting anything done. I wake up early to take the kids to school, go back home and get ready for work. Then I get out of work to pick them up and go straight home. Sometimes I have to wait a while for a parking. If I have the kids start homework first in the ... More

  • C D
    Oct 03

    You are not alone. I, and other moms I know who work outside of home, struggle, as well, so don’t feel bad. In addition to trying to trying to delegate age appropriate chores, I also try to do what I can ahead of time for meals. I try to double recipes so we can eat half now and then freeze the other half for a tough night later on. I also use a crock pot (to cook while we’re at work/school) an... More

  • Jennifer
    Oct 03

    Definitely meal prep ahead of time on the weekends so you have your whole week of meal planned out. Or use an instant pot. I typically throw all the food in the instant pot when I get home and put it to cook. Or make easy 15 minute meals like spagetthi or vegtable and beef stir fry. While I'm waiting for instant pot to be done, I have time to help my kids get homework done. I work ful... More

I did it. I separated from my abusive husband.

2 days later I found out I was pregnant. Now I have a high risk pregnancy (16 weeks along) and a 2 year old and I'm a single mom. I feel completely lost. Like a puzzle piece without a puzzle. I have no idea what to do, where to turn, where do I belong. Before this I was a sahm. Now what?? Any advice for me?

  • Lulu
    Sep 20

    Thank you Ivy

  • Katrina
    Sep 23

    glad to hear you left the abusive situation. no one deserves that. going forward it's your body and your choice what you want to do. you have full power to decided what is best for you & your 2 yo. there is no wrong choice. find support services, where he cannot easily find you. search online for single mothers support groups or support for domestic violence survivors, this may help yo... More

Should I move in with my son’s father?

I’m currently living with his mom. I had to move unexpectedly and this was really my only option. My son’s father and I have been on and off for a while now. He wasn’t very consistent in our son’s life until a few months ago. He does pay child support but I’ve kept it at a low amount to not make it hard on him. (He also pays for 2 other children) anyway, we recently agreed to work on a relation... More

  • Beverly Vantine
    Sep 12

    If finances were a huge concern, and I thought it better than living with my mom, then yes I'd do it. BUTTTTT.... I would suggest that you both get a piece of paper and write out expectations so you can come to an agreement. Because if you're not building life together, you should both still be able to date or have some social life on the weekend. So before moving in, figure out how you... More

  • Brooke
    Sep 12

    Honestly I think it depends on the people and the situation around why you broke up in the first place. Is there any hard feelings? Is someone still in love? Are you guys civil around each other? Unless you're like friends now, I don't see it being a great idea just because your son will be there and in the middle of anything that would happen but if there's no hard feelings I don&#... More

MIL doesn’t date, her son told her “not to”

My MIL is single/divorced (despite whatever weird relationship is going on with her ex-husband... I won’t go into details lol). During a tumultuous time in their life, my husband had to step up and become the adult early on in his life. He always said, “you don’t date or marry anyone, no one will treat you well” as a means of protecting/loving his single mom. They were very close for a while u... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 31

    How long has she been single? Has she already been obsessing over your child? Is your husband the biological father? Asking all this because it based on what you said, it sounds like your MIL has been single for a while and I’m making the assumption that your husband is the biological father of your 1 year old (info provided next to your name). So wouldn’t you know if she would obsess over th... More

  • cocomac
    Sep 02

    Yes biological father and she has been single for a long time. She is hugely obsessive and lives for any and all attention. She works part time and has friends she sees so that’s good. I’m still wondering if she’s actually holding back dating due to what my husband said. Eventually her other son will move out.. and she could get lonely.. I guess it’s. A Lesson learned. If I was her. I would be... More

Daughter has never had a father figure

Hey guys, I could really use some advice or a different view point on my situation. My daughter is almost three and I was a single mom most of her life. During her whole life she’s hardly been around men. (Lots of girls in our family) Only my stepdad, my grandpa and her father on the rare occasion. I think because she was hardly around men, she developed a fear of them. So she never really lik... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 13

    I've typed a response to this post several times but have deleted it constantly because I just can't figure out how to word what I want to say. Basically, your boyfriend needs to stop. If she is scared when he gets stern he needs to stop. End of story. I went through this with my boyfriend, the two of them started butting heads a lot. I had it out with him and explained that he needs to... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 13

    Is she really scared of him though if she behaves fine when she’s alone with him? And if she’s behaving with just him... then technically he’s also seen her good side too right? Maybe it’s not fear that’s the issue but really her just being a toddler and testing you both as a team. When you disagree on discipline, do you show it or express that in front of her? Maybe she’s trying to figure o... More

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation Aug 11

Dating after divorce

I have been divorced twice, with one child from each marriage. My kids are 4 and 7. I have been through extensive therapy to determine why I keep choosing the wrong type of personality traits in a partner, as well as my own issues, and after 2 years I believe I’m finally ready to find the right person. I’m very concerned that I won’t be able to find someone who will be willing to handle dealing... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 13

    Thanks, that’s so nice to hear you found someone without even looking! And gives me hope! I just can’t imagine someone willing to deal with 2x the pickups/dropoffs, texts/calls, stress, jealousy, etc. ☹️

  • Anonymous
    Sep 13

    Yes! Don’t lose hope! You will find someone, there’s over a billion guys in this world. There is someone for you & your kids💕 Maybe don’t let him in on all the 411 regarding the dads. I am very open with my fiancé about my ex on everything. But I’ve noticed he does get jealous & insecure sometimes, so I keep some stuff to myself.

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation Jun 21

Scared to leave

I want to leave my husband, but I’m too scared to be on my own. I’m currently a SAHM with nothing but a high school diploma. I just don’t see how it’s possible for me to financially support my baby if I leave. I will be able to stay with my mom for a while, but eventually I’d like us to live on our own. What kind of jobs do you single parents have? I know daycare is ridiculously expensive. Thi... More

  • Wendy
    Aug 09

    you are scared of change.. there’s a difference. you say you don’t know what to do but you just said you can stay at your moms, “husband” can help out either through verbal agreement or child support. anything is possible!! just ask the single mammas out there.. i’m doing it 🙌🏽 trust once you get the ball rolling you’ll look back and say WHY DIDNT I LEAVE SOONER! ❤️ Kids are really not that ex... More

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation Jun 16

Newly single mom

Me and his dad are still together til our lease is up in February. We are cordial but it's hard to set boundaries when grieving under the same roof. Do any other single parents have advice for going through a breakup while still living together? I'm especially having a tough time with accepting the breakup as valid and permanent. I really never wanted to be a single mom but here I am. ... More

  • anonymous mom
    Aug 09

    You can’t move on until you physically move on. At least that’s been my observation of others going through the same thing. I would honestly reevaluate sticking it out until February. It sucks, but breaking a lease and eating the $$ required to do so would make a lot more sense to me than living with my ex for the next 6 months.

Anonymous posted in Money May 26

Single mom struggling.

Hi guys. I’m a single mom. I have SO much going on right now mentally that I feel like Such a mess. My daughters father was abusive so I worry about letting her see him. So far he’s been really distant with her but he says every once in a while that he wants to see her and of course my daughter wants everything to do with that. I don’t know how to handle it. I don’t trust him. I’m also living a... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 10

    Hi, I think you’re in a tough situation but this can actually be a great thing. Thank goodness you have your parents around and right now you and your daughter have a stable home. I’m sure you’re paying less rent there than if you had your own place. Budget, and save as much as possible right now. Have you considered asking for child or spousal support? Are you not receiving because you want to... More

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation May 26

Fiance wants to break up, we have a 2 year old

I feel like a failure of a mother as now I’ll have two different children with two different dads. My first marriage ended amicably and I get along great with my ex and we co parent very well. I’ve been with my current fiancé almost 4 years and he never wants to spend time with us, all he does is work and lay around the house. We’ve gone to therapy, I’ve begged him to spend more time with his c... More

  • Anonymous
    May 26

    Get a lawyer. Both dads should be paying child support

Anonymous posted in Child Care May 23

Security blanket/stuffed animal

So my son is almost 15 months old. We have never spent any time apart. I’m a single mom, he sleeps in my bed, and we go everywhere together. There’s literally never a moment we’re not together. A security blanket/stuffed animal hasn’t been necessary and he hasn’t really taken to anything because I have always been there 24/7. He is going to start a Mother’s Day Out program in the fall 2 days a ... More

  • Kendall
    May 25

    Agree ^^ my son carries his puppy around day care ALL DAY LONG and they don’t mind a bit. So I also disagree the program wouldn’t allow it, I think it would be ok, especially if he’s new.

  • Jamie
    May 25

    I highly recommend role playing. It makes a huge difference when they know what to expect. Get a stuffed animal and pretend that you and your child are the parents. Drop the stuffed animal off and reassure him and kiss him goodbye. You might even have some activities to pretend that the stuffed animal will do while at MDO and some other stuffed animals to represent the kids. Then, switch roles.... More

Elena posted in Child Care May 19

Daycare preschool

First time mom here. I'm a stay at home single mom how is that possible it is lol I live with a family member because I'm newly separated my question is since I was a stay at home mom while married I never considered day care well my son turned two and I think it would be good for him and me to go for a couple days a week is he too old ? Is day care mandatory what is the difference betw... More

  • Elena
    May 20

    Thank you so much

  • Maeghan
    May 22

    Try a Mother’s Day Out! I’m also a single SAHM (the looks I get when I say that 😂). I’m starting my son in the fall (he’ll be 18 months) and I’m going to work there for a little extra money. Mother’s Day Outs are typically 2 (sometimes 3) days a week and they don’t stay as long- usually 9-2. Not great for everyone but hoping it works for us! I’m not comfortable (and it’s unnecessary for us) put... More

Anonymous posted in Blended Families May 18

Out of state custody

I am looking into moving to another state in order to get away from my daughter’s father- he is really not a safe person. I know I need to be in a new state for 182 days in order to gain jurisdiction there. Does anyone have experience in this type of situation that could offer me advice or pleasant stories (I’m terrified to do this). Much love! Thank you!

  • Anya levonavna
    May 20

    I was in a very similar situation I’m 2012 when I found myself in a toxic marriage with an abusive man. We lived in PA but I was from New York City and still had a lot of strong ties there. I took my two year old son and left in the middle of the night. My husband came several times to try to take our son back but as soon as he would show up I d call the police. I went to the precinct and I spo... More

  • Anonymous
    May 24

    Anya, thank you! How did you get jurisdiction? My biggest question now is what do I need to do right away so that I can prove that I have been there 6 months when the time comes?

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation May 06

What’s in a name?

I was hoping to gather some ideas.... I’m not sure how to teach my 19 month old daughter who her deadbeat birth father is. I cannot bring myself to call him her “dad” or “dada” or “daddy” because those terms seem more enduring and imply a close relationship, which he does not have with her. (He sees her/asks to see her about 1 time a month and ends up just taking pictures to post on social medi... More

  • Lily
    May 09

    I would say just use his first name. Seems appropriate for someone who is only seen once a month

  • Briana
    Jun 15

    I would go with father.

Anonymous posted in Blended Families May 05

When to introduce my significant other to my kid?

I’ve been talking to this guy for about a month now we’ve went on a couple dates and spent a few nights together we’ve talked about a lot of the serious topics and have the same views of what we want out of life and have the same values we click in that sense and in person things just feel right with him and I can see myself with him for the long haul and this is the first guy I’ve been with si... More

  • Anna
    May 13

    I’ve been debating this myself, similar situation. The previous poster made a good point about attachment; that’s been my concern. But a friend that’s been a single parent said that she benefited from introducing her kids early - if the kids didn’t connect with the guy, she took it as a sign and they ended up being true. That being said, I think for me it will boil down to timing, my comfort le... More

  • Anonymous
    May 21

    Not for a while. I wouldn't introduce a man to my kid until at least 6 months of dating if not more.

Anonymous posted in Divorce & Separation Apr 30

Single co-parent depression

Any single parents with joint custody that could give advice on depression while away from your child? I do understand this can be personal but when I’m away from my daughter it leaves me with no motivation to do anything. I’ve tried activities, burying myself in my work, gym, dating (made it worse) and even getting a puppy. Nothing can break this void of missing my daughter To make it wor... More

  • Sj
    May 03

    I get a court ordered call each night at 7:30 which he doesn’t allow most days. It’s the not raising my babies half the time. Such grief and loss... like a half death

  • Wendy
    Aug 09

    I am in the same boat right now. I found myself barried in my bed sleeping all day depressed. i patiently wait for his arrival by the door.

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