Parenting Culture

Share and discuss all things parenting whether it's good, bad, funny, or serious.

Cassie posted in Money Tuesday

Curious about $$ etiquette

Do you send $$ with your child when you know another parent is taking them to the fair or other activity and if so what is the $used for? For example is the money only for toys your child wants? And if your child doesn't spend all the money do you expect it back when you pick them up? Or do you expect this extra cash will have gone for entry fees, food etc...

  • Anonymous
    Wednesday

    My son isn’t of age for this yet. But my mom would get the parent money, usually a 20 dollar bill if we were going to the fair or things like that. She never gave it to me, and didn’t expect money back.

  • Carolyn
    Wednesday

    If I'm doing the inviting, then I will pay for the child's entrance fee or movie ticket or whatever it is. I usually tell my kids' friends' parent if they want anything extra to bring money for a snack, etc. When I send my kids somewhere with a friend, I usually send them with money & tell them what it is to be used for. They've done well with those instructions. Then I... More

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Aug 09

Only child

Any parents of only children or an only child themselves out there? I never imagined that I would only have one child but as the days pass, the thought of “starting over” makes me want to sob hysterically. I wouldn’t say my daughter is/was a bad baby but she most certainly is not easy-going by any means. We’ve had a horrible time with sleep, I haven’t slept in over a year and she really is the ... More

  • Amanda
    Wednesday

    Me and my husband thought we would only have one child after having one.. I had PPD.. and we just didn’t feel ready.. when my son turned 3 we decided to just have another! He was pretty self sufficient and all the baby stuff was long behind us..Starting over was easy!!And I now have a 8 month old daughter! My labor was amazing I had no PPD and she is the sweetest .. I couldn’t imagine life wit... More

  • Amanda
    Wednesday

    Me and my husband after having one child thought we were done..my Labor was long and hard I had PPD and I couldn’t imagine starting over again.I also could not get the breastfeeding down, I lasted 2 weeks! my whole family new I was “done” I just can’t do it again!! But when he was around 3 yrs old, I read an article and the lady said she choose to have another child because the 0-2yrs that it... More

Pet Peeve....

Parents/families that feel they own public places.... like parks and playgrounds. Recently had a family try to bully myself and my children because they “were there first”, and “we come here more often.” I was so furious I barely handled the situation. Say what you will to me, but being condescending, with snide attitudes with my children will not fly. What would you do in that instance? H... More

  • Sarah
    Aug 08

    In my head I would be saying “Who made you king of the playground???” but in real life I would probably either take my kids to another part of the playground or to another park all while using it as a teaching moment with them that being mean like that is lame!

  • Mel
    Sunday

    I'm a very confrontational person even though my mother instilled in me that sometimes it's better to be the bigger person. I've had to (loudly) explain to my SS that even though the kids bullying him were wrong and the parents were wrong for not correcting their behavior, that sometimes you have to walk away and be the bigger person. It took everything in me not to scream at the pa... More

Elle posted in Child Care Jul 30

What are folks favorite ways to show appreciation for daycare workers?

We love our daycare - they adore our little one, she adores them, and she is learning and developing and socializing so, so well. What are people's favorite ways to show appreciation? There are several ladies who care for our little one (with two main ladies).

  • B
    Jul 30

    Lunch, if that’s in the budget. Breakfast treats are always nice too.

  • Julie
    Aug 06

    For Christmas I gave my daughters main teachers both an amazon card. They seemed pleased.

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Jul 30

My hubby tells our 17m/o she’s cute. I want her to know she’s brave and smart. Any advice or articles?

  • Ali
    Aug 09

    You're smart You're brave You're strong You're beautiful. Thats what we tell my daughter (17mos). Not all at once, but we do incorporate them into our daily lives.

  • Anonymous
    Aug 09

    Thank you everyone for your input! I don’t mind telling my daughter she’s cute or beautiful but was just looking for suggestions of variety I could offer/strategies and resources you’ve all used. Thanks so much!

Motherhood in the Age of Fear

Incredibly sad and terrifying at the same time. If only we could get rid of a lot of laws and start being decent to each other again. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/27/opinion/sunday/motherhood-in-the-age-of-fear.html

  • Shannon
    Aug 03

    Those who say NEVER leave your child unattended in the car - too risky - did you actually read the referenced article? If you had, you would have that it really is not as dangerous in certain situations, statically speaking, as you believe.

  • JJ
    Aug 03

    Just because statistics say it isn’t likely to happen doesn’t mean it won’t or that I can’t do everything in my power to prevent it. That’s why you have a fence around your pool, car insurance, baby gates, goggles, teach your kids how to swim, protective gloves, car seats, seat belts, air bags, brakes on your stroller, etc.... shit happens.

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Jul 29

"Looks like you got your hands full!" "Busy Lady"

I need your advice, virtual hugs and support before I snap at somebody... Every morning I go on a fast paced walk with my 14 month old in the stroller and my two well behaved dogs. It doesn't fail that at least one person will make a comment about me having my hands full, buying a busy lady, and other variations of the same comment. WTF! This makes me feel bad, self-conscious and uncomfo... More

  • Lucy Kent
    Aug 02

    I always thought of these comments as coming from a place of either admiration or solidarity. That said, it always gives a little more pride and puts a spring in my step. Since we can't know for sure what their meaning, maybe try to look at those comments from this perspective. I find it hard to believe that so many ppl would try to demean your efforts when you're obviously doing a marv... More

  • Omaira
    Aug 02

    i agree with Lucy Kent. i get those comments all the tome. i have 3 kids and my youngest is 1.9. I go on runs at my local park trail with my 2 girls (6 & 10)on their bike, my chihuahua and my son on the stroller. i feel like its a compliment since its an obvious fact to me that my hands ARE full but i am a good multitasker.

Anonymous posted in Clothes Jul 28

How do you approach "appropriate dress" questions for young girls?

This is far in my future but I was wondering how do you talk with daughters as they get older about different styles of dress. I'm of the mindset that girls should wear what they want (no bodyshaming) but should also be aware of the reactions the world may have to their choices. Most of these reactions aren't their problem and they're not to blame but seems like being proactive and ... More

  • Jule
    Aug 01

    No body shaming is a wonderful idea. However, there may still be clothes that are inappropriate for some locations and body types. For example, my daughter is 5’7”(she doesn’t get that from me) with long legs. There are miniskirts and short shorts that are popular right now. If she wears these, her butt shows. This embarrasses her! We usually try to hunt for longer, just above the knee sk... More

Vicki posted in Behavior Jul 27

Playtime

To parents of toddlers, what do you do when your kid is playing with something and another kid snatches it from your kid and the other parent either doesn’t see or doesn’t say anything? This happened today and I stood back to let my kid try and figure it out. He was definitely taken aback and a little upset but he didn’t say anything and eventually picked up a different toy. I’m glad he didn... More

  • Amelia
    Aug 02

    My mom said that when I was little like 4 my moms friend ( not anymore) came to the house and brought her 6 year old daughter and she picked up my favorite plushie that was a mouse in red overalls named Murray and I snatched it back cause I had it right after I was born but I snatched it from her and she ran and told her mom and I sat in the room and her mom said to her “if she snatched it agai... More

Here's your daily toy-purging inspiration

A mom friend of mine is a hardcore minimalist and she just shared this post about managing toy creep. She has — brace for it — only TWELVE toys for her 2 kids. 12 toys in TOTAL. I have 12 toys under my couch right now. I especially love this part: "So how do we make up for the lack of toys? Here's our secret... we go out. A LOT. As a family. To kid-friendly places like zoos, aquari... More

  • Maliheh
    Jul 25

    I think it all depends on your lifestyle. I work and by the time I get home and prepare dinner (I try to make home made food every night. we seldom eat outside) its dinner time and then the bedtime routine starts shortly after. If we are lucky we get to go to the park near our house after dinner for half an hour. So I do rely on toys to keep my kids busy while I’m cooking and preparing bath and... More

  • Nancy
    Jul 31

    Little ones need interaction with their parents, showing them things, teaching them how to play, really enjoying them and experiencing the world around them together. Toys can be wonderful teachers too but a child does best with a few really loved and really used toys at a time. Too many confuses them and overwhelms them. Children don’t need incredible trips and the most expensive play things t... More

Keith posted in Money Jul 18

What “family” policies do you want to see nationally and/or state-wide?

Parents! What “family” policies do you want to see nationally and/or state-wide? What policies exist in your states that you think could/should be rolled out nationally? (California has a family leave act right?) Here are some things I’ve collected from my dad groups: This nation should have at minimum 6 weeks of paid leave for ALL parents, Mother, father, and adoptive parents. A clause fo... More

  • Shadiah
    Jul 19

    Child care should be subsidized by the government - at least partially. The $5,000 dependent care FSA is measly and should be increased. Also, it favors larger companies (smaller companies are not eligible to offer it based on onerous compliance issues).

  • Julie
    Jul 20

    I think from a policy perspective, we need to take a closer look at summer. 12 weeks to figure out what to do with kids is a long time and places a burden on families who cannot afford child care or expensive camps. In my experience, summer is a scramble for the primary parent regardless of career status (at-home parents included). Given that kids lose 30% of what they learn over the summer,... More

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Jul 18

Birthday parties

Having a party for my son! Inviting his school friends, the children’s gym has a limit of 15 kids for the party! Inviting exactly 15 kids. 1 parent replied back saying the whole family will be there with both kids, how should handle this situation?

  • Brandi
    Jul 18

    I'd say, we'd love to see all of you, unfortunately the gym has a 15 child limit and we're at our max. If we get a cancellation, you'll be the first to know. Thanks for your understanding! We look forward to playing with (insert kid's name here) 😁

  • Angel
    Jul 18

    Tell them the invitation is extended to the child invited and one parent since it’s coming out of your wallet, then anyone else will need to pay separately it’s common courtesy. My husband accompanied his niece to a Bday party at a really fun pizza/arcade place here in Houston, but we paid separately for my son and I without thinking about it bc it would’ve been rude you know? Just saying from... More

Ashley posted in Behavior Jul 12

Why consistent discipline doesn't always matter

I found this thought-provoking and reassuring. I'm definitely the "soft" parent and I worry sometimes that I'm not "consistent" enough with rules, etc. But, as this points out, behavior issues aren't always straight-forward, and it's okay to take a gentle approach and address things on a situation-by-situation basis. "What if a child has good reason for... More

Thoughts on strangers approaching your child

I know babies are cute and always seem to grab people’s attention but, what are your thoughts and feelings on when strangers come up to your baby and touch them or play with them? The other day I was in line at the grocery store holding my 9 month old son in my arms and a lady came right up to us and held my son’s hand and let him grab her face. I wasn’t sure what to do..but she was definitel... More

  • Cambric
    Jul 31

    I know it can be uncomfortable, but I just try to remember that people mean well. And maybe getting a smile from your babe will make their entire day! You can also use hand sanitizer after.

  • Amelia
    Aug 02

    I was at a restaurant and these woman came in with 2 kids one around4/5 other was like 1 the server comes up and asks the older son what he would like to drink and the mom said “don’t talk to my son I told him to not talk to strangers if you need to ask him his order ask me” and I was at the table next to them like .....ummm k

Anonymous posted in Parenting Culture Jul 10

Mommy bloggers!

Just curious, who are your favorite mommy bloggers / instagram accounts to follow :) some of my faves: @cristalserranoo @krista_lynn_jones @tammyhembrow @madisonbontempo @lorenacarolinap @aforeverlylove

Infant ear piercing

Baby ear piercing...What are your thoughts?

  • Amanda
    Aug 01

    Their ears - their choice. Simple.

  • Amanda
    Aug 01

    @Elle - I would pierce my daughter’s ears (if I had a daughter) and I didn’t have my son circumcised.

ER and Dr visits

We just spent last night in the ER bc our oldest cut her upper eyelid/eyebrow which they, thankfully, only had to glue. Is it crazy that, while the 1st priority is their health and safety, you want there to be something for the Drs to do so as to not be a waste of time and effort?

  • Norma
    Jul 10

    My son had a similar injury but got 2 stitches.

  • Maria
    Jul 11

    I’m an ER nurse and when it comes to children nothing is considered a waste of time! As a new mom myself ...I have to stop myself from being worried about every little rash, running nose, fussy nights, fever etc , and have taken my kiddies to the pediatrician for things that were definitely minute. So I totally understand! ... even the reassurance of a nurse or doctor is all a parent needs some... More

Finish Your Plate...

...A phrase that I heard growing up often. I was never allowed to leave the table until I drank my gigantic glass of milk, or ate every parcel of food on my plate. Now I despise milk, and have an unhealthy habit of overeating. My husband and I often talk about what we will enforce as parents, and what we will be relaxed on. I would hate to implement those same tactics as my parents did on me.... More

Good article on parenting as a survivor of trauma

I went looking for info on this subject as it’s coming up for me again lately. Pregnancy and childbirth were difficult in pretty straightforward ways, but there are some other triggers coming up as I parent my kids who are slightly older now. I thought this might be helpful for others too. http://themamabeareffect.org/parenting-as-a-survivor.html

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