Parenting Culture

Share and discuss all things parenting whether it's good, bad, funny, or serious.

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Jun 12

Noticed bullying

My sister took her twin boys (2year olds) to a park yesterday. They were the only ones there .After some time, 4 boys around ages 10 to 12 came and 3 of them started bullying the one other boy. They were calling him dumb and hitting him with a ball and he was just sitting there red faced and silent. My sister didn’t know what to do. She wanted to intervene but was scared for her boys safety as ... More

  • Julie
    Saturday

    To the original poster, I disagree with the two most recent commenters. First of all, 10-12 year old boys are at the prime of pack mentality. One of them was the leader and the other two would have gone along with whatever he said. You have no idea how he would have reacted to you approaching them and trying to help the boy. Second of all, she was there with your two toddler aged children. It’... More

  • Anonymous
    Sunday

    Thanks Julie ❤️. My sister she was mostly thinking about her 2 kids . If she was alone she defiantly would have intervened .

Park bullies

What do you do when you are at the part with your 1.5 year old and she approaches bigger kids very excitedly and eager to see what they are doing and the older kids tell her that she can’t play with them or they don’t want her around or to find other babies to play with? 💔 We has a very sad experience at the park today and my heart broke for my daughter. I tried talking to the little girl sayi... More

  • PK
    May 26

    @jess - do you know what the episode is called or what season it’s on?

  • Kerry
    May 29

    I think the Daniel tiger episode is season 3 episode 22.

Kristen posted in Behavior May 24

Reward charts: Love 'em or hate 'em:?

How do you feel about reward charts? What do you use them for? Are they working? So my son is two and we just started using them. He seems to love them. He gets so happy when he gets a sticker. He hasn't even gotten to the reward part. So we have a help mama/daddy chart. Which is when he helps with chores. I mean actually help, if I do laundry he puts the clothes in the basket, takes the... More

  • Kristen
    May 29

    I hand made them

  • Dorothy
    May 30

    I use an app (ClassDojo) for my 6-year-old. There are different skills that have different point values (bigger skill, more points). And we have a list of rewards that she can “trade” points for. Right now, she’s at about 100 points and is trying to save for a bike which is 500 points. It’s super easy for us because I can always just pull out my phone to give her points and she enjoys working t... More

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture May 23

Birthday party RSVPs

We are having a birthday party for my son in 3 days.. I let my son invite the kids from his babysitters. He is 5 and has always gone there. There are about 10 kids and some are siblings... I knew a lot of people may decline because of the holiday weekend but only one parent has RSVP’d... I have no idea whether to plan on the others attending or not. It is okay either way but I would like ... More

  • Vonda
    May 30

    I always rsvp or at least let people know if I can’t make it asap. I know how important it is to plan for an event. I’d remind everyone to rsvp again. Some people need an extra nudge. Sometimes you have to say it face to face or over a phone call. It’s not a dying art. I always do rsvp for birthdays, our wedding, parties, etc. It makes sure I plan accordingly so there is less waste and knowin... More

  • Mysticnocturne
    Jun 05

    I agree with the people in support of RSVPing. I always do party favors, and I would hate for a kid to be left out because there are not enough, but I also don't want to buy 20 if only 5 kids are attending. I also like it when parents *ASK* is siblings can also attend and not assume that they can. I don't mind- as long as I know in advance- but again- I need to know numbers to make sure... More

Myrtle posted in Behavior May 22

Interesting article

My three-year-old is constantly asking me to tell her stories. I was getting tired of telling stories but my perspective on storytelling changed after reading this article. https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2019/03/13/XXX-XXXX53/a-playful-way-to-teach-kids-to-control-their-anger

Does anyone feel alone now that they haves kids ... I do

  • Kieli
    May 19

    I just had my second baby 2 weeks ago, and I forgot how isolated the newborn life is. It’s even worse with an almost 2 year old now. I want to so badly get her out to run around and interact with other children, but if she does then I risk getting my newborn sick. Thankfully I have family in town visiting until a little after June, but after then I will be home alone.

  • Kaitlyn
    May 19

    My son is 9mo old and I experienced something similar. I didn’t recognize how lonely I had become and how isolated I was until recently. I believe I had a bit of delayed postpartum depression because I was fine initially and then got progressively worse. I felt as though nobody cared and loved my baby as much as my family and I did and felt as though nobody wanted to be around us once he was bo... More

Love this!

"I love the framing of a “good birth,” because it removes the false dichotomy of "natural" versus "unnatural." The outcome everyone wants for their delivery is a healthy baby and a healthy mother. Health includes emotional health, too." https://www.nytimes.com/2019/05/07/parenting/natural-birth.html

  • Sara
    May 08

    Yes! I will add though that of course a healthy baby and healthy mother is the outcome everyone wants but it's not always the case that all babies are healthy and all mothers are healthy after birth and it's not your fault. Ultimately this isn't a process that you have a lot of control over and a lot of times you just have to accept the cards that are dealt.

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Apr 19

Name change

Has anyone changed their child’s name? How long was the process? Do you have to do it in the state they were born, or just where you live currently?

  • Vicki
    Apr 23

    That sounds like it should be simple. I would contact your local SSN office to start.

  • Dada G
    Apr 25

    There should be a form on your local courthouse website. In our county you also have to post a “public notice“ in the newspaper. It’s not hard. Basically if you can fill out your child’s day care paperwork or fill out your pediatrician paperwork, you can do it. About the time, once you fill out the paperwork you will get an appointment for a name change at the courthouse. I guess how long w... More

Play date etiquette

I have a 2 y/o and almost 5 y/o. Both are boys... we have not had a lot of playdates over the years and I feel like I have no clue what proper etiquette is.... we were invited over by a family with young kids. My kids were having fun and being active (chasing other kids in house) and loud (happily yelling in their play)... This kind of play doesn’t bother us unless it starts to veer out of... More

  • antigrav_kids
    Apr 26

    Thanks MamaNukesYopolo!

  • Naomi
    May 09

    Suggestion: Keep the play dates short and opt for out door play dates as your kids take time to get accustomed to standards of other people’s homes

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Apr 17

Baby advice! (long post)

Hi all! I just wanted to share some of my experiences with having a baby. My daughter was born in December and is now 4 months old. She’s a very easygoing baby (which I am forever grateful for!). However, in the short time I’ve been a mom, I have gotten a LOT of advice. Both good and bad. I’ve been told to sleep when the baby sleeps, which is a great idea up to a point. You can’t be expected to... More

  • cocomac
    Apr 18

    Don’t feel guilty to say no to people. It’s true when they say “they grow so fast”. My husband and I spent first 2 months saying yes and putting our family members happiness (she is first grand baby on both sides) before ours and we both now realize that we need to put our own happiness (and our own troubles) before our family members’. I actually am in therapy because I felt robbed of my mate... More

  • Jennifer
    Apr 25

    @Annie, I totally agree with you about the deep conversations. When my daughter was little, I'd talk to her all the time regardless if she understood me. It really helps with speech development. I still have a video of me saying "I love you" when she was 4 months old and she responded babbling, but the sounds really sounded like her saying "I love you" back. That is ... More

Yuyuita posted in Behavior Apr 10

Playground etiquette

Today I took my daughter to the playground she is 20 mo, she was gonna use the slide when a boy probably around 2 yo climbed back on the slide it was a dual slide so I thought it was enough space for both to play, when the boy got closer to her then stepped on my daughter’s hand and didn’t move so I proceed to move his foot from my daughters hand and said don’t do that, then finally I heard the... More

  • Yuyuita
    Apr 13

    My daughter didn’t cry but I wasn’t gonna wait until I had deal with a crying baby, right now she is going through a phase where she freezes when someone comes to close to her, there have been times where other toddlers come close to her to touch her or even push her but I can see clearly that is out of curiosity in those cases she just stands and do nothing so I just tell her come let’s go try... More

  • Izzy
    Apr 25

    I think you handled it great. I dont have any kids with agression issues, they are the ones getting hit when were out. I dont understand it, nor do I want to. I don't think it's the parents fault when they have a hitter, BUT if you know you have a hitter, then you stay off your phone and you remain vigilant and correct when need be. It isnt fair to those of us parents who dont have hitt... More

At what point am I no longer considered a first-time or new mom?

Is it once my baby is more than six months old? Is it after I have a second child? When did you stop referring to yourself as a first-time or new parent?

  • Amy
    Apr 11

    Funny, I don’t know! I think I stopped around my son’s first year. Not for any reason, it just stopped coming up.

  • Anonymous
    Apr 12

    Hmmm..no idea too..I agree..when you have more kids guess..I still feel like a first time mom and my kid is 3! Haha they're constantly changing and always keep your on your toes..everything that happens is the first time

Returning to Work

I have a job interview this coming week that could turn into a strong prospect if not an all out offer. My little one is 17 months old and I have stayed at home with her the entire time. I love my career and worked very hard for it to give it up for motherhood. I’m having a lot of conflicting feelings ... am I a bad mother? Is going back to work going to stress the bond I’ve already had difficu... More

  • Jen
    Mar 28

    Oh heavens no! Not at all a bad mother...is that even what people say anymore?? Moms work all the time!! You’re not gonna be the first.... There is no research out there that shows working parents somehow hurt kids. But there IS proven research that says kids with working mothers actually have benefits when they become adults. (Harvard Business Review, perhaps? Can’t recall...) Girls with work... More

  • annag
    Mar 28

    you need to be a good role model, by taking care of yourself first so that you can help others from a stronger stance. Yes, going back to work will be stressful, but then, so would staying at home full-time.

Anonymous posted in Family Life Mar 20

Unwanted baby name input...

My husband and I didn’t tell anyone what we were going to name our baby until after he arrived (partially due to the fact that we hadn’t decided yet). Now that I’m pregnant with baby #2, I’ve been more open when his family asks what our name options are... they’re pretty verbal about what they like and don’t like... and I keep finding myself getting offended. How should I respond to their sco... More

  • Stacey
    Mar 22

    My mom and sister hated our son's name when we chose it (Ronan) but they came around. We told them we liked it and he is our baby. To be honest I don't think they heard it correctly the first time.

  • Mark
    Mar 28

    We made up fake names that were so obnoxious, that it disarmed them. I also told many people they did not have review privileges.

Elle posted in Behavior Mar 19

Inuit Parenting Style

"With little kids, you often think they're pushing your buttons, but that's not what's going on. They're upset about something, and you have to figure out what it is." https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2019/03/13/XXX-XXXX53/a-playful-way-to-teach-kids-to-control-their-anger

  • Lulu
    Mar 19

    Amazing read! Thanks!

  • Elle
    Mar 19

    I guess our parenting style is French-Inuit then...

Parent guilt over growing twins

My Littles are 6 months on Thursday and they’re rolling over, crawling, teething, pulling up on the rails of their cribs and my Twin A is sitting up unassisted. How? They were just 4 & 5 pound little balls of human just the other day?! I feel so sad that I’m not feeling as present as I would like to be in this whole Twin Life thing. I’m never NOT busy though, and I’ve blinked and suddenly... More

  • Anonymous
    Mar 20

    Welcome to parenthood! A lifetime of parental guilt 🙂. It’s completely normal - just remember to focus on quality time over quantity.

  • Brigitte
    Mar 20

    You know, this is why I feel frustrated when people always look at me sagely and say, “enjoy it! Take it all in! It goes so fast!” I know they have the best intentions when they say that; but I’ve really come to feel that instead of encouraging me it just makes me feel guilty. Parenthood, ESPECIALLY in the first year, is so hard and emotionally challenging. One minute you’re wildly in love and ... More

Anonymous posted in Marriage & Partnership Mar 17

Need parents opinions

I'm a pretty damn good mom of twins but it gets hard a lot of the time. My S/O works a lot to provide for the family. It feels like he isn't doing what he should with the babies though. They're a little over a year old and I was hoping he would interact with them more. He basically gets home and says hello, gives hugs, kisses and every now and then will play with them for 5 or 10 mi... More

  • Anonymous
    Mar 18

    Of course other men spend time parenting their children while supporting the family. Parenting isn’t just providing financial support or putting roof on their heads or just buying food. I guess you fell in the roles of past times where u take care of kids n he works. If you want change you are gonna have to work at it. Your are not being harsh and unappreciative; the father needs to do his half... More

Working Mothers

https://www.forbes.com/sites/kateashford/2015/06/30/working-mother/

  • Anonymous
    Feb 08

    I’m very proud of my single working mom, and always glad she had more to occupy her than my settling down and having babies- most of my friends’ moms seemed to pressure their kids, and I felt it was because they were bored housewives- and I decided to put my career on the side, and take up odd freelance work, because I still felt the deep yearning to simply be with my mother. She was always so ... More

  • Mrs. HHH
    May 22

    Thank you for sharing! Very inspiring

Just a thought

I’m sitting here on our bed while my husband is putting out hysterically crying baby. He’s so patient, she keeps getting up and crying and he just softly tells her it’s okay that he’s there and wow. Extremely thankful for him ❤️💛

  • Elle
    Jan 24

    My husband is the same way. Its good to be thankful for each other, esp when one partner can step in to help other the other!

Anonymous posted in Family Life Jan 22

Raising a baby without family near

Husband and I live in Kansas, my family lives in Canada and his in California. It’s way more affordable to buy a house here so we want to raise a family here so we can provide more. Anyway, calling out all moms and dads raising babies without family near. Just want to hear your experiences with working, nannies, and not having that support nearby. Cause a strain on your relationship? Should... More

  • Mandy
    Jan 25

    It is not a strain on our marriage, however we can’t afford a nanny (and I don’t trust people with my child). It is hard, I miss alone time with my husband. But we have a solid family unit, and our son is awesome when we go out places. I guess in my experience if your relationship is strong you can make anything work. Sure it’s hard and I would love to be able to leave our son with a grandparen... More

  • Al
    Apr 18

    Wow this sounds just like our situation! We are from Ca and moved to north central Kansas to raise our now 2 yo girl because of the cost of living as well as a lot of other things I didn’t want her exposed to in Ca- issues come with high populations- not just Ca. I have also been a SAHM since she was born and I cannot imagine it any other way but it was absolutely not possible in Ca with their ... More

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