Working Parents

Working parents have two jobs — one at home with their children and one at their place of business. Learning to balance it all is a tough but rewarding process.

This is a place to for working moms and dads to share experiences and get advice, whether it's tips on work-life balance or help finding child care.

Working part time while having a big family

My fiancé and I want 6 kids when we get married. Right now he works part time and I am currently looking for a part time job. I graduated from school over a year ago, but I’m having trouble finding work. I’m wondering if it’s even possible to be a working parent while having a big family?

  • Anonymous
    Monday

    Of course it’s possible, people do it everyday. I honestly wouldn’t worry about being able to make a family of eight work yet. Take it one kid at a time.

Anonymous posted in Child Care Sep 09

Where did you find your babysitter?

Hi parents! I’m nearing my third trimester of pregnancy #2. I’ve really been struggling with symptoms this round, especially while working full time and being the daycare drop off/pickup person to boot for baby #1 (16 months). I’d like to broach getting a babysitter for one or two afternoons a week, because I really feel I’m at my breaking point both mentally and physically. How did you fin... More

  • PK
    Sep 10

    We used sittercity.com to find our sitter. We paid for one months subscription (which was discounted for first time users at the time.. I think it still might be), posted a job description and got dozens of applicants. In the job description, just make sure you note that the sitter must be pet friendly and be able to handle a big dog if she/he will be around/handling the dog too. We pay our s... More

Anonymous posted in Pregnancy & Childbirth Sep 04

Looking for a job while pregnant.

I recently started a new job that isn't a good fit. I'm 8-weeks pregnant and looking for a new job now. I'm hesitant to find something in my field (project management) and am looking to take a step back or down in terms of demands and pay. Any tips for someone looking for a new job while pregnant?

  • MamaNukesYopolo
    Sep 04

    I would encourage you to not even think about it being different. I happened to switch jobs within my company (it was a very formal interview process) when I was pregnant, and it was the best decision I ever made. I didn’t happen to know when I interviewed, but being that you are early on, I would not approach your job search thinking about that, beyond knowing what you want from a future job. ... More

  • Anonymous
    Sep 05

    I was 7 months pregnant when I had to start a new job. I was serving, but could no longer physically do it. I had no issues at all. Just be confident and know that it is illegal for them to not hire you just because you are pregnant.

Anonymous posted in Child Care Sep 03

Potty training daycare help

We potty trained our little one over the last 5 days and she was doing very well. No accidents, going to the toilet, etc. She went back to daycare today and when I picked her up she was wearing a diaper. I got upset and asked the teacher but she told me no one knew that she was potty trained (we told the head teacher this morning). What would you do?? Thanks!!!

  • Momof1
    Sep 06

    I would just let them know your preferences. I think it’s easy to forget which child has which needs especially if some are potty trained and others are not. Would you be able to take home the diapers you left for her if you bring them yourself?

  • Anonymous
    Thursday

    Thanks everyone. She had two rocky days and is now fully potty trained, teachers thanked me and said she was definitely ready!

Kelly posted in Child Care Aug 24

Babysitter payment

So I have never hired a paid babysitter before, but now i need someone on a reoccurring basis one afternoon a week for after school care. It will be approximately the same amount of hours every week, but will vary a bit depending upon how long it takes my husband to get home from work. Should i offer to pay a flat daily rate, or on an hourly basis? And if hourly, do you pay by the half hour/15 ... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 24

    Pay hourly. Anywhere from 12-15 an hour.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Aug 23

Grandmas 2x a week, daycare/school 3x a week... or cut out grandmas?

When my toddler will be 18 months, she will spend 3 days a week at daycare/school (tues/wed/thurs). And at home with mom Monday and MIL Friday. Currently she is at home full time with each grandma coming to my house. It’s been helpful because we can just run out of the house in the mornings, sometimes they cook, sometimes they fold laundry, and we get to check off the “see grandma” box and h... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 23

    Edited to add: I do pay the grandmas for their time, and I have anxiety over my kitchen (I’m going to therapy for it haha) and I hate coming home to what is essentially a daycare in my home, and the mess that comes with it. The grandmas eye sights aren’t as detailed as mine so I see every oil/water/drip drop mess!

Bree posted in Behavior Aug 22

Crying fits at day care

So my step son just started a day care/preschool setting this week. Every morning at drop off and every afternoon at pick up, he has these crying fits that range from controllable to uncontrollable. He will either just cry and say no or he will drop himself on the floor and flail his arms and legs (side note: he only does that fit when his mom drops him off). I’m asking for suggestions on ho... More

  • Nana
    Aug 29

    Be confident yourself (if you believe in the environment and staff) and the hardest thing is don’t linger. Talk ahead of expectations and the fun things he might do. At the end of the day ask him questions like “what was the best/ hardest thing about today. How did you show kindness. How did you show kindness.” Reward when drop off and pick up are positive. Tell him at pick up that (favorite t... More

  • May-Ling
    Aug 29

    our preschool suggested we pick up this book to read with our kids to get them used to some kind of dropoff ritual for consistency: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18419.The_Kissing_Hand

Anonymous posted in Child Care Aug 20

Refusing naps at daycare

My 2-year old son just started daycare after being home with a nanny. He's refusing to nap there (they do one afternoon nap that aligns with his naptime at home). He's a good napper at home and sleeps a solid 11 hours each night. The napping situation is different of course at school - a cot instead of a crib. Any tips for how to help him adjust to his new napping situation? The prescho... More

  • Sandi
    Aug 22

    It is not unusual for a child not to nap when they first start preschool. Give it a little time. Some children need to feel safe and comfortable before they will sleep at school. Once he bonds with the teachers and knows he can trust him, he will probably nap at school.

  • Pepper Crawford
    Aug 29

    Hello, from my experience nap time can be challenging for children coming from home. It could be that he was rocked to sleep, comforted with a pillow, suffed animal or blanket. However, in Child Development Centers the SIDS law does not allow us to put any extras in the crib. Also not being in his or her comfortable environment. We as adults are most comfortable sleeping in our own bed, and may... More

Suggestion on finding a baby-sitter?

Hi Parents, any suggestions on reliable ways to find a baby-sitter? We have a two-year old and will occasionally need a babysitter beyond the regular day-care time. What is a good way to do this? Any suggestions appreciated!

  • PK
    Aug 19

    We used sittercity.com. I would’ve felt more comfortable finding a sitter that one of our friends or family knew... but we were in the situation that everybody we knew that has kids didn’t have a sitter. We just paid for a month subscription, interviewed a few people and found one person we really liked. And then found a “backup” sitter. We let her know that she was our backup that we were go... More

  • aurora
    Aug 21

    Thanks so much, PK! how is the website compared with the care.com, which is also subscription based?

Anonymous posted in Education Aug 17

To go back to work or not

I am currently about to start (pre reqs) nursing school and I’m a sahm. Recently I received a job offer that pays decent but 10:30am-7pm which I really have to work around with class schedule. I can do it so I might take an online class and a very early class or go on Saturday as well. Pro of going back to work: making my own money Con: conflicts with class and I’ll be away from the my babi... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 19

    I just finished my pre reqs for the nursing program. I work, but I just notified my job that during school, 30 hours a week is my max. It may be nice to make your own money, but the way I see it is the degree is more important. Once I finish college and get a job in my field I'll be better off, so if I have to sacrifice the job now then so be it. I also know that for me, I could not do bare... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 19

    Thank you! I decided to decline the offer. It sucks but it’ll be worth having more time to study and be with my babies. I’ll make the money once I’m done 😁

ILAN posted in Child Care Aug 08

First time leaving son in daycare

Hi guys My son is 15months and now i am going to work leaving him in daycare ..I am worried that he is always around my legs wherever i go..never left my sight and always wanting me near him..But he loves to grab attention from strangers n says hi n gives hi5 and socialize so well...And people tell he is a very baby always with smile...my concern is will he manage being in daycare without me t... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 08

    I’d defintely start with a couple half days, maybe a few mornings and then a few afternoons so he can see the routine for each. Maybe come for lunch the first couple of full days. It will defintely be an adjustment but he’s at the besssssst age (in my opinion) for day care! Sooooo much play play play, he’ll have a blast 😁 try not to worry, he may do better than you think!

  • anonymous mom
    Aug 09

    It will be okay!!! My daughter has been in daycare since 12 weeks of age and even so, she is still just like your son with me at home. She’s either wrapped around my legs, in my arms, or up on the counter “helping” me cook at least 80% of the time. Even so, she has thrived at daycare. She loves it. The age you’re starting your LO at is about as perfect as you can get, in my opinion. It was s... More

Katie posted in Child Care Aug 06

In home daycare

Are most in home daycares licensed? Or is it mostly just the bigger places that are? I.e. kinder care, Montessori, etc.?

  • B
    Aug 06

    Many aren’t where I am. Some are. You can find a list online

  • Jess
    Aug 06

    In FL they have a state website listing all licensed home daycares as well as the inspections/violations. Maybe your state has something?

Anonymous posted in Child Care Aug 03

Bite marks

I picked my LO from her daycare center on Friday and I noticed she had a bite mark on her face so I asked her teacher if she knew what happened and this seems like a bite mark, I was told by her teacher that she had no idea what happened and it doesn't seem like a bite mark it seems like she might have bumped her head. I then went and talked to the administrator and I was told by her that i... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 04

    I would remove my little one after finding a suitable daycare replacement. You might want to also inform the other parents as well, your local investigative news person or BBB. This way all the other parents are made aware of how the daycare is handling a parent (which could one day be them).

  • Mika
    Aug 09

    This happened to my son at the daycare. Another baby bit him quite badly, the bitemark actually stayed for 2 weeks. However, I was immediately informed by the caregiver that my son was bitten by other kid (without mentioning the other kids name, and its a policy we agreed on). But then we bumped into a parent the next day and she immediately apologized for what happened, and that’s how we figu... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care Aug 02

Toddler Injuries at Daycare

How often is your toddler injured at daycare? I don't mean major injuries. But it seems that it's a pretty regular occurrence that I get a phone call telling me another kid bit my son, or hit him on the head with a toy and he has a bump, etc. So, I'm just wondering how often is typical for a toddler to have "incidences" like that to warrant a phone call because there's a mark?

  • Stacey
    Aug 10

    My kid likes to run faster then the rest of him can keep up with. He gets a lot of little bumps and bruises. Day care is good at letting us know he still likes going so I'm sure it's normal kid bumps. Does your kid still like going to daycare? If not you might try probing a little more on what's going on.

  • Kristen
    Aug 15

    The state ratio of toddlers aged 12 months to 2 years, is 6 children per 1 adult. I don’t know about you, but I have a hard time just keeping my 1 from getting hurt. Let’s try to remember that at this age they can’t verbally express their feelings, so unfortunately, the only way is to hit, bite, push, etc. Children at this age are also learning their environment and what the expectations are. S... More

Bethany posted in Behavior Aug 01

Advice?

I recently went back to work after about 6 months of staying home with my little one (age 2). She is okay when I leave in the morning but when I get home she has been super clingy. To the point where I can’t even walk to another room without her screaming. Bed time is a nightmare. I’ll put her down to bed and she will just cry and cry if you let her. I even tried to let her cry it out and after... More

  • Katie
    Aug 01

    My son has been going to daycare from 6 months, he is almost 3. He goes through periods where he gets really hard to drop off. My husband and I: 1) Reinforce repeatedly when, and which one of us is picking him up. (After lunch, after nap time, ect) 2) Reinforce mommies and daddies always come back. 3)Reinforce we love him, and have a hug/kiss routine. 3)Make sure we always get him by when we to... More

  • Vanessa
    Aug 02

    My son was the same way but what helped us was practicing waiting by walking into other rooms throughout the day. I had his dad count with him while he waited and since we were doing it so often it helped him get past it and understand I would come back. Best of luck! :)

Help questions for sahm

Looking for an income ASAP from home. I use to do deliveries but was put on bed rest and now there’s no income coming in. I live with my mom for now until I get back on my feet. What should I do for income ?

Anonymous posted in Making Friends Jul 29

No social life

Is it just me or is motherhood really lonely? I literally go weeks where I have no contact with anyone other than my husband, my sisters, or my mom. I work from home so I have no work friends. We moved when we had kids and I have one friend here and lots of acquaintances. I know other moms are busy but it feels like no one even tries to get to know me. Like, no one even asks me questio... More

  • Anonymous
    Jul 31

    Thank you for the response! It makes me feel a little less alone. I live in a rural midwest town so I guess location doesn’t matter too much. I agree there isn’t much time in the day to miss having a friend but other times it feels brutal. It feels like my kids connect with the kids of people I connect with. However, I rarely connect with anyone and same for them! Here’s to making s... More

  • Hayley
    Aug 02

    I feel you too! I work from home as well about 30 hours a week and take care of my son alone Tuesday-Saturday. My mom and dad are not as involved with my son as I thought they would be. Sometimes I feel really lonely, but I’m not really sure what to do about it.

Sara posted in Child Care Jul 26

Do you like having an au pair?

I’m moving into a house with an extra bedroom and bathroom and am considering the possibility of getting an au pair. They’re much less expensive than a nanny but the downside is they are living with you 24/7. If you’ve had one, what are the pros and cons? I’m concerned that the au pair might be looking to me to provide them with a social life and frankly I’m pretty boring and don’t get out much... More

  • Katie
    Aug 01

    What are the costs for an aupair? Is the salary in addition to room and board and food. I’ve considered it numerous times but can’t wrap my head around the true cost.

  • Jenny
    Aug 01

    It cost about $20,000 for the first year. You need to pay the agency around $8,000 You pay the au pair $200/week ($10,400/yr) You cover up to $500 of educational costs This is not required but it's assumed you will want your au pair to have a cell phone so you need to pay for that. You need to pay to put her on your car insurance if she'll need to drive. Basically the only thing you d... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care Jul 26

Husband refuses to put our toddler in daycare

We have a 17 month and 6 month old. Currently my husband works and goes to school and I go to school part time. I’d like to start nursing school and get a job but it is so hard with little ones. Either my mom or mother in law watch our kids if one of us can’t. MIL gets busy with her own work and other grandkids and traveling and my mom is starting a business so we don’t have a guaranteed baby s... More

  • Anonymous
    Jul 27

    Then he can stay home with the kids while you work and go to school. It's not fair for him to ask that of you.

  • Brianne
    Jul 31

    He 👏🏼 is 👏🏼 not 👏🏼 your 👏🏼 boss 👏🏼 he 👏🏼 is 👏🏼 your 👏🏼 partner. If kids don’t stop his dreams they don’t get to stop yours!

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