Working Parents

Working parents have two jobs — one at home with their children and one at their place of business. Learning to balance it all is a tough but rewarding process.

This is a place to for working moms and dads to share experiences and get advice, whether it's tips on work-life balance or help finding child care.

Anonymous posted in Child Care Friday

1st time Daycare for 13 mos old

Unfortunately, I’ll be placing my 13 mos old babygirl in daycare in a few weeks. With all the scary stories about daycares, I was skeptical. But with no help, I don’t have a choice. Any good advice or tips to help an anxious mommy?

  • Dan
    Yesterday

    We put our daughter in daycare for the first time a few months ago when she was 15 months. Nerve-racking for sure! Berry Sweet daycare of 7 and Johnson is where we decided to go. Seemed the best place with the best staff after going to see 4 different places. We have not been disappointed at all and love the staff and Sara(who owns and runs it).

Anonymous posted in Breastfeeding Friday

Hand-me down haakaa breast pump?

If I boil it, is it safe?

  • Jade
    Friday

    I would think that as long as it’s not very old and there aren’t any cracks in the silicone (meaning the silicone looks strong and isn’t breaking down) then boiling it should be fine.

  • Jessica
    Yesterday

    I think using the pump would be ok, but would suggest getting replacement attachments. Bacteria can grow in the tubes if they aren’t properly cared for, boiling those parts might not be enough.

FTM seeking daycare with a couple of concerns

I’m a FTM to a wonderful 22 mo son. I’m interested in child care to promote more sociability (for him and myself lol) a few days a week. He interacts well with people in general, all the normal milestones regarding attachments. He goes to our church’s child care facility during services and we’ve used a YMCA onsite child care facility in the past (where his usual caregivers are out of sight). M... More

  • Amanda
    Thursday

    Thank you all for your comments and suggestions! Yes, we are only doing milk in the mornings and at night only (we’re a huge fan of milk in our house, both his father and me grew up loving it).He drinks lightly flavored water that I drink throughout the day. He also enjoys smoothies (something that I enable because I enjoy them as well) so I understand where I went wrong lol. I only allow smoot... More

  • Jenn
    Thursday

    While this isn't 100% related to your question, have you ever had him evaluated by a speech pathologist for the feeding habits? He could have a sensory feeding disorder, which is why he is so affected by textures, colors, and shapes of food. He is young enough where intervention now could really be beneficial. On another note, I'm with you with the sippy cup debacle. My LO won't dri... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care Thursday

Security blanket/stuffed animal

So my son is almost 15 months old. We have never spent any time apart. I’m a single mom, he sleeps in my bed, and we go everywhere together. There’s literally never a moment we’re not together. A security blanket/stuffed animal hasn’t been necessary and he hasn’t really taken to anything because I have always been there 24/7. He is going to start a Mother’s Day Out program in the fall 2 days a ... More

  • Kendall
    Yesterday

    Agree ^^ my son carries his puppy around day care ALL DAY LONG and they don’t mind a bit. So I also disagree the program wouldn’t allow it, I think it would be ok, especially if he’s new.

  • Jamie
    Yesterday

    I highly recommend role playing. It makes a huge difference when they know what to expect. Get a stuffed animal and pretend that you and your child are the parents. Drop the stuffed animal off and reassure him and kiss him goodbye. You might even have some activities to pretend that the stuffed animal will do while at MDO and some other stuffed animals to represent the kids. Then, switch roles.... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care Tuesday

Nickname dilemma

My sons name is William and we call him Liam. He just started daycare a month ago and everything has to be labeled with his real name and his papers have to have his real name etc. So upon starting I mentioned William is his real name but he goes by Liam. There are probably 3-5 teachers that are between his room and I know some call him by William and some Liam. My husband is really upset by ... More

  • CheerioMama
    Thursday

    My son is 9 months old and his name is Troy. We also call him TJ as his middle name starts with a J. He responds to both and your son is much older. I don’t think confusions will be a problem. Or if it is, it won’t be a problem for very long. Kids are smart.

  • PK
    Friday

    My son’s name is Ethan but we call him “poops” lol. He responds to both... when he responds. He’s always so occupied doing his own thing that he ignores us most of the time anyway. 😆

Sara posted in Child Care Tuesday

Be vocal at work about your child care obligations

I love this article by Emily Oster (author of Expecting Better and Cribsheet) about why parents should speak up about being parents and having child care obligations at work. I wish more parents felt comfortable sharing the realities of being a parent -- it helps pave the way for future parents and gives us all better work-life balance when we're just honest about it. https://www.theatlanti... More

  • Elle
    Wednesday

    @Anon, I feel ya, 10,000%

  • Katie
    Thursday

    This lights me on fire. I travel constantly for work, currently in Germany in fact. It never fails that I get asked constantly who is watching my children. I say my husband and everyone asks if he has help, like he isn’t a parent in his own right. Once more when colleagues or my own mother speaks of me they talk of my children and how they are doing not my professional life and accomplishments.... More

Would you have your child attend daycare if it wasn't necessary?

  • Nana
    Thursday

    The year before kindergarten. 3 mornings and lunch. But make sure you are having play dates, Sunday school, play groups and letting be with someone besides just you. Make sure you are reading, playing games, singing songs and crafts.

  • Anonymous
    Thursday

    It depends. If you need time for medical appointments, house repairs, or self-care and can afford it I think it’s a win-win to have a day or two or a few mornings of care. Parent gets time to focus on their health or home, and baby/child meets friends. There’s no shame in needing help- it takes a village

Elena posted in Child Care May 19

Daycare preschool

First time mom here. I'm a stay at home single mom how is that possible it is lol I live with a family member because I'm newly separated my question is since I was a stay at home mom while married I never considered day care well my son turned two and I think it would be good for him and me to go for a couple days a week is he too old ? Is day care mandatory what is the difference betw... More

  • Elena
    Monday

    Thank you so much

  • Maeghan
    Wednesday

    Try a Mother’s Day Out! I’m also a single SAHM (the looks I get when I say that 😂). I’m starting my son in the fall (he’ll be 18 months) and I’m going to work there for a little extra money. Mother’s Day Outs are typically 2 (sometimes 3) days a week and they don’t stay as long- usually 9-2. Not great for everyone but hoping it works for us! I’m not comfortable (and it’s unnecessary for us) put... More

Alternating whole milk brand

Hi everyone, First time mom here.. working mom.. My little one just turn one a couple weeks ago we have switched her to horizon cow whole milk. And she has been doing great. She still wakes up once at night to have one 4oz feeding. Now that we are giving her cows milk... it’s so hard to wake up warm her milk in the middle of the night since both my husband and I work full time jobs. I was wond... More

  • Stephanie
    May 19

    I’m a dental hygienist lol. We went right to water at night once he got teeth. To be honest I don’t even think he noticed much. Google baby bottle tooth decay. Going to bed with a bottle is no bueno. Let me know how it goes!! Good luck mana 👍

  • Jessy
    May 19

    Thanks Stephanie I will do tonight!

Mimi posted in Child Care May 17

Nanny Search

Hi there! I am a first time mom expecting in mid-September. My husband and I are looking to hire a full time live out nanny starting in January. Does anyone have any advice on the nanny search process? Did you go through an agency or find your own? I have been casually browsing Care.com and Via The Village and the process seems pretty complicated and time consuming. What was your experience and... More

Ruth posted in Child Care May 16

Co-op tracking and schedule tool?

Hi there! Does anyone have suggestions for the best way to track and schedule responsibilities and points for parents participating in a small informal co-op?

Kisses at daycare

Is there a policy at daycares for not allowing kids to kiss each other? My daughter loves kissing her friends at daycare and the teacher tells her not to do it and she gets upset every time it happens. What would you do??

  • Elle
    May 19

    Ditto everyone's comments. Definitely NOT okay. Where did she learn this from? If it was from home, suggest stop emulating it until she's old enough to understand the concept of consent. Start gently reaffirming now that it's,something she can do with you, but not at school.

  • Anonymous
    Monday

    Hi, second anonymous poster here. I just wanted to say one other thing, which is I think I know where you’re coming from. I’m a FTM to an only child and I sometimes have a hard time hearing anything “bad” about my daughter too. I feel like people (in this case, daycare teachers) are being too critical or maybe even judgmental and it upsets me. So in that way I do get it!! I’ve become a lot bet... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life May 16

Commute or move

Currently live in a town that we love with great schools, great walkable downtown, and our family is all within a few mins, but spouse is taking a job that is only 18 miles away, but the commute is about an hour because of awful traffic. He wants to move so we are within 5 mins of his office, and the schools are actually even better there, but it’s not the same feel. I love our town and it’s wh... More

  • Anonymous
    Monday

    K..... traffic really can kill the mood. We moved from Queens, ny to Colorado Springs and now southern Maryland and traffic is terrible. I can’t believe I tell my husband I miss Colorado Springs.

  • Anonymous
    Monday

    Yeah...it’s one thing if it’s back roads or something but we are stuck dealing w only 1 major highway that is always congested. Totally feel your pain! Although Colorado Springs is beautiful!

C posted in Behavior May 14

Baby won't eat or nap at daycare

I'm pretty sure the cause is that it is a new environment, new people, it's not home at all, and his family isn't there. It's louder at the daycare and there's always another baby crying at all times, as babies will do. And it's his first week there. That said, how do I stop all this from negatively affecting my baby? He won't eat or sleep there. He comes home starve... More

  • Anonymous
    May 15

    As the above post said, it’s just first week and sometimes it takes weeks if not months for kids to adjust. He’ll adjust to the way things happen at day care. Don’t worry about the staff thinking that he’s high maintenance; it’s their job to deal with new kids all the time. As long as they have a consistence schedule, he should come around soon. You can always talk to the providers to see how t... More

  • Elle
    May 19

    Give it time, he will adjust. In the meanwhile, keep really good,open.polite communication with all of his teachers.

Looking for daycare advice

My son starts daycare on the 20th of this month and I’m super nervous! I’m a first time mom and my son will just be turning 8 weeks old when he starts daycare. I’m looking for some tips from other parents who have been through starting daycare with an infant. How many bottles a day do you send to daycare for your child? I am breastfeeding and started pumping about 2 weeks ago. I’m getting mysel... More

  • Samantha
    May 14

    Thank you both for your comments! I dropped in to the daycare on Monday and put myself to ease a bit. They also recommended 5 bottles with 4 ounces in each. I’ve only breastfed directly so far and not given him any bottles so I wasn’t sure how much he was eating. We’re mixing it up between bottles of breast milk and directly breast feeding this week to get him accustomed to the bottle and to se... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care May 12

Sad and frustrated about our nanny possibly leaving

I’m not sure if our nanny is leaving but I get the sense she may be searching elsewhere. We’ve had her 1.5 years 3 days a week while I work 12 hour hospital shifts and she’s amazing. I’m currently pregnant with my second so we were discussing a pay increase from 15 to 19$ an hour for the fall when I go back to work and the plan to put our older daughter in preschool for 3.5 hours a day on the d... More

  • Stacy
    May 13

    I second what everyone else said. Just have an honest conversation with your nanny. She should know that you're not going to vengeful, but you need to know what her plans are so that you can be prepared. Maybe she is worried about the new baby or the time off while you're on maternity leave (not sure if this is your situation...just an idea if it is). Finding out her reason(s) for looki... More

  • Lily
    May 14

    I work as a nanny, and I would say just talk to her! I am not sure where you live but your pay sounds just fine to me! And until you talk to her you have no idea what could be going on in her life! But, if she does end up leaving your little one will be fine.

Vic posted in Child Care May 10

Preparing for Daycare

My 28 month old will be going to daycare after being home with me for all his life. I think he will do well but was wondering if anyone had tips for helping him adjust. Also if you have advice for what to look for in a good daycare/early learning center please let me know

  • Jess
    May 17

    My LO stayed home for 3 years as a only child. The struggle I had with putting him in daycare was being around so many children , it can be overwhelming. Does your LO have siblings or did he have lots of time playing with other kids? If yes then your good! If no then you’ll face the trouble I did , also it might be best to try a part time day. I realized early on my son may be to overwhelmed to... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care May 10

Mil jealous of babysitting

My daughter is 1 1/2 and I have left her with someone other than daycare 3 times. Two times my husband and once my cousin who is like a sister to me, the only person I trust and an Rn. We are going to a wedding tomorrow and my husband mentioned to his mother that my cousin was watching our daughter. She asked why she couldn’t and what the problem was and my husband was like “eh she just wants... More

Anonymous posted in Child Care May 02

How to deal with guilt when a family member is your primary child care?

For those that have a grandparent watching baby during the day, how did you deal with the guilt of the expectation that their help is no longer needed once you/spouse gets home? Aka, you don’t want them staying for dinner even though it seems natural (and that grandparent is single which makes the guilt even worse)? Oh and let’s make it harder. You’re asian 😂

  • Rob
    May 19

    You can say it straight forward and explain to them that you appreciate them and once you or your spouse is home you would like to have time alone with your kid(s).

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