Grade Schoolers

Guidance and ideas for raising 5 to 10 year olds.

Depression?

My son is nine and doesn’t want to leave the house. Not only that but he doesn’t want to play with toys, hang out with friends and is a lot more withdrawn than usual. This is a very new thing going on with him but he also suffers from anxiety. I feel like he’s depressed, what do you think? Should I bring him to a doctor? Therapist?

  • Rebecca
    Apr 07

    Hi. I am a LCSW. Definitely would check with your pediatrician first. When these are signs of depression, it usually presents a bit different in children with more behavior and irritability. Lots of possibilities could be considered. I would try just talking with him seeing what he may say about the difference in his behavior and also would definitely check with dr and maybe also set up a th... More

  • Rachel
    Apr 11

    I’m a clinical psychologist and an expert in child and adolescent depression. These are certainly signs of depression, and I would recommend making an appointment with a child psychologist to have him evaluated. I do not recommend play therapy as there is no empirical evidence of its effectiveness. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a better option for a 9-year-old. There are a ton of great resour... More

Anonymous posted in Child's Health Mar 07

Type 1 Diabetes for 6 year old

Just found out my 6 year old has Type 1 diabetes. I got all the medical information and the doctors are figuring out insulin dosage etc. I just wanted to see if anyone has experience with this and can offer any advice or words of comfort? A bit of a tough time.

  • Kris
    Mar 14

    JDRF! www.jdrf.org Funds research and offers support and advice for type 1: kids, parents and family through all stages of life.

How to get my 6 year old son to stay in his bed all night?

  • J
    Feb 08

    We made monster spray for my step son and he sprayed the areas he was afraid of and if he got up in the middle of the night to call instead of getting out of bed and we would come to him instead. It took about a week he’s 9 now.

Help!!!

My 7 year old stepdaughter has been giving us attitude at home and is now acting up at school, not listening to her teachers and flat out telling them no. We talked to her about it but it's not helping! Any advice?

  • Elizabeth
    Feb 10

    I feel like even the good relationship my step kids have with their mom and the good relationship we have with her doesn’t take away from them having behavioral issues like that. I tend to teach them that it’s safest to act that way at home with us and the people that love them rather than in public with strangers. I always get back to the core of it by reminding them that we love them and want... More

  • Scarlett
    Feb 10

    I walked her to class and talked to the teacher. She has been not doing her work and standing in her chair during class which made the other kids laugh which in turn made her want to do it more. I had her apologize to the teacher and we had a much better end of the week!

How do you stop your child from repeating requests over and over?

  • Kate
    Mar 24

    I have had issues with this myself. It gets so frustrating! Sometimes I struggle because I try the ‘ignore’ method but that just usually ends up just about pushing me over the edge by the millionth ask! So that’s not effective I wouldn’t say. Lately I have been trying something similar to Andrea. Like after the second ask I’ll explain to him if his question is one that I’ve already answered m... More

  • Lisa
    Apr 01

    In the last month I finally stopped the million repeating questions!!! I simply turn the question around on my son, for example: where is Kristi(his sister)? I answer napping, the second time he asks I say where did I tell you she is? He answers napping then moves on to playing with something else. It has moved us past the billion askings for the same question. Hope this helps with others

Anonymous posted in Grade Schoolers Nov 17, 2018

My 3yr son invited to friends sibling birthday party. Gifts?

I work at a daycare and another mother told me about how much her son likes my son and invited us to her other child’s birthday party as her sons play date. It’s at a indoor bounce house. The other sibling she is around 5-6yr I want to give her something as birthday present . Any suggestions?

  • Traci
    Nov 17, 2018

    I would say something simple like a purse or pretend makeup. Things most little girls like. I asked the mom before I went because I had no idea what to get for my daughters friends siblings lol

  • Anonymous
    Nov 18, 2018

    You should definitely get a present for the birthday kid. Kids that age love the easier LEGO kits, board games, science kits (the ones where they grow crystals or do experiments), costumes, etc. you can always give a gift receipt if you’re worried.

Anonymous posted in Behavior Oct 30, 2018

My son has really bad behavior

My son will be 6 next month, he is in kindergarten this year, and he is very bad every day. At school he hits kids, is disrespectful to his teacher and yard duties, he steals from his classroom or his friends. At home he is just as bad he doesn't listen, he picks on his brothers and I have a very hard time with him. I’m his step-mother and he's been this way since before I met him, I kn... More

  • Brad
    Nov 16, 2018

    I’m not therapist but there’s almost always something at the root of the kid’s behavior. Therapist can help you identify what that is, and mitigate.

  • Anonymous
    Jan 30

    Well my son's biological mother was a drug addict so I would appreciate if you didn't judge and call us lazy parents he has some developmental issues that we are working on but the problem we have is that he was thinks it's funny to watch people get killed or hurt so he won't stop bullying other kids we have tried positive reinforcement and every type punishment you could think ... More

Anonymous posted in Behavior Oct 13, 2018

9 year old attitude

I have and 9 year old daughter and a 14 month old son. Lately they have both been going through changes but I am struggling to figure out what to do. My daughter has been having more and more attitude issues. I feel like I have tried everything from sitting down and talking, giving more alone time with me, waiting for it to pass and taking things and privileges away. I feel like nothing is work... More

  • Monica
    Nov 19, 2018

    I still have little kids, so I haven't been through this. With my kids, though, I try to remind myself that they don't usually act out unless there is a problem (hungry, tired, sick, frustrated, etc.) I realize the list of problems that are possible could be endless as they grow, but try coming from a place of compassion first. I'd even question if someone is being inappropriate wit... More

  • Kari Karma
    Dec 09, 2018

    My son is finally coming out of the “emo” boohoo stage after 2 long years of hearing it’s a phase I am getting my happy son back. I suggest to stay aware and ask questions seem concerned as you are clearly but don’t let her forget that even if she acts like she hates it give that love because that’s what they want is attention and screaming at them is attention but it’s not the right attention ... More

7yo lying, breaking rules no punishment helps

My son has been lying in school for no reason, making things up like hes been to Vietnam. And breaking rules. He traded his GPS watch for pokemon cards and said he didn't know where it was. I try to punish him but he doesn't care. I have nothing to take away. I will NOT spank him, but even threats to do it have no reaction. I have no recourse and can't afford therapy.

  • Londy
    Oct 13, 2018

    I’m having this problem with my 8 year old/3rd grader. He also has nothing left to take away and spanking doesn’t help so I’ve stopped. He didn’t have a Birthday party this year or last and he’s now seeing a therapist. We started last week. I’m at my wits end. He’s an all A honor roll student too.

  • Linda
    Oct 19, 2018

    I have 2 step granddaughters one 11 and one 8 they fight all the time with my daughter and her kids what can we do to have them behave better they tell her your not my mom we are so tired of it it’s been 4 Yrs now Help

Book recommendations

Chapter book recommendations for an almost 8 yr old first grader?

  • Christina
    Oct 07, 2018

    Amelia Bedelia books are great. My son loved them plus it gives you a chance to talk to them about the funny things adults say. Kids are very literal so they get confused when we say things like Hit the Road

  • Sara
    Oct 12, 2018

    Captain Underpants. My son loved the Jim Kay illustrated Harry Potter. Roald Dahl

Elementary Chapter Books

I need recommendations for 3rd-5th grade reading level chapter books! Thank you in advance 💛

  • Elissa
    Oct 22, 2018

    I loved American Girl books in third grade!

  • Deena
    Jan 18

    Dork diaries

Should I teach my daughter to fight back?

My lovely, smart, polite, friendly and well-liked girl is eight and in NYC 4th grade public school. I always taught her to obey the rules and the law but in this age of #metoo and with certain politicians violating the rights of women, how do I tell her to punch when she needs to? I've explained to her that certain things are never right, that boys (and men) should never touch her when she ... More

  • Tiff
    Oct 02, 2018

    You should explain to her that nobody (not just men or boys., but other females too) has the right to touch her in any manner that she does not want to be touched. Teach her boundaries and respect of other people's bodies and tell her it's ok to fight against anyone who tries to persist in violating her boundaries afyer she has clearly said no. There should be no need to bring up Stor... More

  • Anonymous
    Feb 21

    I'm mother to a boy and I say a resounding yes, encourage her to learn self defense and to advocate for herself. I teach my son about consent and toxic masculinity, but daily I witness how ubiquitously society encourages boys to feel entitled to take what they want from girls without suffering consequences. I see it all around us - in the media, from people around us, even his little friend... More

Allowance for a 6 year old??

Our six year old does chores on a regular basis. I dont want to do money allowance but she is super into her baby alive. So what I'm thinking of doing instead...is teaching her that hard work will get her what she needs in a way. Instead of cash allowance I am thinking of doing baby alive things like diapers and food. This is coming from a little girl who tells me to babysit her baby while... More

  • Alexis
    Sep 15, 2018

    I'm curious what makes you opposed to giving a cash allowance? Not that you have to, just wondering what your reasoning is. But aside from they, yes I think it's important to teach your kids about money from an early age. Teaching them to save and spend wisely by giving them the opportunity to do so is the best way! Whether you use play money or say that a certain amount of work will ea... More

  • Kelly
    Sep 15, 2018

    Highly agree with Alexis......it’s never too early to teach kids about finance and money.....it’s important for them to see how much stuff actually costs and to not just assume everything and anything can be had because mommy or daddy has a “magic” plastic card (my nephew actually calls it that 🤯). You could definitely even do “pretend” money and when she has enough for the actual baby alive it... More

What are good story books to read to a 4 and 5 year old?

I’m looking for recommendations for chapter or story books that are concise enough to read out loud but still have a good engaging plot they will enjoy hearing over several reading sessions. We’ve read through the Magic Treehouse series a couple of times and they loved those, so if you know of anything similar I’d love to hear it. TIA!

  • Kevin
    Sep 21, 2018

    I've read Winnie the Pooh in Latin off and on since my 3 year old was an infant. We've recently started Christmasaurus.

  • Morgan
    Sep 28, 2018

    The Chronicles of Narnia are a great series! The stories are very engaging and also integrate good morals. There are also some old school ones mystery series that I loved growing up: Nancy Drew, The Hardy Boys, The Boxcar Children, Encyclopedia Brown. These are all great for teaching problem-solving skills... you can make a game out of trying to "solve the mystery" before the main cha... More

How do you get your kids to eat vegetables

I have a 6 year old and a 8 year old that refused to eat vegetables. I have tried all kinds of vegetables and have cooked them different ways and still nothing. They get a different vegetable everyday for dinner. I've even gone so far as to try and blend them up to disguise vegetables. cauliflower mashed potatoes broccoli cheese soup. How do you get your kids to eat vegetable?

  • PK
    Sep 12, 2018

    Hidden veggie meatballs. I think there’s also a recipe out there where they somehow get cauliflower in Mac n cheese... maybe you can blend a vegetable into regular marinara or tomato sauce with some pasta. Your kids don’t even like dipping their veggies in sauce? I know your kids are much older than my son but he just figured out that dipping stuff in sauce is fun and tasty lol

  • Anonymous
    Sep 19, 2018

    Ever tried veggie quesadillas?

Son not making friends

Hi everyone it's my first time posting here, I want to talk about my almost 6 year old son's school issues. He has a very sweet, calm and kind nature and has basically never gone to any school before kindergarten ( where he is now). Due to him being born after August , we had to wait another year. Tk (transitional kindergarten) was an option but there were no available spots around me t... More

  • Anonymous
    Sep 11, 2018

    Talk to him about how it takes time to transition to school. Play act about how to ask people to play with you, and what to do if they say no. Sounds like he’s also struggling with the change of having to sit still and pay attention for so long. I’d get more details from the teacher about what she means by that, what triggers his lack of attention, and what ideas she has.

  • Alla
    Sep 11, 2018

    Thanks...sounds like a good idea

How much homework does your grade schooler do? My 1st grader does 2 hours of homework a night!!

I think it’s too long for a 6 year old who is in school for 8 hours!

  • Maya
    Mar 28

    In my opinion I think homework is important but it shouldn’t be abused. It sounds like you should write a letter to the school. I think that it is important to practice but there needs to be free time. Some adults think that free time is a waste but it is one of the most enjoyable things in life. If you decide to write a letter to the school your kids are enrolled in and they ignore your opinio... More

  • Malissa
    Apr 05

    My 3rd grader has had NO homework all year besides reading but my daughter dose about 2-3 hours of homework and she’s in kindergarten! I don’t get it!

Bullied on the bus

My first grade daughter has been getting bullied on the bus by bigger kids. I am already in contact with the principal about it. I'm trying to find the right way of telling my kid how to defend herself without getting herself into trouble. Any ideas?

  • Sunshine❤️
    Sep 04, 2018

    I was bullied really bad in elementary and jr high. The only thing i wish my mother would have instilled in me was you are who you are. And that i should love myself. I feel like parents tend to forget those little things. Once i realize how awesome i really was those comments from other kids wouldn’t get to me as much as they did. I have other friends whose parents would teach them self confid... More

  • Celina
    Sep 05, 2018

    Boxing. I put my son in boxing not only so he can put his energy into use but also so he can defend himself. Coaches usually teach them about self defense too and when it's okay to use it. Hope this helps 😁

How to talk to your 6 year old about moving to a new city.

We're considering a move in the middle of the school year. Looking for advice on how to frame the conversation about moving and starting a new school.

  • Zobeida
    Sep 04, 2018

    We moved in the middle of the school year when I was in second grade. I actually liked where we moved to better so I adjusted pretty quickly. On the other hand, we did it again 4 years later when I was in sixth grade, it didn’t go so well. I think it really depends on where you’re moving from and where you’re moving to and how well your child is settled into where they are and how well they adj... More

  • Household6
    Sep 30, 2018

    Coming from the POV of a military family: 1. It’s all about how you present it. “How would you feel about moving to a different city?” leaves the door open for resentment if they say they don’t want to move and you do anyway. It will go over much better if you present as “We have exciting news! We are moving! It’s a great town I’ve heard SO many great things about!” The best part is we get ... More

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