Relationships

This just in — parents need friends their own age too. Fight the isolation of parenthood by staying connected with your family & friends.

Discuss and share insights about nurturing and navigating your adult relationships, from your spouse to your in-laws to your friends and family.

Anonymous posted in Making Friends Yesterday

Losing a close friend because you two differ in Momming

i recently became a mom and my best friend has been a mother for a while now. When i became a mom, i feel like everything i do, she merely laughs at, and acts as though i’m being over zealous. She became a mother very young and admits, she had no idea what she was doing with her first kid. I spend a lot of time (i do go out with friends and my spouse here and there, and work from home) with my ... More

  • Holly Garnett-Pedreira
    Yesterday

    Try sitting her down and explain how you're feeling.. if she doesn't apologize, understand and change her ways.. then I would cut her out of my life.

  • Mackenzie
    2h ago

    People grow apart. It happens. Sucks but your priorities are different now. You need to do what is best for you and your family. She doesn’t sound like someone that will take constructive criticism very well but you could try talking to her if you really want to save your friendship.

Anonymous posted in Family Planning Yesterday

What made you decide to have more than 2 kids?

My husband & I are in our 30s (early 30s & late 30s) & we just had our 1st baby this year. It’s been a spontaneous topic within family & friends how many kids are we having. Of course we want 2 at least, we both do want to have a bigger family. But we both know having more kids has its pros & cons to the family. Just curious w/ other couples/parents out there, what made you ... More

  • Kimmy
    4h ago

    Pregnant with my third now.. I have a 5 and just turned 3 year old. It’s busy but great. We felt like we wanted more and with my 3 year old going to nursery this sept, now is the perfect time for us since both boys will be in school. I think it’s a very personal decision. Listen to you heart. There was something inside of us that told us we weren’t done having babies, and I’m about to be 34 so ... More

  • Anonymous
    55m ago

    My three are 7, 4, and 1. Exactly three years apart, almost to the day. We had #3 because we just didn’t feel “done” yet. We do have that “done” feeling now. 🙂 Our #3 has added so much joy to all of our lives. She is a high maintenance baby (no health issues, just a personality that demands more attention and energy than my first two children) so the first 9 months I felt stretched very thi... More

When our girls were young:

We played games, watched cartoons and lots of kid/ Disney movies, went to gymnastics and cheer, read and made up stories of Shirley the squirrel for my youngest. To this day ( they are 22& 19) we still play games, go to football games, rodeo, and movies together. We like to all go as family to new Marvel, Jurassic Pirate or Wizzard movies together. Ticket to Ride and Harry Potter game ... More

Cara posted in Adoption Friday

my 4 year old niece

So i am currently fostering my 4 year old neice (actually shes my boyfriends sisters little girl) i am having such a hard time with it. I love her so much but i also have a bio son and i feel how the connection is different. Her mom has severe paranoid schizophrenia and substance abuse problems cause her to loose this beautiful girl. She has been living with us for 8 months and with out her mom... More

  • Cara
    Yesterday

    Thank you Amy!

  • Amy
    Yesterday

    You’re welcome cara. Good luck!

Anonymous posted in Family Planning Friday

Gender disappointment

I understand that I am incredibly fortunate to have two children when others have none at all due to unfortunate circumstances. However, my husband and I know that we will not be having anymore children, we have two beautiful boys that we are absolutely crazy about, but I have been having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I will never have a daughter. Since I am not a male, I canno... More

  • Hannah
    Yesterday

    My MIL had 4 boys (tried for a girl on the third and ended with twins). She definitely has a hard time adjusting to her sons caring about women more than her, and not having a daughter that comes to her for parenting advice, etc. However, she lived her life as the queen of the castle. With a loving husband that taught their boys how to respect and admire women, you can tell she had a wonderful ... More

  • Anonymous
    Yesterday

    Thank you for your words of encouragement, I didn’t even think as far into the future as to possibly having a granddaughter. Probably because I’m so in the thick of mothering young ones right now that I’m just minute by minute!

Anonymous posted in Behavior Wednesday

Less love

Baby is 18mo and I just feel my husband is not the same anymore, less funny, less relaxed, more stressed. Anyone has the same?

  • Joanne
    Wednesday

    Dads can get baby blues too but for different reasons

  • Anonymous
    7h ago

    Mine did, a bit of an adjustment period and simply pushing family out of our lives so we could figure out our new norm (tho, they are back when I go back to work... grandmas are caretakers...). He’s also been smoking marijuana at nighttime, more often, but I don’t oppose, bc it really takes off the edge for him and he’s much more pleasant!

Anonymous posted in Family Life Tuesday

A little ranting

Hey everyone! So, I’m just going to rant a little bit. Ok, so I’m 16 weeks pregnant with twins. I also have two older children ( 7&5) and I feel like my husband always lets his mom do all the fun stuff with the kids. I’m trying so hard to spend as much time with and do fun stuff while I can. But no one understands why it upsets me. She took them both to the beach alone ( I wasn’t invited) e... More

  • Melissa
    Wednesday

    This is my life. You’ve explained my exact issue. I also feel like my MIL wants to be “too close” to my son, like she’d like to be his mom

  • Anonymous
    Thursday

    Yesssss Melissa! Exactly

Anonymous posted in Family Planning Tuesday

Considering a Vasectomy

Any guys on here who are considering a vasectomy or have already had the procedure. I am wanting to know: duration of procedure and recovery time, which method did you receive and were there any changes to sexual health. Ladies feel free to comment if your significant other has had this procedure done or is considering this option.

  • Anna
    Friday

    Lol I had heard that before, but do your own research-sometimes small studies get taken out of context. If the sample size wasn’t that big, I would look to other studies that are bigger! Good luck 🍀

  • Anonymous
    Yesterday

    So, mine took about 30 mins, was rougher than expected, lots of bruising which faded after about 2 weeks. Was "effective" in achieving the aim , but I now have constant pain on one side. Was told to just take ibuprofen before sex to minimize the pain afterward but that is not a great solution. Not a huge deal but not ideal. 3 years on and it's still a problem. Went to one of t... More

Anonymous posted in For Moms Tuesday

Sex Drive

Any fixes for complete loss of sex drive? I love my husband and am attracted to him but I can't get myself to want sex even a little. I'm EBF and postpartum 4 months. I'm tired of the fights it's causing plus I think it just makes my husband feel sad :( any suggestions would be appreciated

  • Amber
    Yesterday

    I agree with Jenn. I have always had a very low sex drive and what I find helpful is to sit down and explain that sex =/= love. Explain that your body is still going through changes and it may take a while for your body to want sex again. Otherwise have you tried for play that usually helped me get in the mood.

  • Amber
    Yesterday

    @dominique I have done what you done in just laying there and takeing it and it was not very fun. I would suggest trying to explain that sex =/= love and that you still love him but just don't want to have sex right now. If you would like you can pm me to talk about it.

Anonymous posted in Family Planning Tuesday

Haha oops. 😬

So, I had a c-section 4.5 months ago, and I’ve been told it’s dangerous to get pregnant again until at least 6 months pp. We had a slip up, and I’m not on birth control. If I get pregnant is it risky? Anyone have similar situation? I’m freaking out! Help!!!

  • Mackenzie
    Tuesday

    There are definitely risks but then again there are plenty of risks with a normal pregnancy. Many people have had kids very close together successfully otherwise I doubt there would be a term for it (ie Irish twins). Try not to stress because that can be just as bad for a pregnancy. Good luck!

  • Elle
    Wednesday

    @Mackenzie - the decline in fetal growth is likely due to restricted/diverted blood flow.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Monday

A normal after work routine- with child

I work a 8-5 job. And am exhausted by the time I get home. Just wondering what others do with their kids after work. I usually let my child watch a little tv while I prepare dinner, straighten up a bit. Then it’s bath time, books and sleep. Just feeling like I should be doing more with her.

  • Shalay
    6h ago

    I have the same schedule and issue. I constantly feel maybe I should do more. Reading all if these suggestions help so much. I agree with everyone else you are doing great and kids know that your there for them and love thme

  • Dan
    3h ago

    There’s a lot of great stuff here about getting the kids to help, quality over quantity etc. I would add that it’s not your job to entertain your kids, but to raise them. That means modeling behavior. Every moment you in sight or sound of your kids you are parenting. When you run the evening routine, you are showing them your values, responsibility, and love. When they are whining it’s oven ... More

Jackeline posted in Sex Monday

Boy talk?

My soon to be 12 year old keeps bring up boys. Her friends are all dating but I think it’s way to young for her to have a boy friend. Is it me or am I being to way over protective? I all ready had all the mom and daughter talks about sex and going through young womanhood? What are your thoughts and how can I also bring this up to my husband without him losing his bananas?

  • T
    Tuesday

    I think 12/ middle school in general is to young to “date”, “go out”.

  • Alissa
    Tuesday

    Agree on the "boyfriend" aspect. However, what she is thinking about and feeling is completely normal for her body, at her age. I would certainly try your best to just listen to her talk about boys, her feelings, thoughts and her friends. Try not to advise, offer your opinion or get upset. Ask her, instead about how it makes her feel, what she thinks her friends think and feel and an... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Sunday

Had enough!

I’m falling more and more out of love w my husband of 7 years(today actually). We have a 3 mo old and a 2 yr old. Intimacy doesn’t exist. Lacks compassion. We have nothing in common. He’s boring to be around. His idea of spending time w the kids is sitting on his ... , scrolling his phone, while the kids turn into zombies watching tv. I run around the house to prepare for the next day while he ... More

  • Kerri
    Monday

    Pray for him. Go out on a girls date & have him take care of all the necessities that you usually do. Maybe even show him a family that doesn't have what you guys have...imagining how our children see their childhood could be an eye opener if they dont remember him bonding with them. Also...my older wiser friend told me a long time ago, before I was married, that the biggest gift he cou... More

  • Deanna
    Wednesday

    I know this sounds random, but I have a good marriage and a super helpful husband- but life in general and with young kids is hard. I’ve always wanted to stand guard and stay strong in our marriage and found this website (they have an Instagram account too called Marriage365) https://marriage365.org/ Anyway, they have sooo many recourses from communicating well, to sex, money etc. And I have ... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Sunday

Anyone else have loss of sex drive after having baby?

I am 7 months postpartum, and still have little to no drive. I am still breastfeeding, so I know that has something to do with it hormonally. This was the same with our first child. When I went to the doctor after first baby I talked with him about that and how I would get angry easily. He said it's probably just loss if sleep and that will change with more sleep. After our second child, I&... More

  • Amber
    Yesterday

    I must warn about any sexual disorder. While it could be hypoactive, it could also be that a person is asexual. Asexual means that you don't have any sexual attraction towards anyone and is perfectly normal. Now bf mom's of young ones it's most likely the hormones. And of course you can always talk to your doctor. But please don't ever think that there is something wrong with yo... More

  • Trinity
    4h ago

    I just want to encourage anyone reading this to remember that Sex is a way of giving love to your significant other even when you don’t feel like you have a sex drive. I’m 10 months postpartum and still breastfeeding so I have lost the desire but I enjoy being intimate with my husband anyway because I’m expressing my love for him and receiving affection. I encourage you to think about Sex diffe... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Aug 10

Marriage in a rut.

My marriage is in a rut. Especially in sex. My husband works and travels a lot and I stay at home with our son. My hubby works long hours, but is a very active Dad and a good husband. He helps with meals and cleans too. He works at night sometimes which is fine to me since he is the provider. I feel so emotionally disconnected from him since our son was born (son will be two in Dec) and we ... More

  • Lulu
    Aug 11

    Ooh, family night walks :)

  • Ashley
    Aug 11

    There is a marriage app called lasting. Its pretty good.

Mil will not stop buying baby clothes

Do any of you have a mother in law who buys you so many freaking clothes even though you have told her multiple times that you have 3 different people giving you hand-me-downs and thus literally have no more room to store clothes?! If so, do you continue to accept the clothes knowing that the kid will never wear them? Or do you give them back so that she can return them? Or I guess I could keep... More

  • Anonymous
    Aug 09

    The list is amazing. I had to be clear that it was ideas, so if they saw stuff on sale or at Kohls that is similar to go for it. But a great way to show what we need, and what toys my daughter likes at different ages.

  • JJ
    Aug 09

    I don’t do showers or anything like that and am uncomfortable with people buying me gifts so if they continue to do so I donate everything and let them know I am doing so.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Aug 09

Mother in law

I know my mother in law is way nicer then most. I know she means well. I dont think she means to be ugly but... I do wish my husband wouldn't go to her for everything. It's always about not upsetting her. Last weekend he drove 85 mph to get to her house so she wouldn't be upset we were a little late. Or Christmas I asked to stay home and visit family Christmas eve an I heard my mom... More

  • Diana
    Monday

    This is the issue you need to resolve with your husband. He has to make adjustments and set boundaries

  • Anonymous
    Friday

    This is in-laws set #2. My first MIL was a witch. It wasn't until later that I learned she broke up FIL's first marriage, and that he almost left her when he found out she was pregnant with twins. There is no end to the evil and chaos she brought to my first marriage. Second set are still so preoccupied with the fact that I was divorced with two kids that they seem to overlook the fact ... More

Anonymous posted in Family Life Aug 09

Controlling parent as an adult?

I am in my 30’s and my mother acts very jealous and controlling of me. If I have a drs appt and don’t tell her, she questions who watched my kids or why she didn’t know. She will text me and say “we are coming over today” without asking if I’m busy or have plans. I always get a guilt trip about how we moved too far, when it’s only 13 miles away from them, and god forbid we don’t do what she wan... More

  • Angel
    Aug 09

    Thankyou for this post im dealing with this as well .awww man

  • Anonymous
    Aug 09

    It’s so hard! I try to empathize but the past 2 years have been worse than ever and no matter how much we tell her she needs counseling or a hobby or that she is not that old, she always throws these fits or nitpicks and causes fights. I feel like I truly cannot have my own life without her making me feel bad about it and if I push back, I get a call from my dad saying I upset her. It’s really ... More

Anonymous posted in In-Laws Aug 08

Mother in law

have 8 week old baby girl. My mom came and stayed with my husband and i for the first 2 weeks to help out. My mother in law came to the hospital to visit. Babysat twice so my husband and I can go out on a date. The funny thing is my mother in law calls me and ask if it's ok for her to come over and spend the two nights. I said, of course, and then she should feel free to visit anytime. Her ... More

  • JJ
    Aug 08

    Depends on the people and your relationship with them. Maybe MIL feels awkward around you or doesn’t want to upset you so that’s why she’s tiptoeing around. My MIL is not allowed in my house or to ever be alone with my children so she absolutely has to call ahead and ask permission to see them to make arrangements. She’s hours away. My mother is 8 hours away and calls to see if she can come... More

  • Elle
    Aug 08

    Sounds like she is trying to be considerate and respectful. That's really, really nice! Not everyone has that in in-laws or other family members. If you'd like her to be more involved and to spend more time together, tell her you'd love to spend more time together and act open and warm towards her.

Anonymous posted in Babies Aug 08

Husband doesn't bond with baby...

He would rather play video games or be on his phone... When i ask him to help out he gives me a look and acts annoyed. He won't change diapers and hates feeding him. Any advice? Is this normal for new dads? Baby is 5mo. Part 2... I try passing him but when he sees me coming with the baby he says "no no no ugh whhy" i feel that he just doesn't want to do it. I want them to bond... More

  • Daniela
    Aug 08

    I agree with some of the ladies above 1. Every father is different 2. Some men don’t like us bossing them around and hovering over them to see how they’re changing a diaper or feeding a bottle. Try to talk to your husband and set a little rule about less phone time more baby time at least an hour of playing, tummy time, and cuddling between them two. && for diaper changes- What I did wi... More

  • Beth
    Aug 09

    My husband is bad about games. He has even played 2 or 3 games at the same time on multiple devices. 🙄 I let him act this way at first. I finally had it and just handed him the baby and said " passing the torch. You take care of her." I stayed busy doing laundry and tried not to run to the rescue if she cried. He had to learn how to comfort her and she needed to learn he was comfort.... More

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